Sanera
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N E E R Ax &x S A N D O R
"I want to wake up with you in the morning, I want to fight with you in the afternoon, and I want to make love on any and every available surface in this place. And then I want to do it all over again."
– Anne Stuart
L O V I N Gx A
C O M M A N D E R
As in other areas of their lives, Commanders approach relationships with a set of goals and a plan to achieve them, and proceed to do so with impressive energy and enthusiasm. People with the Commander personality type are in it to win, and will gladly take leading roles in relationships from the start, assuming personal responsibility for how smoothly things go and working actively to ensure a mutually rewarding experience. Romantic relationships are a serious business, and Commanders are in it for the long haul.
This sense of personal responsibility means that Commanders put a lot of energy into their relationships, and they show their creativity by always having something new on the agenda to keep things interesting, especially in the dating phase. At the same time though, Commander personalities keep their eyes on the long term, and if they determine that a relationship is heading towards a dead end, they will cut their losses and move on in what will seem to their partner an abrupt end to the attention they had been receiving.
This occasional ruthlessness with personal relationships is Commanders' primary weakness, and if they aren't careful they can develop quite the reputation. Sensing others' feelings and emotions will never be a comfortable skill for Commanders, but it is critical that they work consciously to develop it, both for their partners' sake and for their own healthy emotional expression. If they do not, they risk dominating and overruling their partners, and this insensitivity can easily break a relationship, especially early on.
Commanders are extremely growth-oriented, and will seize any opportunity to improve themselves, listening to and acting on criticisms, so long as they are logical ones, and always striving to improve their knowledge. At the same time, Commanders expect this of their partners, and it is surprising to them that others do not always share this attitude. Still more surprising to Commander personalities is others' active efforts to avoid these tense situations.
Commanders in particular would do well to remember that their approach is just one angle of a multi-faceted spectrum of alternatives. While Commanders may view criticism as the most efficient route (and they are often right), they should bear in mind that their partners may be more interested in emotional support and growth, an area of self-improvement that Commanders themselves too often avoid.
As with other Analyst types, Commanders' best matches are with other intuitive types, with one or two opposing traits to create more balance in the relationship. Mature Commanders are able to recognise and adapt to the needs of their partners, and know that even the most rational individuals have emotional needs that must be met. Fortunately the same logic that dismisses emotions is also able to recognise that a conciliatory attitude can be the best tool to get the job done. With their strong senses of responsibility and dedication, people with the Commander personality type are sure to make this effort, resulting in long-lasting, satisfying relationships.
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OTP PROMPTS
"He paid scant attention to the conversation. He could smell his own sent on [Neera's] body, and it satisfied him in a primal way... She gasped as he buried his nose in her maiden hair and inhaled. His scent was strongest here, in her gilded curls so soft and pretty in the morning light."
– Elizabeth Hoyt
W H I C Hx O N E . . .
Does something reckless and gets told off by the other person? ⟡ X.
Sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight? ⟡ X.
Sneaks up behind the other person to give him/her a scare? ⟡ X.
Falls asleep on the couch and who has to carry that person to bed? ⟡ X.
Kisses whom first? ⟡ X.
Has to restrain the other person in order to prevent them from getting into a fight? ⟡ X.
Says "I love you" first? And who ends their arguments in a fight with "Because I love you"? ⟡ X.
Watches the other person in his/her sleep? ⟡ X.
Offers their jacket when the other one is cold? ⟡ X.
Keeps getting threatened by the other's overprotective older sibling? ⟡ X.
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QUESTIONNAIRE
"All [he] now had to offer his queen were the strength of his sword, the depth of his magic,
and the loyalty of his heart. Such things did not win wars."
– Sarah J. Maas
⎨FIRST MEETING⎬
X.
⎨FIRST KISS⎬
X.
⎨FAVOURITE PARTNER TRAIT(S)⎬
X.
⎨ENDEARMENTS⎬
X.
⎨FAVOURITE MEMORY⎬
X.⎨PREVIOUS LOVERS⎬
X.
⎨FIGHTS⎬
X.
⎨JEALOUSY⎬
X.
⎨WEDDING⎬
X.
⎨THE FUTURE⎬
X.
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LOVE LANGUAGE
"He needed to keep as far away from her as possible, or they'd end up back in bed together or she'd kill him.
And he wasn't sure which he preferred."
– Anne Stuart
W O R D Sx O F
A F F I R M A T I O N
Sub headline.
To a person whose love language is Words of Affirmation, their partner’s appreciation and love are best affirmed to them through words. This someone who is uniquely aware of how powerful and beautiful words can really be. On the flip-side, for people with this as their primary language, insults or negative comments may cut a little deeper. Words can be used as a way to tear someone down or build someone up.
Since written and spoken language speaks directly to their heart, people with this love language will show their loved ones affection through effusive words, terms of endearment, and sweet little nothings, which are really sweet little everythings.
For people who gravitate toward words of affirmation, they find fulfillment through positive reinforcement via compliments or praise that shines light on something they did or who they are as a person. To some, words may not seem that meaningful, but to people whose love language is words of affirmation, underneath each word is an ocean of meaning and significance that is working to either strengthen or weaken the relationship's bonds.
"Steel shards, his eyes held hers. Breathless, [Neera] blinked up at him. His face was hard, a warrior's mask. Waves of anger and aggression lapped about her. 'When it comes to distraction,' he informed her through clenched teeth, 'nothing in this world could top you.'
His words were invested with meaning- a meaning she didn't understand."
― Stephanie Laurens
K I S Sx M E
Sub headline.
How to communicate ➵ Encourage genuinely and often, affirm, appreciate, empathize, and listen actively.
Actions to take ➵ Be encouraging and empathetic, express your admiration, leave love notes, compliments, and be yourself.
Things to avoid ➵ Non-constructive criticism, not recognizing or appreciating effort, and receiving affection coldly.
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OTP PROMPTS
"He turned to see her glaring at him, her blond hair a halo about her head in the carriage's lantern light, and felt his lips quirk. She really was rather extraordinary. A pity he could not make her his wife in reality."
― Elizabeth Hoyt
W H I C Hx O N E . . .
Is more afraid of loosing the other? ⟡ X.
Makes fun of the other person for having a crush on them? ⟡ X.
Is more protective of the other person? ⟡ X.
Thinks they don't deserve the other person's love and affection? ⟡ X.
Caves first in a fight? ⟡ X.
Constantly wears the other's clothes? ⟡ X.
Pays more attention to the other person? ⟡ X.
Puts his/her head on the other person's shoulder for comfort? ⟡ X.
Initiates the touching when the other person is near? ⟡ X.
Has vivid dreams about the other person? ⟡ X.
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COMPATABILITY
"He went to stand next to the bed and even though the room was unlit, he could make out, faintly, her slight form beneath the covers. The sight somehow calmed his soul. She lay in his bed, in his house, and no matter what bargain she thought she’d made with him, he knew the truth.
He had no plans to let her go – ever."
– Elizabeth Hoyt
T H Ex T A U R U S
&x T H Ex S C O R P I O
When a Taurus and a Scorpio come together in a love affair, their union is nothing if not intense.
They are opposite signs in the Zodiac, giving them a special, complex connection. Together they melt into one another to make a whole, each partner's strengths balancing out the other's weaknesses. Their sexual attraction is likely to be off the charts, and there is no denying the magnetic gravitation towards the other person. The Taurus and the Scorpio have abundances in common, but because their personalities are so domineering, and each tend to stand their ground rather firmly, they often swing between passionate love and passionate disagreement.
"Mysteries of attraction could not always be explained through logic.
Sometimes the fractures in two separate souls became the very hinges that held them together."
– Lisa Kleypas
Taurus and Scorpio signs both have deep desires, the Taurus for stability and the Scorpio for power. They are both concerned with wealth and resources, and they are both intensely passionate about all sorts of things. Both of these signs have a great, deep-rooted need for security in a relationship, but with slightly different focuses. While the Taurus prizes honesty and forthrightness and abhors infidelity, the Scorpio loves to be mysterious. A Scorpio's need for security is more about the need to be constantly reassured that their emotional connection with their loved one is strong. The good thing is, the Taurus needs this reassurance too - and is also willing to provide it for their Scorpio lover.
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"He had killed his way across the world; he had gone to war and back more times than he cared to remember. And despite it all, despite the rage and despair and ice he'd wrapped around his heart, he'd still found [Neera]. Every horizon he'd gazed toward, unable and unwilling to rest during those centuries, every mountain and ocean he'd seen and wondered what lay beyond … It had been her. It had been [Neera], the silent call of the mating bond driving him, even when he could not feel it. They'd walked this dark path together back to the light. He would not let the road end here."
– Sarah J. Maas
"He wanted her – all of her. Not just the physical her, but her devotion, her love, her heart – all the essential her, the tangible intangible of her being, her self. He wanted it all. And he wasn't going to be satisfied with anything less.
He knew why he wanted her, too. Why she was different. But he wasn't going to think about that.
She was his. He'd known it the instant he'd held her in his arms, that first evening with the storm lowering about them. She'd fitted, and he'd known, instinctively, immediately, at some level deeper than his bones. He hadn't come by his name by accident; he had a gift for recognizing what scent was on the breeze. An instinctive hunter, he responded to shifts in the mood, the atmosphere, taking advantage of whatever current was flowing without a conscious thought.
He'd known from the first just what was in the wind- known from the instant he'd held [Neera Morgane] in his arms."
– Stephanie Laurens
