That You
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A L E X E I
the separated & determined
➣THE F A L L ▪'Lexei had grown into a petty, desperate and needy thing, so much so that eventually he got to the point where he got wasted beyond all reason and in the middle of the night broke into his father's bedroom only to force the man to become his physical lover. Albeit, this was after his mother left them both for another man who was more apt at bending to her will. By this time too, 'Lexei had two younger siblings; Pandora (Pandie) & Lucca, who 'Lexei helped raised from the moment he was first hungry.
'Lexei's attention seeking behaviour grew worse — I know, you're probably thinking how can it get any worse?! — until it came to one boiling point too many. Fighting between himself and his father was now mirroring that of Alfred and his mother only a few years previous. And whenever Alfred gave his son the cold shoulder to try and wean him off (because he wasn't interested in a relationship with his son!) 'Lexei would get piercings or tattoos knowing full well that his father wouldn't approve and flaunt them. Alexei was banking on the fact that Alfred would lose his temper and abuse him and in that sense, 'Lexei won. And often. That's how he got the scars on the back of his neck and his spine; glyphs were carved out and nape piercings ripped out. Yeah, it hurt, but it was worth those few hours of torment just to get Alfred to touch him; to feel wanted and worthy of attention. It was the most vicious of cycles.
Eventually — and in a move of desperation, — Alfred kicked 'Lexei out. He couldn't leave 'Lexei without nothing though and paid for his place of residence, but ultimately giving guardianship of Lexei over to his confidant, Élise Acelain Sauvignon. As luck would have it, this proved to be a brilliant move, as Élise became a healthy and nurturing mother figure, who also was able to gear the young man into a strong work ethic for Alfred's business. It wasn't without vices though, as the boy followed in his father's footsteps of becoming a high functioning alcoholic. Despite this though, 'Lexei — still having romantic feelings for his father — was able to gain positive attention through his work and determination. It was at this point in his life that 'Lexei also officially rejected his mother for her cruelty and use of him when he was a child. For all intents and purposes, it was as if Lexei was getting back on track.
Burying himself into work, becoming more efficient on a basis that seemed to be every day, his feelings for Alfred got pushed to the sidelines. 'Lexei tried dating multiple times, (sometimes throwing himself into them amongst a plethora of one night stands), but would find his thoughts constantly going back to Alfred.
Unfortunately, this obsession cost Lexei a wondrous relationship with a gentleman named Gregory, by the mere question of whether he was still in love with his dad Unable to answer, Gregory left him without any delay. At that point they had been living together.
With the loss of Gregory, it thankfully acted as a catalyst to propel 'Lexei towards taking steps to separate himself from his father, and abandoning his romantic feelings for the man. However, that is not to say that it slayed the inner demon of needing to be needed, and washed clean the gaping wound of deep seeded rejection in any fashion. It did force Alexei to come to the realization that his behaviour was detrimental to himself. But one can realize this and still decide to do it anyway. 'Lexei made a compromise. He approached Élise, as well as Alfred, to ask to continue working for the business, but at a geographical distance.
➣ THE N O W ▪ Alexei currently resides in London, heading the branch of his father's business there. The two's relationship is as one would expect of a normal father and son now, though they remain close by telephone calls, and annual visits to the family's villa in Lucca, Italy. 'Lexei tends to work long hours, often making up work for himself, and sleeps little. Sometimes, he has buried himself so deeply into work, when he honestly has enough money to simply not, that he forgets to eat. This does not mean that a bottle of wine is far away though. Or drugs for that matter. Ah, a new vice. Blame it on the career choice.
Despite his learned alcoholism from both his parents and his workaholic attitude, Alexei seems to be gliding through life quite well. He is well off, residing in a penthouse, as the need for a view is a visceral one. In contrary to his old, all encompassing need for acceptance from others, this trait only rears its ugly head when 'Lexei finds himself in a 'serious relationship'. Mind you, that's highly arguable as 'Lexei may take extremely good sexual chemistry as a sign of a relationship; even if it only started with taking him home, or him taking you. Doesn't really matter which. So, maybe it's not an 'old' need at all.
Furthermore, 'Lexei is a hypocrite when it comes to love. He does not handle someone demanding his time, attention and affection well if he is busy. Yes, he wants this more than anything and it gives him a reason to wake up in the morning,which transforms him into this beautiful, sweet puppy. However, if he demands someone else's, there is little forgiveness when denied. Being a whoreused is the best stress relief and tends to be not solely an outlet, but a compromise in these situations.
When quiet, or needing quiet, it can be pervasive. 'Lexei can become a recluse, indulging in booze and drugs; preferably GHB, opioids or cocaine. Everyone has their favourites. Uppers, downers - truthfully everything is on the table and doable. It is more so based upon his mood at the time and the kind of sensation/high he desires. That being said, when he finds himself indecisive, he will have a bit of both.
It's not like he's in short supply or has limited access to narcotics anyhow. Although, sometimes even in a good mood, 'Lexei will spend his day wasting away like this with the addition of setting himself up in the shower to feel the 'rain' - to feel something. Truthfully, it helps the time pass if and when he cannot make up work or errands to occupy himself, or doesn't have the energy to go hook up with someone.
'Lexei will also smoke socially, and 'earn' himself nights off to go to a club, especially if he cannot sleep. Which in turn helps make a cycle of him whoring himself. Being used is his ultimate way of self-harm, but also is a cathartic release because it gives him something that he chased for all of his childhood and growing up; being wanted & needed. Even if it's just a passing night means little, and when have emotions been a rational thing? Besides, if someone uses him like a cock sleeve, he'll have done something right, and that feeling is pleasantly compacted by cum dripping down his thighs.
Needless to say, 'Lexei is never one to shy away from a release, and has clearly made peace with getting trashed to the point that he is a gloriously high functioning addict to debauchery as a means of coping; Hedonistic to a fault.
