I think I've become a little jaded with roleplaying and I'm not sure I really have anyone to blame but myself. Pretty much since I started roleplaying (long before I found this site) I was shoved off into the romance corner and have yet to find my way out.
At first it was a lot of fun, then it got incredibly repetitive. The few times I tried to step out of the corner I'd get shoved back into it. I tried making characters that would be off putting to be with (some who even had abusive behaviors towards potential love interests) but it didn't really disway anyone. Around that point I gave up and continued to work as hard as I could in my little corner to make good characters so I'd have something of interest to do. It worked for awhile up until the point that I realized pretty much all the female characters I interacted with (except for two or three) where interchangeable stereotypes. Fed up I changed sites and made my way over here...
Only this time I found that I couldn't find my way out of the darn corner!
I still like the idea of having romantic interests in rps, but I can't seem to stop making male characters that attract too much female (or male) attention. Some times they start out fine but the moment I put them in an rp with an ILI they turn into overly romantic puppy dogs and I just can't seem to stop myself. They're doing things that aren't in their nature for someone they've known all of two days and it's enough to make me tear my hair out!
If anyone has any tips or tricks to break this cycle I'd love to hear them...or any tricks to make my characters unattractive enough (not just in looks but in personality) to where others have to actually spend a considerable amount of time to get to know them before they want to be anything more than friends or want anything to do with them at all?
At first it was a lot of fun, then it got incredibly repetitive. The few times I tried to step out of the corner I'd get shoved back into it. I tried making characters that would be off putting to be with (some who even had abusive behaviors towards potential love interests) but it didn't really disway anyone. Around that point I gave up and continued to work as hard as I could in my little corner to make good characters so I'd have something of interest to do. It worked for awhile up until the point that I realized pretty much all the female characters I interacted with (except for two or three) where interchangeable stereotypes. Fed up I changed sites and made my way over here...
Only this time I found that I couldn't find my way out of the darn corner!
I still like the idea of having romantic interests in rps, but I can't seem to stop making male characters that attract too much female (or male) attention. Some times they start out fine but the moment I put them in an rp with an ILI they turn into overly romantic puppy dogs and I just can't seem to stop myself. They're doing things that aren't in their nature for someone they've known all of two days and it's enough to make me tear my hair out!
If anyone has any tips or tricks to break this cycle I'd love to hear them...or any tricks to make my characters unattractive enough (not just in looks but in personality) to where others have to actually spend a considerable amount of time to get to know them before they want to be anything more than friends or want anything to do with them at all?
Not sure how easy this might be, but I can tell you emotionless characters would certainly not fall in love. IDK how easy that might be though. I have an emotionless Sci-Fi character if your interested in an RP where someone won't fall head over heels for your character. Hell thats the way I roleplay most characters, never done a Romance rp before.
I've tried making characters who were emotionally stunted. I don't know if I wasn't playing them well or if the person I was rping with was just mad because my character wasn't fawning all over her like everyone else was. Her character then started that creepy stalker behavior that's supposed to suddenly become endearing just because it's an rp, but just ends up making people so uncomfortable that they drop off the face of the earth.
I'd definitely like to see the character you're talking about...of course since I have no characters on here it would take me a little while to create one.
I'd definitely like to see the character you're talking about...of course since I have no characters on here it would take me a little while to create one.
EEh, I don't like people liek that :C Maybe it was just the people on that other forum?
But yeah once you got a character made shoot me a PM and I'd be happy to RP with ya.
But yeah once you got a character made shoot me a PM and I'd be happy to RP with ya.
I hope so.
Well thank you, and I'll be sure to PM you when I make a character.
Well thank you, and I'll be sure to PM you when I make a character.
Aright I eagerly await, and may use more than that one character
I shook my magic eight-ball and it told me the reason for your difficulties is: No plot.
Supporting this theory is that you make no mention of attempting any kind of plot in this post/in your profile/ anywhere. I'm sure at some point during your time in "the corner" you've heard the term PWP, or "Plot? What Plot?" to describe the practice of characters tossing the story overboard and swapping DNA as fast as possible. To look at this another way, if you keep your characters on task/distracted with story, the "romantic interests" in an RP won't be able to dominate it for lack of competition; better yet, insisting on some kind of plot will weed out the people looking for quick hookups. Trying to make a character unlikable is a worthy challenge, but not what will solve your problem. Make sure your characters do something so they aren't stuck doing eachother.
Either way you've come to the right site, a generous soul recently put up a page of 25 RP Concepts for the Community, that should get you started. Good luck.
Supporting this theory is that you make no mention of attempting any kind of plot in this post/in your profile/ anywhere. I'm sure at some point during your time in "the corner" you've heard the term PWP, or "Plot? What Plot?" to describe the practice of characters tossing the story overboard and swapping DNA as fast as possible. To look at this another way, if you keep your characters on task/distracted with story, the "romantic interests" in an RP won't be able to dominate it for lack of competition; better yet, insisting on some kind of plot will weed out the people looking for quick hookups. Trying to make a character unlikable is a worthy challenge, but not what will solve your problem. Make sure your characters do something so they aren't stuck doing eachother.
Either way you've come to the right site, a generous soul recently put up a page of 25 RP Concepts for the Community, that should get you started. Good luck.
I have to agree with Sland, the reason people get stuck in corners on anything in RP is because they don't pursue an active plot. Many of my characters have a goal in life that they can reach with some effort, ranging from the simple "I'm going to visit my relative on the other side of the world" to "There's this dragon that is terrorizing all of the world as we know so it's time to go slay it".
Think of it as a video game. One main quest line ('killing the dragon') with hundreds of side quests ('fetch this item for me', 'this person needs a stern talking to', 'join our totally unrelated military plot line while you get ready to defeat the dragon' etc) keeps a game interesting. Even when a romance happens (you court and marry your favorite NPC), you STILL have that pesky dragon to slay. That is always your main objective.
Setting up a story like this is almost always guaranteed to get your story going and force yourself out of that corner. Admittedly, you'll need someone who plays along well. If you have the above and still fall short, you need to find new people to play with who are more in tune with this kind of RP. I've tried roleplaying with people who are in a different category than myself and it always bums me out because they don't share my ideas and it halts the progress in my stories, so a combination of a good plot with the right people = guaranteed success!
Think of it as a video game. One main quest line ('killing the dragon') with hundreds of side quests ('fetch this item for me', 'this person needs a stern talking to', 'join our totally unrelated military plot line while you get ready to defeat the dragon' etc) keeps a game interesting. Even when a romance happens (you court and marry your favorite NPC), you STILL have that pesky dragon to slay. That is always your main objective.
Setting up a story like this is almost always guaranteed to get your story going and force yourself out of that corner. Admittedly, you'll need someone who plays along well. If you have the above and still fall short, you need to find new people to play with who are more in tune with this kind of RP. I've tried roleplaying with people who are in a different category than myself and it always bums me out because they don't share my ideas and it halts the progress in my stories, so a combination of a good plot with the right people = guaranteed success!
I don't know how much this appeals to you, but talking OOC can help sometimes. I usually get caught up in the romantic plot lines too, even with characters who should never fall in love. What I had to do was talk to the person I was roleplaying with and we found a happy place where their character wasn't so damn appealing to me and they didn't feel left out without a love interest.
sometimes finding someone who will listen out of character can make things a little easier to handle and you can always pull back the reigns and go "Woah! This ain't supposed to be happenin' partner!"
sometimes finding someone who will listen out of character can make things a little easier to handle and you can always pull back the reigns and go "Woah! This ain't supposed to be happenin' partner!"
I don't busy myself trying to avoid romance, but I think it's only cropped up as even a serious option twice in my (admittedly short) time here. (That's not to say it wasn't overdone other places I've been.) I'm not sure I could pinpoint why, though.
I do make it clear on my profile that romance should never be an expectation. I'm not opposed to it, but I see it as being as likely as becoming bitter enemies in general.
I try to keep myself open to at least trying to play with just about anyone, but I have developed a sense for (and occasionally mild prejudice against) people who I don't expect to play well with. I'm sure I judge too quickly at times, but I look at the player's posts (IC and OOC), profile, characters... Certain things tend to clue me in on what to expect. And, sorry to say, there are some people here who I will not play with unless they are specifically trying to improve.
I have some characters that romance just won't work with. A key example: I have a small squirrel child - you romance that, you got issues. And while I play, while I'm not actively avoiding it, I tend to keep away from language and such that could invite it, such as observations about another character being attractive. Instead, I've made use of, in a way, friendzoning language, such as referring to the other character as "kid" or other things that establish a different sort of relationship than romantic. Heh, and some of my characters have issues that would make attempting a romance with them incredibly frustrating.
And you can always reject the romance if it persists. YOU should get to have fun too. If the character doesn't take the rejection IC, talk to the player OOC. If that doesn't work, it's okay to leave a game.
From what you described, my main suggestion would be to be choosier about who you play with.
I do make it clear on my profile that romance should never be an expectation. I'm not opposed to it, but I see it as being as likely as becoming bitter enemies in general.
I try to keep myself open to at least trying to play with just about anyone, but I have developed a sense for (and occasionally mild prejudice against) people who I don't expect to play well with. I'm sure I judge too quickly at times, but I look at the player's posts (IC and OOC), profile, characters... Certain things tend to clue me in on what to expect. And, sorry to say, there are some people here who I will not play with unless they are specifically trying to improve.
I have some characters that romance just won't work with. A key example: I have a small squirrel child - you romance that, you got issues. And while I play, while I'm not actively avoiding it, I tend to keep away from language and such that could invite it, such as observations about another character being attractive. Instead, I've made use of, in a way, friendzoning language, such as referring to the other character as "kid" or other things that establish a different sort of relationship than romantic. Heh, and some of my characters have issues that would make attempting a romance with them incredibly frustrating.
And you can always reject the romance if it persists. YOU should get to have fun too. If the character doesn't take the rejection IC, talk to the player OOC. If that doesn't work, it's okay to leave a game.
From what you described, my main suggestion would be to be choosier about who you play with.
Thank you for all the advice.
While early in my time RPing I didn't bother with plotting, it has become a concern when I actively seek out people to RP with. Of course by the time it starts the hours/days of plotting seem to vanish. I've never really tired to keep people on task though and have generally, grudgingly, gone along with whatever they wanted to do for the sake of not making people mad. The few times people have stuck to the plot they've blown though problems with an ease that shouldn't be possible to get back to whatever type of romantic pursuit they were doing...or I'm rescuing them so much that we never get anywhere. The later has given me an extreme dislike of any character I have to rescue more than once (especially if said rescue doesn't lead to moving the plot along).
As for there being no mention of plotting in my profile, well I don't really have a reason for that. I think this might be one of two sites that I have anything written in my profile area.
I generally RP with anyone who shows interest, and probably should be a bit pickier then that. I tend to get a little too excited when someone shows interest and don't take the time to ask the questions I should or press the fact that I don't want a purely romantic story.
I've never been all that great at communicating...of course if getting better at doing this will make me enjoy RPs more enjoyable then I'll try a lot harder then I have been.
Also Sland thank you for the link to that list of prompts.
Again, thank you all for the advice. I will keep it in mind the next time I go to set up a RP. Especially the advice about communicating.
While early in my time RPing I didn't bother with plotting, it has become a concern when I actively seek out people to RP with. Of course by the time it starts the hours/days of plotting seem to vanish. I've never really tired to keep people on task though and have generally, grudgingly, gone along with whatever they wanted to do for the sake of not making people mad. The few times people have stuck to the plot they've blown though problems with an ease that shouldn't be possible to get back to whatever type of romantic pursuit they were doing...or I'm rescuing them so much that we never get anywhere. The later has given me an extreme dislike of any character I have to rescue more than once (especially if said rescue doesn't lead to moving the plot along).
As for there being no mention of plotting in my profile, well I don't really have a reason for that. I think this might be one of two sites that I have anything written in my profile area.
I generally RP with anyone who shows interest, and probably should be a bit pickier then that. I tend to get a little too excited when someone shows interest and don't take the time to ask the questions I should or press the fact that I don't want a purely romantic story.
I've never been all that great at communicating...of course if getting better at doing this will make me enjoy RPs more enjoyable then I'll try a lot harder then I have been.
Also Sland thank you for the link to that list of prompts.
Again, thank you all for the advice. I will keep it in mind the next time I go to set up a RP. Especially the advice about communicating.
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