Forums » Smalltalk » Life. I'm tired of it. (Vent)

Okay, so we were preparing to move to Houston with our tax return money. At the same point, one of the interim managers suddenly quit at work, leaving me an amazing opportunity: training up in this nation-wide store's management system. Hell, after a few years if people like me, I might even show up in in-store commercials. That part is a stretch but still -possible-. Regardless I could get a good paying job in an industry that I love that I could transfer almost anywhere in the country with and retain solid hours, pay, and management positions.

Grampa and Kathy, my mother in law, said, sure, stay there! Train! Learn!

Right when I'm about to tell my boss yes, I'll be your SGA, please train me, grampa turns around and says "get out. I'm closing the house because of all of the problems it has."

Keep in mind. We have lived here for four years with faulty wiring, plumbing, a cracking foundation, broken windows, no locks and so on. We never faulted grampa's lack of repair because he is old, and we were too poor to fix it ourselves. I have a life changing opportunity ahead of me, though--and suddenly, we're being told "get out by the end of the month".

I'm so mad I could cry. I tried to look for other apartments or rental properties but this little town has just about every free slot filled up. He's essentially giving us like two weeks notice. I don't even know what to do. What, move to Houston, unprepared, without my manager's training, and struggle there, too?

I'm... lost. ";

This sounds like a huge blow to a dream you had just been given. It's okay to feel devastated and lost and angry and exhausted when something like that happens!

But it also sounds like you don't have much time to indulge those feelings before it gets taken away, and to save it you're going to need to do some very creative contortions. How long will the training take? Is there a couch you could crash on for a month or two while you look for another apartment? Are there motels where the rate is comparable? We have a few of those in town that I wouldn't really want to live in long term, but a few weeks while I trained and looked for a more permanent solution would be okay. Is it possible at all that a very thorough heart to heart with your grandpa to show him how important this is to you, but also to find out what the specific stress is that is making him want to close the house *immediately* is? Keep throwing stuff at the wall without nay saying any of it until something sticks, maybe you'll be surprised by what works!

You're one of the most determined people I know. I have a hard time imagining that there's no way on earth that you of all people could make this work if you threw your whole brain and heart at it. We're all rooting for you!

Thank you, Kim. I would have no problem squatting on a friend's couch... if I didn't have a four year old girl to worry about. A family of three moving in on a couch doesn't work so well.

I've been trying to get in contact with a friend since she expressed interest in rooming at one point... I'm hoping she's still willing, because then maybe the one available apartment in town will actually be in my price range. 650ish isn't so bad when there's a potential of up to 3 working adults. But then I'm going to end up nailed down to this town until she's done with college, because I won't bail on her when I'm ready to get up and gone.

I'm going to try to talk to grampa about it but... he's... old. And very stubborn. Very, very stubborn. I mean he's so set in his ways he canceled his cable because he was tired of "paying to see inter-racial couples on TV". Now he has two stations. When he gets a hare up his ass it's hard to get it out.

But those are my two best options.

It's just so infuriating. The next chance I'd have at management is some frickin' fast food job or something. Or moving to another store, starting at the bottom of the chain, and climbing all over again. I am LITERALLY so mad I am crying. It's not even being sad necessarily, even though that's in there. It's like I feel my blood pressure skyrocketing and the pressure is releasing in tear format.

...it's not helping that my connection is flaking out, even as I'm trying to VENT... Ever since this old bitty flipped open her laptop down the table from me I can't hold a solid connection for more than five seconds. I don't know what the eff she's doing but I want to smash her screen.

Oh let me add to the stress factor I'm going through right now:

I'm pregnant.

Just fyi.

And worse than that my sister in law doesn't understand. She's just like, here's apartments in Houston! It's okay, if you're that good you can just become a manager there! It doesn't work like that. This business has a surprising set of red tape, laws, tier lists, and other difficulties. I'm... my options are find an apartment that is free and in my price range and doesn't exist in this town, or move to Houston unprepared and start ALL OVER AGAIN only to need maternity leave in like seven months. It took me a year to get where I'm at now.

UGH.

I worked for the same company as you for awhile, it IS possible to have your boss see if there are any open keyholder positions at a store in Houston and you can transfer, in a major city like that there is probably more traffic and turnover. I'd definitely tell your boss the situation and see what she has to say about it. I'd be hesitant to room with someone else since I know how your last rooming situation ended.

yes, but to get sgain transfer you need ga 1-3 and sga 1-3 and asm level 1 knowledge at least. I'v only got sga 1 and could easily learn the rest since they dont even have another good option. So basically, i stay here and actually learn sga and asm positions, qualify up to even assistant manager -then- transfer, so any store can take me as sga level even outside of district.

and what we did with our last roommate was an act of kindness to someone who made it seem a necessity when they came to us. She passively voiced it and it would be us coming to her. she even worked multiple jobs for a while. she's responsible, not wanting it at the end of their rope. toootally different. and ashli loves her. Shes as good with ashli as family.

Minerva, I don't know you at all, but you were kind enough to reply to me in my introductory post. I'd like to help ease a bit of your frustration and perhaps lend a bit of new perspective to your current difficulties. Let me preface by saying: I've been in your situation. I've been unemployed for over a year and in most places, that would make me unemployable. Through a vast conspiracy of luck, good fortune, and a heaping helping of support from my amazing wife, I'm working again and in a career which I love. I just say this so that you know that I can fully empathize with you and so that you know that you're not alone.

With that said, on to the unasked-for advice. I'm not sure of your area or of the number and size of nearby urban locations, but you might try opening up your search radius for homes. Look on Craigslist, you might be surprised at what's listed there. Oftentimes, you can find homes for rent (instead of apartments) and comparable prices. I understand that your town is tiny and available living space is severely limited, but look at your budget and see how far you can afford to live from your workplace. Perhaps you'll find that you have a bit more flexibility than you think you do right now in the panic of the moment.

I hope that everything works out for you. I'm not going to give you meaningless platitudes and cliches like 'it'll all work out in the end' or 'just calm down' or some crap like that. It doesn't help you at all and sounds patronizing at best. I know how you're feeling--I've been there myself. Sometimes, life sucks and there's not a whole lot you can do about it except try to live through it. This is one of those situations. Just know that you have at least one more person pulling for you.

By the way, congratulations on your pregnancy! I know it's yet another stress-factor right now, but it's still good news as far as I'm concerned.

I looked up HUD homes but Der looked at me like I was nuts. This is a dead end town you try to escape. when the five year rent agreement is up my store probably leaves town... I think i may look to buy a travel trailer...

Oh, Fran, please send me a friend request. I can accept but not send while mobile.

Well hopefully then the rooming situation will turn out and you'll be able to stay at the store. Have you heard back yet?

she's probably coming over tonight and we'll talk about it then. But failing that, i'm looking for a travel trailer or even a singlewide to pay on.

Trailers can be extremely roomy and nice, Minerva, they don't have to be nasty. I've stayed in one or two that were both and seen some very swanky ones. If you could PM me your general area, I could do some searches for you. Maybe I won't find anything you haven't already found--and perhaps it's too weird to send that kind of personal information to someone you don't really know--but I'd like to help in whatever way I can. I hate to see someone having such a hard time.

Yeah if you need help looking stuff up just lemme know, I know it's kind of a pain with mobile stuff. Good luck with your talk tonight, hoping everything works out!