Hey, everyone
Recently I've been feeling like dirt and I wanted to talk to someone about it. I won't name who they are. Alright, so I've talked with them about my issues, and they weren't helping much so I said bluntly to them our conversation wasn't getting anywhere and it was making me feel worse. Then they got seriously offended and I wanted to make amends with them, but they blocked me before I could apologize. As someone with autism, I still fail to understand what I've done wrong here, but I could understand why she took offence to that; not on this level though. Regardless, they are a close friend to me, and I don't want to lose them over this; I've already lost enough friends as it is. Is there something I'm completely missing out on? I could provide more context than this, since I have a feeling it's a bit more complicated than my previous summary, but what do ya'll think I should do for now? I want to make it up to them, but I don't know how.
Cheers
Recently I've been feeling like dirt and I wanted to talk to someone about it. I won't name who they are. Alright, so I've talked with them about my issues, and they weren't helping much so I said bluntly to them our conversation wasn't getting anywhere and it was making me feel worse. Then they got seriously offended and I wanted to make amends with them, but they blocked me before I could apologize. As someone with autism, I still fail to understand what I've done wrong here, but I could understand why she took offence to that; not on this level though. Regardless, they are a close friend to me, and I don't want to lose them over this; I've already lost enough friends as it is. Is there something I'm completely missing out on? I could provide more context than this, since I have a feeling it's a bit more complicated than my previous summary, but what do ya'll think I should do for now? I want to make it up to them, but I don't know how.
Cheers
Yes, you're missing something here.
I'm not saying that to be cruel or dismissive. That's what happens with autism. Give your friend time. Don't pursue them, don't try to fix it. Give them time to cool off and if they're your friend and they care about you, they'll reach out when they're ready.
When they do reach out, /DO NOT/ tell them how you were right all along. Don't tell them they were wrong to block you. Don't tell them they were wrong to get upset. Listen to what they have to say and if you don't understand it, say that. 'I'm sorry, I don't really get it, but I never meant to hurt you. I'm really sorry. I'll try not to do it again.'
Then ask, 'Is there a way when I'm making you feel bad that you can cut me off and let me know, because I just don't get it.'
I'm not saying that to be cruel or dismissive. That's what happens with autism. Give your friend time. Don't pursue them, don't try to fix it. Give them time to cool off and if they're your friend and they care about you, they'll reach out when they're ready.
When they do reach out, /DO NOT/ tell them how you were right all along. Don't tell them they were wrong to block you. Don't tell them they were wrong to get upset. Listen to what they have to say and if you don't understand it, say that. 'I'm sorry, I don't really get it, but I never meant to hurt you. I'm really sorry. I'll try not to do it again.'
Then ask, 'Is there a way when I'm making you feel bad that you can cut me off and let me know, because I just don't get it.'
Corinthi wrote:
Yes, you're missing something here.
I'm not saying that to be cruel or dismissive. That's what happens with autism. Give your friend time. Don't pursue them, don't try to fix it. Give them time to cool off and if they're your friend and they care about you, they'll reach out when they're ready.
When they do reach out, /DO NOT/ tell them how you were right all along. Don't tell them they were wrong to block you. Don't tell them they were wrong to get upset. Listen to what they have to say and if you don't understand it, say that. 'I'm sorry, I don't really get it, but I never meant to hurt you. I'm really sorry. I'll try not to do it again.'
Then ask, 'Is there a way when I'm making you feel bad that you can cut me off and let me know, because I just don't get it.'
I'm not saying that to be cruel or dismissive. That's what happens with autism. Give your friend time. Don't pursue them, don't try to fix it. Give them time to cool off and if they're your friend and they care about you, they'll reach out when they're ready.
When they do reach out, /DO NOT/ tell them how you were right all along. Don't tell them they were wrong to block you. Don't tell them they were wrong to get upset. Listen to what they have to say and if you don't understand it, say that. 'I'm sorry, I don't really get it, but I never meant to hurt you. I'm really sorry. I'll try not to do it again.'
Then ask, 'Is there a way when I'm making you feel bad that you can cut me off and let me know, because I just don't get it.'
Yeah, thanks a lot man. I'll definitely consider your advice for later
Aw man, I've done stuff like that too.
Seeing that someone talked to you about this already, I'll just say this.
I hope everything turns out fine for you guys!
Seeing that someone talked to you about this already, I'll just say this.
I hope everything turns out fine for you guys!
Funk wrote:
Aw man, I've done stuff like that too.
Seeing that someone talked to you about this already, I'll just say this.
I hope everything turns out fine for you guys!
Seeing that someone talked to you about this already, I'll just say this.
I hope everything turns out fine for you guys!
Thanks a lot, man! They have replied to me about what I've done wrong, so that's some progress!
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