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Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

Once again, Jet's everflamming dagger came out, although he didn't activate the beam blade itself yet. After all, it made the soft hissing sound of a flame, and Jet didn't want to give away his position just yet.
He fell to the ground, robbing from console to console. Jet, ninja-journeyman, listened to the documentary as he went, waiting for the music to swell, for the interesting parts to quickly roll out from behind one of the console.

Then, suddenly, he came up in front of the Rhino. The dagger hissed to life in his hand, and he held it in the general direction of that guy's throat.
After all, it was hard to say if those rhinos hardly had necks.
"Your money or your life!" Jet demanded in the voice of his old captain. It was a pirate-classic.
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

1. The rhino is really dumb and thinks he has to guess the answer.
2. The rhino is a coward and begs for his life.
3. The rhino laughs and tells the kenku to take his money. He only has a few dollars and then whines about how little he is paid
4. The rhino says "My life" He goes into how much his life sucks and how the kenku will be better off.
5. The rhino does something stupid.
6. The rhino freezes and doesn't attempt to move or speak.
rolled 1d6 and got a natural 6.

Note: Reaction roll

U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

"Your money or your life!" Jet demanded in the voice of his old captain as his blade hisses to life. The rhino was clearly caught off guard. The reaction was hard to read, but he didn't react... at all. He sat there frozen, unmoving and unspeaking. There was a tense moment. The rhino began to sweat a little bit.

"Um," The intercom suddenly said in a monotone voice. "Warning! There is a problem."

The little droid did not elaborate as to what the issue might be. Given the current predicament, the timing of this cryptic and ill-timed announcement could mean one of a great many things and additional voluntary information would have been more than welcome. A tense space moment came and no additional follow up was offered.
Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

Jet gesticulated with the knife. Yeah, he probably should have a plan by now, but he didn't.
"Um" he repeated automatically as Yoo-nit spoke up. He was just doing it for the meme!

Well, it meant he had to do stuff. He made sure the Rhino was aware that there was a daggera few inches from his throat, then Jet used his free arm to take away the gun of the guard and lean it against…
against the rack filled with even more weapons right next to the guard. Right!

"Please step back from the line!" Jet used a bored space railway-station announcer voice, waving with the dagger. His free hand picked up the gun again, placing it on the nearby table. By now he at least had an idea what to do, he just needed Mr. Rhino man to cooperate nicely and step away from the boomsticks.

And for yoo-nits problem to not be more pressing than a few minutes.
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

1. The rhino is really dumb and thinks he has to guess the answer.
2. The rhino is a coward and begs for his life.
3. The rhino laughs and tells the kenku to take his money. He only has a few dollars and then whines about how little he is paid.
4. The rhino does something stupid.
5. Some more grunts walk in, but they don't immediately realize Jet is there giving him the upperhand.
6. Something else happens.
rolled 1d6 and got a natural 5.

Note: randomly random

U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

"Um," The little robot repeated again. It was unclear if autonomous toasters turned into navigation systems had tempers or patience, but if they did, Yoo-nit might be close to losing both. While the little droid had no way of knowing what Jet was doing, it did know that a group of goons was heading his way.

In fact, at that moment, a random number as determined by the dice roll below walk in. They don't duck because there is no bar to walk into. After all, this is a com room, not a bar and no drinking was involved except for a space water cooler in the corner.... so scratch that. Drinking is involved! However, not the kind that involved alcohol. Wait, scratch that again. One of them has a space flask and takes a swing from it.

In any case, the now disarmed grunt in the chair is still sitting there unspeaking and unmoving as his colleagues enter and are still unaware of him, Jet and the impending predicament he found himself in. The squad of rhino men gather around the cooler.
rolled 1d6 and got a natural 5. After the modifier of +1, got 6

Note: Group number

Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

Jet took the gun from the counter once more. Silently, he put the strap over his shoulder, so his hands were free for important stuff. He took a step aside, so the monitor would shield him from the new arrivals.

It wasn't easy focusing on your task when you were always just one step removed from doom, but the sooner Jet was done here, the sooner he could get the hell out of here. One hand still held the laser-dagger in the general direction of the Rhino he had nicknamed "Mr. Freeze" in his head for the obvious reasons, the other hand finally took control of the space-keyboard, searching for the door control. Someone had to unlock those poor doors from their shackles after all.
He just hoped the six grunts wouldn't have more spacial awareness than the other Rhinos he encountered so far.
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

Do the rhinos notice?

1. The rhinos ignore Jet
2. The rhinos take notice of Jet but don't realize the situation
3. The captive does something stupid
4. Hey! Wait a minute!
rolled 1d4 and got a natural 1.

Note: Let's be like 5 little Fonzies

U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

There are several tense moments. The rhino men stand around the space water cooler talking about whatever it is giant evil bipedal rhinoceros henchmen talk about on breaks from their minioning. They eventually leave and continue their patrol, presumably looking for Jet. The one in the chair continues to sit there in fear.

Finally, the comlink crackled to life again. "Um... danger! There are patrols in the area," Yoo-nit informed Jet. Unfortunately, that was a little outdated. However, at least the threat had passed for now. There seemed to be no other immanent threats for the the moment. After looking at the space keyboard, Jet noticed some buttons conveniently marked "doors". There were other interesting and somewhat useful looking buttons labeled with such words as "alarm", "lights", "Gravity", "Cameras", "Back Massage" and most interestingly of all "Do Not Press This!"
Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

Jet listened in on the henchmen-talk for a moment. It was an important source of information: now he knew that hunting him was paid overtime, but that it would only pay out if they filled out form A-7, and that they should be careful to check the 'lone hero doing a Die Hard' box, because otherwise it might be declined for lack of urgency.

Then a miracle happened: Yoo-nit talked! And not just said Um! Jet blinked, perplexed. He gave his hostage an amazed look, as if he waited for the poor Rhino to tell him that his ears didn't lie to him.
That guy generally looked a bit tense. Jet pressed the "Back Massage" button to help him out.
Also the door button, because that was what he was here for.
And the cameras-button, because when he was here already…

In his defense, he managed to control himself for four seconds before pressing the "Do Not Press This!" button. It was pure kenku bait after all!
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

The kenku realized the buttons on the panel were not being utilized. This was a shame because someone had taken time to install them. It was an insult to the artist to let a perfectly good button go unpushed! First, Jet pressed the back massage button the hostage let out a deep and pleasurable sigh. He closed his eyes. Obviously, this button induced deep relaxation.

Next came the door button. Should he look at the right monitor, the kenku would realize he had achieved his objective! The doors to the parking area were liberated, and so were all the ships trapped inside the bays! Great success!

After that came the camera button. That gave the poor overworked monitors a much needed rest. Who knew when the last time was that they didn't have to glow brightly and constantly convey pictures and images to those that gazed upon them? Such work must be exhausting! They winked out, including Space YouTube.

Then, things took a turn for the worse. In slow motion, Jet reached for the big red button that said DO NOT PUSH. The instructions were quite clear, as simple as they may be. Yet, Jet pressed the button anyway.

The hostage let out a long drawn out slow motion "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo". And everything went black. There was no bang, no explosion. Nothing. Everything ceased to be... at least for a few tense seconds.

The deafening silence was then broken when the kenku's comlink crackled to life. "Ummmmmm," Yoo-nit droned. It seemed the world had not, in fact, ended. As it would later turned out, Jet had turned everything off including the very pretty fountain with the light show in the main lobby that no one had seen as they had been directed through a special entrance. It also meant the vending machines in area 3 could not vend. But most importantly, the lights and gravity were also turned off and Jet found himself floating upward into the darkness and bumping his head as the ceiling was relocated inconveniently close to his head.
Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

The first button took the hostage out of the picture for the time being (well, given what other button's Jet would press: for the next five seconds). Who would chase a saboteur or radio in their position, when you could instead just enjoy having a back massage?

Being a true space-pirate, Jet didn't care too much about the ad revenue Space YouTube just lost either. Only when the station lost gravity (again), he realized he might've made a huge mistake.
Gravity usually kept him grounded, so Jet needed to be extra careful not to get carried away now!

"Ummmmm…" Jet answered, once again in unison with the poor toaster. He might've screwed up.
A pain-sound followed, as Jet crashed into the ceiling. This time, he used his laser-dagger like a lighter, giving himself at least some light in the darkness.
"Mission successful!" he finally informed Yoo-nit with the swagger of a vidoe-game announcer.

At least he hoped so, without working monitors he couldn't monitor if the doors were still ready to open up. As he started to think about it, they probably wouldn't be - not without energy. Jet pushed himself off the ceiling, towards the console once more. Holding onto it with one hand, he pressed the do-not-push button again.
As that didn't work in a nanosecond, he pushed it two more times quick, just to be sure!
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

"Mission successful!" he finally informed Yoo-nit with the swagger of a vidoe-game announcer.

It was probably not surprising to anyone, including Jet, that the little droid answered with yet another "Ummm" which it did.

At least he hoped so, without working monitors he couldn't monitor if the doors were still ready to open up. As he started to think about it, they probably wouldn't be - not without energy. Jet pushed himself off the ceiling, towards the console once more. Holding onto it with one hand, he pressed the do-not-push button again.

Regrettably, pushing that particular button or any other button yielded no further results, although that may not have been obvious to the kenku.

As that didn't work in a nanosecond, he pushed it two more times quick, just to be sure!

After the third push, there was a brief pause and suddenly, the lights and gravity returned abruptly resulting in an unexpected and potentially painful reunion with the floor. The captive had certainly not expected it and had come into contact with the chair he had previously been sitting in. The hurt factor only took a few seconds to kick in. Jet needn't worry about him, though. He was not seriously hurt but was consumed with repeating the word 'ouch' for the next several minutes.

Jet had no way of knowing it, but another terminal had kicked in and over ridden the settings of the area he was currently in. Furthermore, the particular terminal in front of him had been locked out, preventing any further disruption and rending the buttons useless except for the following one below.

A speaker came to life on the panel. Next to it was a microphone. "What's going on in there? What happened," a voice demanded. A button beside the mic that read "push to talk" flashed after the speaker concluded spouting words.

Meanwhile, Yoo-nit broke in with yet another monotone "Ummmm."
Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

As Jet hit the floor, there were unhappy kenku noises. One of his claw-like hands grabbed the console from bellow, and he pulled himself upright again. Seeing that his poor hostage had hurt himself, Jet decided to help the guy out.
He pressed the back-massage button again.

"Ummmm" Jet finally said to the microphone. "… had a slight weapons malfunction. But, uh, everything's perfectly all right now."
That was the problem with Kenku: if you were around one often, you quickly got déjà vu , because they had no choice but to repeat the same boring conversations again and again.

Jet quickly checked the monitor, to see if it was also alive - and if so, he might quickly check if the doors were online again, or if he could return to the space van already.
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

"Ummmm" Jet finally said to the microphone. "… had a slight weapons malfunction. But, uh, everything's perfectly all right now."

"Who is this, what's your operating number," a voice demanded through the speaker.

A moment later, Yoo-nit spoke. This time it wasn't his usual "umm" but an actual sentence. A sentence that actually provided useful information directly relevant to Jet's predicament.

"You are going to have company," The droid informed him in its deep monotone voice. When the kenku glanced up at the monitors, he found them blank. How boring! To further complicate things, there were a series of footsteps that grew louder and stopped outside the very door leading to the room he was in. The footsteps were followed by a loud banging on the door.

"Hey! Open up in there," A voice demanded.

Jet's comlink again came to life. Yoonit gave him a series of steps. It seemed Space Google Maps was directing him back to an air duct to make a hasty escape. The banging on the door grew louder and it sounded like the rude people outside were attempting to force the door open against the door's will, assuming the door wished to remain shut.
Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

"Nine." Jet answered in the cool voice of the Operator, taken out of a time-announcement.
For some reason, nine didn't seem to be a valid operating. Jet should've gone with seven, that was at least a prime number!

He decided to just kill the microphone with a quick slash of his laser-dagger. "Boring conversation anyways." he told Yoo-nit, before giving the weapon-locker a quick look.
"Give me a moment, I'm under the shower!" Jet shouted, hoping the Rhino's outside wouldn't recognize the voice from the ad for space butler-robots.

He grabbed a laser rifle, and once again didn't hold onto it. Instead, he removed the battery and stabbed it with his laser-dagger. If done right, this would start a cascading reaction that would end in the battery going boom. It was more of a darting flame and some unhealthy smells than an actual explosion, but Jet decided it was close enough.
He threw the humming battery at the door, then grabbed a handful more batteries from the weapon locker.
Those, he threw in the general direction of the first battery in one wide arc.

Hopefully that would keep them back a bit. Jet then left the door to it's own devices, as he started climbing into the air duct. By now, the ducts felt very familiar.
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

How effective is Jet's plan:

1. Not effective.
2. It kind of works but not well.
3. It does what he intended.
4. It works too well.
rolled 1d4 and got a natural 1.

Note: plan check

U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

Jet punctures a battery, but sadly, except for the battery being ruined, it doesn't do much. None the less, the kenku tried it several more times and none of the other damaged batteries produced the desired effect.

As the batteries were being ripped from perfectly good shooty things, the door opened a space inch.

"Um...," Yoo-nit came over the intercom.

Another battery was punctured and tossed.

"Um..." the droid repeated and the door raised another foot. Eventually, the kenku stopped wasting good shooty thing batteries and shifted focus.

Finally, Jet managed to scramble up the vent. The door rose a bit more. By the time the rhino people got it up (the door that is), the kenku was gone. The hench goons were distracted by the batteries and examining them followed by scrambling to figure out what paperwork this incident would require.

Once Jet was in the vent, Yoo-nit used Space Google to direct the kenku to another area using the vents.
Jet-Roar (played anonymously)

If this was a proper action flick, with space John Cena, Jet would walk away from an giant explosion in slow motion and look cool as heck.

Sadly, it wasn't, and sadly, Jet was only played by Jet, who was an lousy actor, so all that happened was some batteries fizzling out in some colorful but ultimately harmless flames.
One of the Rhinos got first degree burns on his big toe. Sadly, the henchmen-union wouldn't get him sick leave for that, so he would have to hench on.

Jet meanwhile felt like a roast chicken, crawling through the vent once more. "Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs…" he complained in the voice of a cop that was at the wrong place at the wrong time.
Still, by now he trusted the toaster with his life. After all, they were Um-Brothers. Jet was the brawn, and Yoo-nit was… well, Jet liked to think of himself as the brawn and brain of their little operation, but the small, self aware part of his brain suspected it not to be entirely true, and so he followed Yoo-nits given route, hoping that it avoided henchmen, heavy traffic and space toll bridges, and that he would get somewhere useful that way.
U.N.I.T. 35235236466-0001A (played by AgentMilkshake) Topic Starter

Although Yoo-nit had no way of knowing for sure, the little toaster had a suspicion that the kenku had probably managed to lose his gun again. That occurrence seemed to be either an ongoing theme or running joke, depending on one's perspective. Whether or not Jet, the droid, those in the building both good and bad and the rest of the universe was better off with a unsupervised kenku with a blaster was highly likely.

However, there was a very remote chance the previous statement was untrue. Such a possibility was astronomical and it was hard for one to imagine a situation where anyone would be better off with Jet having a shooty thing including the kenku. Nonetheless, Yoo-nit's next move was to guide the kenku to more weapons ensuring further hilarity would likely ensue in addition to insurance premiums going up in this sector and one or more beings day ending badly.

Space Google gave a series of turns leading to one of the following scenarios:

1. A large tank like-robot that was not actually a vehicle at all and likely had many non-removable weapons that seemed to be sitting idly. It of course, was not, but this is another matter, especially when Jet attempts to go near it.
2. A random space merchant selling wares. The absurdity of this situation should be ignored, but the encounter should not if rolled.
3. There are guns. Lots of guns. Unfortunately, Yoo-nit failed to realize these weapons were also attached to a squad of rhino grunts.
4. Cleaning supplies, guns... same thing... at least to Yoo-nit, but hey, maybe something is flammable in here!
rolled 1d4 and got a natural 2.

Note: What calamity occurs this time?

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