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Jude Izaak Butler

nothing but

basics

✵ name ✵

jude izaak butler

✵ gender ✵

male

✵ nicknames ✵

none so far at least

✵ age ✵

✵ birthday ✵

march 25

✵ hair ✵

black and fluffy

✵ eye color ✵

nutty brown color

✵ build ✵

slim and toned

✵ height ✵

185 cm

✵ ethnicity ✵

asian

✵ special signatures ✵

pouty lips, smile, dramatic eye roll

✵ spoken languages ✵

English and a little bit of Japanese

✵ handedness ✵

right

✵ tattoos ✵

none

✵ scars ✵

a bigger scar going from his knee to his thigh after having a motorbike accident in the past. It means he can't walk for too long and needs to sit down more
often, or, worst case scenario, use a cane.

✵ personality ✵

someone who usually puts on a smile even though he isn't feeling good, he's
used to always being the second choice and has for years had a crush on a friend of his and he never
had the guts to tell him. Now he's stuck and unsure of what to do with himself and has to move on from
his crush. Once comfortable he is however a funny and down to earth guy who can get excited over small things!

✵ extra things ✵

he likes to draw veichles and has a samoyed and used to study in Japan for a short while
which is why he can still remember some Japanese

✵ sexual orientation ✵

questioning

✵ face claim ✵

nut supanut lourhaphanich

WHY AM I ALWAYS
the 2nd in your heart?
________________

Just was sent to study in Japan by his parents who weren't satisfied with his academic works. He wasn't as great as they wanted him to be, even though he was the third best in his class. But nope, they wanted a child who could be "first place." They said he was too smart and was wasting his potential. So he was sent to Japan to study abroad in the hopes of enlightening his mind, not just academically, but hoping that Jude would find his special thing, the thing, the profession, the job, that would one day bring him to great hights. Instead of that, Jude fell in love.
It wasn't planned and had never been, but their families being very good friends - perhaps too good friends if the rumors of cheating between the couples were true - decided to send their sons to study abroad together. It had been a blessing and a curse at the same time. Jude's best friend kept him sane in between the long nights awake and the days where the only kind of energy he could run on was from huge amounts of caffeine. His eyes, and eventually his heart, was opened to feelings of love. A crush that wasn't just gonna go away, but was persistent in its tight grasp around his poor heart. His heart that would soon break to pieces.
Why? Because his best friend, the man he was hopelessly in love with, didn't love him back. All he saw was a good friend who he could contact whenever he needed a cheer-upper. That was all Jude really was. In the beginning it was fine. As long as he got to spend time with his crush, right? But all of that soon enough crumbled into dust.
After returning home from Japan his parents still weren't satisfied. He had improved his academics for sure, but he wasn't first place in his class. He had only reached second. Better, but not good enough. Those were the words that haunted him to no fucking end. Meanwhile, it was his best friend who had taken up first place in their class, meaning his parents were ecstatic, and of course they bragged about it nonstop to Jude's parents, which only served to piss them off even further. It was chaos. A war. A battle he could never win no matter what he did.
Instead of taking advantage of their engineering degrees, the two friends decided to get into motorbike racing. That hadn't been part of the plan either, and once his best friend had shown his interest in the profession, Jude had followed him like his own personal puppy. It only made things escalate further. His parents wanted him a nice job, to show how smart he was, but Jude was determined. It left a huge crack in the relationship between him and his parents, while he went to spend an awesome life beside his crush. But it wasn't as awesome as he had thought it would be.
He enjoyed it! Of course he did. He enjoyed the adrenaline that kicked in as soon as he sat in his racing car. But he was always second. Always. And his crush always came first. Always. Every race was the same. Jude was good, REALLY GOOD, just not good enough to beat his crush. In the beginning it was enough to be by his side and celebrate all of his victories, but the blissfull daze in the spotlight dissipated over time.
His victories were never celebrated properly because they just weren't as good as others. It was a fucking curse at this point.
His best friend got a partner and Jude had to realise that it was never gonna happen, and he might as well press "delete" on all of his unrequited feelings. It led him into an accident on the race track that almost cost him his life and he was injured to the point where he had to get surgery and spent more time in the hospital than he would have liked. In the hospital he was sad, crying and in pain, and he held his best friend's hand while he confessed to him, finally admitted the feelings that roamed his wounded body. The guy had looked at him with pity and sadness, and had said; "Jude, I know. I'm sorry but...you know we can only be friends, right? You know I don't feel that way about you."
Now he's recovered but he still has a big scar on his body after the accident, not to mention the scar on his heart after having to realise that he needed to forget all about his best friend who was happily in a relationship with someone else. The accident also meant that he had to stop his career as a bike racer, unable to continue driving like that. And it was okay. He was okay. Right?