Forums » RP Discussion » Roleplaying for the Shy Types

So I wanted to get some advice on how to approach others and/or discuss issues and ideas during a RP when you are PAINFULLY shy. And I don't mean "nervous cute finger twiddling" shy, I mean "panic attack at the thought of asking a question" shy.

How do you go about asking questions to others, or approaching others for RP? Do you mentally prepare yourself, try to have a script of sorts in your head ready to go, or do you bite the bullet and ask?

Please, share your tips here! Maybe it'll help other shy types out there too!

I'm not really sure how I got to the point of "recovering shy person"...mostly because I'm still terribly shy.

But one thing I've noticed is that we're really not alone in this. A lot of people I've met in various RP communities have been shy as well.

It sounds like I'm talking about a bug.
"They're as scared of you as you are of them!"

But, well...If the shoe fits?

Typically I just bite the bullet and send a message. However if the character has a guestbook sometimes I'll leave an in character comment on their guestbook which is sometimes just enough to break the ice so to speak....


Hope that helps!

What message are your panic attacks telling you?

Honestly, that is a good question. It actually varies from situation to situation. However, the basis of it is either a fear of rejection or just being misunderstood outright, no matter how good my intentions are.

Hi Lotus,

While I'm not TERRIBLY shy, I understand that it is super intimidating to approach people sometimes! I find that the best thing for me to keep in mind is this; we're all here for RP! That's the reason we're on the site. So they want RP just as much as I do. And, as a player on this site, I have a RIGHT to ask others for RP. Now, they have a right to say no, but that doesn't squash my right to ask! It is completely in my power and my control to ask others if they want to RP. I have found that when I realize I have some control in a situation, it really helps relieve some of my anxiety.
You can do it! I believe in you You have a right to have fun, and everyone else here wants fun too!

I feel like I'm in something of a similar boat right now...

I haven't roleplayed with strangers or even talked on a forum at all in eons it feels like, and I have no idea what to do or how to go about it... I feel so weird talking to people or making threads or responding to them I know people are here to RP and the worst thing they can say is no, but I feel like I don't want to inconvenience people. (I mean straight up I feel like I'm being bratty and an inconvenience even responding to this thread right now, heh.)

So I guess we just have to convince ourselves that having fun is worth a little bit of worry, and that if anybody does react badly to a simple message they're probably a jerk in the first place X3 Though I doubt anybody's gonna bite you. In my creepy stalking of the forums and reading people's posts you seem like a super nice person... (okay self don't be weird )

Well, I am EXTREMELY shy IRL, so here's basically what happens:

Someone new walks up to me, my face immediately flushes bright red and I avoid speaking as much as possible. Basically only answer questions and give a short question during awkward silences.

When I walk up to someone new, my face BURNS red. If I ask them a question, I do it quickly and stammer often. I try to give minimal conversation, as my brain practically shuts down when I approach someone new, and when an awkward silence hits, I walk away slowly and awkwardly.

Hoped that helped! After writing this, I now know just how hard this is to explain... and how bad it sounds when I explain it... lol

(BTW, this is only face to face. Online, I am super friendly, so ask me anything if you need something clarified! )

This. This so much.

I just can't seem to RP with people other than my group of friends. Probably because my writing quaility is really poor. Probably because I'm afraid of attracting people I don't want to RP with. I don't know.

Anyway, to get on topic, my advice is to not be like me and take a chance. "Bite the bullet", as everyone says. The worst that can happen is your offer declined. But...I'm sure people would ask you. You have a great personality and if I wasn't so scared of RPing, I would have already made an offer to you.

Hope this helped (sorry if it didn't)

In my own experience, people either tend to misinterpret me or downright ignore me most of the time - especially if they disagree or are too afraid to give a straight 'yes' or 'no'! As a result, I've grown somewhat more socially anxious myself. I'm not frequently rejected outright, but getting the 'cold shoulder' response is just as often disheartening.

The way I see it, people have different interests, and there will always be more popular interests. This is particularly relevant to genre. If your interests resemble others', you've got far less to fear and so much to gain in approaching people! But, if you're like me and your interests tend to be considered a niche, you'll either encounter a lot of cold shoulders or straight-up rejections of your offers. I'd say don't get discouraged, but it's not something you can actively control in situations like that. The only way to gain confidence and feel better is to find those people (or groups) that share your interests, so make good use of that "Find RP" feature and search all over the 'net to find them!

Out of every 7 or 8 players I start an RP with (or just approach with an offer), only 1 tends to give it a real go. When you find those special individuals, hold on to them if you can. They make all the little disappointments worth it in the end.

H..hi i am ... new to this... and i need tips..

welcome to RPR! you should maybe make a thread in the Intro forum so people can welcome you and give you general advice, or in the Help forum if you have any specific questions you can't find an answer to in the Help section.