Kalev 'Pony' Võigemast

(Short bio for now, will be fleshed out more later.
Pony is a CDDA OC, but is good for any modern setting or for post-apocalypse settings, especially ones where there are monsters to shoot.)

Name: Kalev Andres Võigemast
Nickname: Pony
Age: 24
Gender: Cisgender Male
Sexuality: (confused gesturing) (probably gay but he hasn't figured it out)
Height: 6'5"
Appearance: The lieutenant stands out thanks to both his height and broadness, a veritable wall of muscle that nevertheless carries himself with a gentle timidity. Just about everything on him is expansive, from his broad hands to his wide shoulders. Ash blonde hair is cropped close to his head, framing a face that is rarely shown in public. Maskless or not, his face is defined by his eyes- an almost startling shade of glacial grey-blue, giving his gaze an uncharacteristic intensity. His under-eyes are creased with tired lines, giving him a perpetually sleepless look. Despite his benign nature, it is easy to see how one could be intimidated by his appearance. The smell of cigarettes clings to him, tempered by the warm, amber character of his cologne.

Lieutenant Kalev "Pony" Võigemast was born in Estonia, but his family moved to the USA when he was 3. His Army nickname "Pony" came about as a joke thanks to his stoic, serious demeanor ("Kalev is all sunshine, ponies, and rainbows!"). Such a personality makes him fairly isolated and not especially popular in his platoon, but he is also admired for his expertise. It isn't that he is disliked- he's just not integrated into the social group. People generally assume he is an introvert who dislikes people and doesn't want to engage with others, but this couldn't be further from the truth- he just doesn't know how, and is afraid of failure. Pony doesn't have an aggressive bone in his body, but he finds it very difficult to fraternize with others and be charismatic. It's difficult for him to show emotions at all.

Pony is considered particularly odd for his propensity to hide his face, opting to wear a gas mask with the filters removed most of the time. When that's not practical, or in day-to-day civilian life, he wears a medical face mask. He has extreme discomfort with his physical appearance, his face just being one facet of this. Many have speculated that his mask hides some kind of grotesque deformity, but when they catch a glimpse, they merely see... a guy.

Overall, he is a bundle of extremely repressed emotions with very few coping mechanisms to let them out, including self harm. This manifests primarily as cutting and also extinguishing cigarettes on himself; he has a heavy smoking habit. As such, the uppermost parts of his thighs are fairly heavily scarred, and he occasionally has cigarette burns on his arms, although he tries not to have so many that it arouses suspicion unless he can wear long sleeves for a while.

He is a very uncertain Christian with a deeply religious family. As far as worship goes, he goes through the motions of Christianity, attending church and praying before bed, but prefers not to think about it too much beyond that. Why? Because then he might start asking questions, and that's bad. His doubts themselves are sinful, and he prefers not to indulge them.

Pony has never truly had a relationship partner of any kind and has never even been kissed. He's very perplexed about his sexuality and considers it another thing to push to the back of his mind and not think about. However, just like his feelings about platonic relationships, he yearns for an intimate connection with someone.

Other than this, he isn't sure what he wants to do with his life. Secretly, Pony would like to become a painter. He took painting classes as a child, and misses them greatly. He still occasionally draws, but doesn't make much time for it. He expects that he will just keep being in the Army until he retires, but that idea doesn't bring him joy, even if he is good at his work. However, he feels that his family would be upset and disappointed if he turned away from the Army to have an 'illegitimate' occupation - let alone his fears of not being good enough to make it as an artist.

Other facts:
- Pony's hobbies are mostly outdoor and active. He enjoys hiking, going to shooting ranges, and things of that nature. When it comes to his art, he also prefers to do this outside, painting or drawing what he sees in the natural world.
- He's somewhat technologically illiterate and barely uses social media or the internet except for when necessary.
- He has a modest gun collection, but he's fairly proud of it. He enjoys talking about guns with great enthusiasm, but doesn't do it often because he worries it might give off a bad impression or be disturbing to others. He doesn't relate much to the hypermasculine, aggressive, and conservative culture surrounding guns and doesn't want to be grouped in with it.
- Pony is very fond of animals, and is definitely one of the people who finds them easier to understand (and sometimes better company) than other humans. He'd like to have pets, but being in the military makes things a bit too busy for him to responsibly adopt an animal.