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Something I'm learning to do when I'm writing is check the beginnings of my sentences, because while I'm fine at varying sentence length, I do have a certain knack for writing a bunch of simple sentence starts. It can start to be tedious to read after a while, I've found. I'm gonna list a few examples from your text under the readmore:
I only noticed it near the end of the topography descriptions and the beginning of the Draconic Empire's history, though.


Quite a few of your topographical paragraphs start off with to the southeast or to the north. It's a good transition for every three paragraphs or so, but it stops being a transition when it's used as a sort of paragraphic formula. Maybe use it in the second sentence, or put it as a secondary noun.


Sometimes passive voice can show poor writing form, because it allows the object of an action to be the subject of a sentence. I'm not really good at detecting it, but here're a few sentences that I thought had it:

- "The world of Hexxis is made up of several continents and regions."
- "Which the most noteworthy are listed below."
- "...closely grouped together, which are named under the Isles of Dusk."
- "This continent is known for being much more strange,..."
- "Many parts of the continent are drenched in fog or darkness."
- "...by thick stone walls, which are carved and decorated to resemble beautiful..."
- "The city is decorated with many colors, banners, and bits..."
- "The walls are carved, depicting many deities of..."
- "These can often be used for travel, as they link up to..."
- "...isles", where no man or beast was supposed to tread."
- "...one Elder actually doing so, which was soon assassinated by outside forces (often speculated..."
- "The Istine Union's men were mostly clothed in lamellar, tribal helmets, and..."
Here's a guidebook for it.


Pronunciations of your cities might look/read better to the left of your colons, but I don't actually know.

When you do parenthesis, you tend to put a period in them. Like this:
(often speculated to be of Kirsikan origin.)

Parenthesis are like a P.S. note at the bottom of a letter, but take away the idea that they're sentences from that. They're meant to go after the thing they're describing, and are like a footnote that can't be put anywhere else in your writing. They don't need periods, as they aren't really considered a full thought. Here's a grammar guide to them from someone smarter than me and that can explain what I'm getting at better.

You also put a space around colons, like this : and that's not correct, either. Here's the smarter person again for that

"The walls are carved, depicting many deities of the afterlife and undeath."
'Of' doesn't like being beside nouns without an article adjective

Sentence fragment

"Its capital is Dragon's Tooth, a massive, walled city. The walls are made of charred marble, and its streets are lined with decorative bronze."
Although 'decoratively' looks like an adverb, with -ly at the end, it's an adjective. Adjectives don't go after nouns, and the sentence sounded like a run-on once that mistake was corrected, so I just split it up. Doesn't quite flow as prettily, but you can pretty it up how you'd like.

It features four towers, which are also the main gates, at the very north, west, east, and south points of the walls.
'Of' doesn't like being in front of nouns without an article adjective

The Founder of the Draconic Empire is a large red Dragon known as Emperor Urstagahn, who resides in the empire's capital.
Beings aren't referred to with 'which.'

Urstaghan first tried using diplomatic strategies to try to convince the Southern and Northen leaders to pledge their allegiance to the Draconic Empire. One leader - an elder - accepted his offers of wealth in exchange for surrender, but they were soon assassinated by outside forces (often speculated to be of Kirsikan origin). The elder [that took the dead one's seat] then refused the offer. In short, he failed.
I counted fifty-nine words here, so I'd say it was a run-on. A few grammatical errors made it sound okay as one, so I tried to make those sound better and keep the bones of your sentence as much I could. Brackets are stuff that I don't like how I put it and that you could prob make better. Also, I added a bit of a sardonic tone because that's just how I do. Feel free to edit it out.

Underground
I'd take out islands here and just leave landmasses and maybe add an adjective for the flow, just because of personal preference. It'd read like this after: "...lies a large outcropping of landmasses..." Outcropping may not be the best word depending on the connotation you're going for, but you get the idea.
The preposition "of" is a bit awkward at the beginning, but if you like it for the sort of pretentiousness it holds, then keep it.

A lot of your paragraphs have a very noticeable structure. Here's an example: If you look at the sentences here, you'll see that there's not one sentence that's not either complex or compound. Sentence variation is very important, else the reader doesn't really take in what's being said and their mind can't slow down enough to process what's been told to them. Constant lengthy sentences can make for rushed reading, too, and reading informational passages like the one above ought to be somewhat relaxed and slow in my opinion.