Forums » Smalltalk » Partners leaving/deleting characters a lot lately?

Hey now please tell me it's not just be but the last couple of RP's I have invested in have come to a rather sudden and awkward stop. I have found myself chatting with someone setting out all the details with an RP starting it and getting along smashingly only for them to suddenly disappear. Now I don't mean haven't replied in a while I mean full on deleted their character and or profile!

Most of the time it's an anon player but I have even had one whole account delete while we were talking daily! Like they will reply and when I wake up to reply back poof the character is gone and I can't communicate in the messages anymore! I think the worst part is I can't even ask what happened are they okay? or was my writing truly that bad? It's very worrying especially when you were talking daily for them to disappear I feel like something awful has happened but its probably just busy life? But I mean a little warning would be nice haha

I don't know what's happening but it makes me feel awfully self conscious like am I doing something wrong? I don't think I did anything to make someone feel like disappearing is the best answer but who knows?

What about you guys anyone else had some one completely disappear?

Edit~
Just making it clear there is nothing wrong with being slow to reply or going quiet, it's the complete and utter cut off by deleting the character or your account that bothers me. Because then I can't make sure they are okay or ask what was wrong with the rp.

I've had it happen to me and it's one of those things, unfortunately. A lot of people are too shy to say they've lost interest in a character or they've lost the muse for a specific RP. It sucks when it happens, especially if you had a good dialogue going or the characters really seemed to sync. It's a big part of the reason why I rarely play with anon characters.

It's extremely rude and very bad manners to disappear without warning. I am thoroughly disappointed with anyone who have ever abandoned another roleplayer without explanation or telling in advance. While I have done the same on occasion waaay back when, I have stopped that entirely because I know now how much of a dick move that is.

Then again, I take roleplaying pretty seriously. I invest emotionally in my characters, and other people's characters. And time. I spend probably three hours a day typing away on replies alone.

I'll admit it: I'm one of those people who has to stop replying to roleplays for a little while because I'm just not in the mood at the moment or I'm too depressed (or writer's block, ugh...). I'll also admit to not telling people about all of that; it's unnerving to admit my mental issues and it may make me look selfish for doing so.

But I'm not one of those people who would just outright delete a character or exit a character out of a 1×1 RP without a heads up or a reason why! I've had that happen to me as well, and it hurts because I also have an emotional attachment to the stories I create and share with others. So when I see that someone has exited out of a PM or deleted their character, it makes me feel like I wasn't worth the time to even give a heads up before they did so. Which hurts, because it also implies that they weren't as emotionally invested in the RP as I was.

So all in all, yes, I know that pain... All too well in fact. That's why I do my best to keep updates alive and let people know that I'm still into a RP as much as I can. And if it's seemed to any of my RP partners that I've ditched them because I haven't sent out a reply for a minute or two, I am so sorry; I didn't mean to make it look like that, and things happen to where I can't reply ASAP, you know? But deleting character profiles or moving my character out of a PM without warning is, like Cinders said, a dick move that I would never wish for anyone and their dead spirit grandmother's uncle's worst enemy. If I'm not interested anymore, I'm upfront with it. I also expect the same from my partners.

No way Pip, you're awesome! I promise when I dropped out of ours awhile back it was only because of work. We had soooo much overtime. I dropped out of basically every single one I had started on the same night because I knew I couldn't do it. I'm the type though that if I must drop out, I send a warning, usually with the promise to try again when not busy.

The reason for that being I had someone tell me in the past once they were taking a short break, and came back active on the site without so much as a word in relation to our paused Rp we had invested sooo much time in. It was never finished and that character he had was deleted.

I do admit though, I'm bad for not answering right away if I think I'm going to write a rushed or super tiny post. (Usually when exhausted from work) Then I forget to reply for a few days and am like "Oh crap!!" a week later with an awkward apology. x3

I've had several people just stop responding and logging on, apparently. We'll get a great idea going, I express a lot of interest in their character, the writing on their profile is good. So we get a plot going or we get the rp going.

And they just stop responding. I have about 17 active rps because so many people seem to flake out, so I'm hoping I'll salvage several good rps out of it all.

I'll send a follow up message asking if they're okay, busy, if something wasn't meeting their expectations . . . Nothing so far.

I don't think it's a reflection on you, Pip, I just think some people don't want to admit they have lost interest, are too busy, etc. Sometimes I wonder what I did wrong whenever people stop responding or just don't log on anymore. But then I think, "Whatever, screw them," and move the rp into the "flakes" section of my inbox. I haven't been back into rp long enough to have someone just delete their character or account.

On that note, I should be more regular on ours again starting tonight .

To be honest, I've had this happen, and I have to owe up to being one of those people here and there that don't get a reply out as quickly. Because like mentioned ahead of me, Writer's Block, Severe Depression, and on my side, Real life Kicks my butt really hard sometimes, and my laptop keeps getting abused. I have two kids, as well as two side jobs and a house to run. Sometimes I kind of forget, but that is why lately, I've made myself a RP Skype, to keep in contact with all of my Partners, so if something does happen, and they do message me, I will tell them honestly, hey this is what's going on, it's gonna be a hot minute before I can get back to that, or if I lose interest in something for the time being and I talk to them about, putting that specific rp on hold. I promise you that it isn't you, your characters or any of that, Trust me. It will get better, I promise!

You're fine!

I get it if people are busy and can't post quickly, but whenever we had a great rp going and they drop off the face of the rp planet I'm like, "What the hell."

Also I'll be on vacation from tomorrow to the 23rd so no pressure. I'll be checking the site sporadically but I don't always like making long posts on my phone.

To be grim, its the circle of rp life and it happens to everybody. It always stings the first few times but after a while, its shruggable, and for every partner you lose, 10 more will replace them.

As for why? I myself have a terrible memory, I forget to answer things and time by goes into months of accidental silence.( kudos to my partners who put up with me lol) Outright deleting I've found is never personal and is just a person feeling overwhelmed or whatever personal reasons may be there and not having the energy or will to tell people. Personal reasons again, I know its hard, especially if the plot and character are /that/ good, but I think its important to respect their decision, let them do them and move on to new things. No matter where you roleplay its going to happen sadly.

This happened to me only an hour or so ago. I'm one to form attachments to those I choose to do stories with, because when I use my characters it's like giving a peice of myself to some stranger. Then, they don't reply for weeks. Eventually I start blaming myself really, believing I have below average rp skills.

Then I get a message that, suddenly they are no longer interested in rp. I guess I always get a little too invested, because when they leave it feels like a peice of me is missing.
Gotta stop myself before I cry over something so stupid.

Yeah I feel bad when they are too shy to say they got bored maybe I wasn't chill enough in the OOC chat haha. Yeah Im not offended when people wanna drop out or anything as long as they tell me. Like if I can still contact them with a 'hey this rp dead?" and they say yeah sorry then that's like 100% okay. It's the fact you can't contact them which sucks haha.

Yeah kind of wary of Anon rp's now which sucks cause there could be an awesome plot idea I love but seeing it hosted by an anon makes me go 'eeehhh... nah let's not bother chatting' which I know is really bad practice but it still just sits in my gut.

Yeah it feels super rude. I haven't done it since I was like what 14? I learnt it hurt so why do it to others kind of thing? See it was perfectly cool when we had to put our one aside no one can help being busy or having a high work load come along and I totally understand if people want to select the rps that are the most fun or invested in. I feel a little sad for a second sure but I mean rp is meant to be fun not a chore after all!

See there is nothing wrong with taking a break from an rp, writers block and depression are killers when it comes to writing moods so that is totally understandable! And plus you let people know so your practice is fine! It's the totally cut off that bothers me. If people need a break or to chill I am 100% okay with that. Totally agree with being upfront is better than deleting. I shouldn't have such a stigma around it that scares people off or makes them shy. If you are not having fun with an rp there is nothing wrong with that there are so many reasons why that could happen even if the plot idea was great. Maybe your characters don't mesh well? Or writing style. That doesn't make either of your characters or writing bad they just don't fit.

Its like a jigsaw puzzle. Sure this piece doesn't fit with that one doesn't mean you toss the piece out! The perfect fit is out there you just gotta keep looking! I wish people didn't feel so scared about it I wish we could all be more chill and content rather than be scared of someone lashing out at you because like srsly who lashes out when someone wants to stop an rp? Sure you can be sad but you can't be that angry if you are there is a problem with you big time not your partner. People just need to be more kind to each other :^:

Aww thank you hon! It's reassuring to hear my writing was still good! And yeah life and work is far more important that RP and you were super nice and polite about it! The perfect shining example of dropping an RP. You didn't make me feel bad or anything it was 100% understandable! I wish more people were like that!

And yeah I get sick quiet often and that really saps my will to write so sometimes my daily responses take a week, but I always let my partner know and try to make up for it later.

Yeah I always follow up messages too. If someone hasn't replied in a week or two and hasn't deleted their contacts, if they don't reply to that I count the rp dead and move on. See that doesn't bother me too much because that is a common thing people just chickening out but at least they still have a way to be contacted. It's the ones who cut off completely that bother me. ((Also ps thank you for the kind words ))

Thanks for the kind words And it's totally fine if people get caught up in life that is never anyone's fault! I didn't mean to make it sound like that was bothering me! It was the complete cut of communication. Like if they are anon and delete their character I have no way of asking are they okay. That's what gets my goat so to speak.

Yeah it's a real confidence hit isn't it? But don't feel bad! Like everyone has said above its never your fault its just life getting in the way or people being shy.

And never feel bad about someone saying they lost interest like I said in an earlier reply rp
"Its like a jigsaw puzzle. Sure this piece doesn't fit with that one doesn't mean you toss the piece out! The perfect fit is out there you just gotta keep looking! " Never feel bad that your pieces didn't fit! You are a part of a bigger and better picture after all!

I can totally sympathize with you! Out of nowhere about ten of my rp's have come to these sudden stops.

It's a big petpeeve of mine.

Sometimes when I am in a good RP, the person never replies and they reply elsewhere. This was notorious on facebook where people would drop characters in the middle of a goodRp.

Really pisses me off! Especially when you have a good role-play going and then they do not respond so you go to message said person, especially if they have an anonymous character that has been deleted. A warning would have been nice beforehand

And don't even get me started on those people who are clearly online, and have been for the majority of the day. That can't even give you a short reply.

I am honestly guilty of this on more than one account, but it was only after the rp had been dead for some time or my own partner had suddenly vanished. I mean, if I wanted to rp with you I would at least try to let you know whats up. Now I know real life can keep you away from rping sometimes too, but just saying. It kind of makes you feel like you weren't a good rper if someone just drops out of the rp suddenly without explanation. At least in my opinion.