Okay I just wanna ask, if any of you ever did this before tell e what was on your mind when you did it. What happened to the other person? How did you stop it?
I just wanna understand why people do this. If it’s to make the person better about themselves. Because to me it’s the worst thing ever. I hate bullies and I just wanna know what went through people’s heads when they though this was okay to do.
I just wanna understand why people do this. If it’s to make the person better about themselves. Because to me it’s the worst thing ever. I hate bullies and I just wanna know what went through people’s heads when they though this was okay to do.
So far as I can tell, some people just don't comprehend what it is they're doing. They only see the world through they're own perspective. If they think something is funny, of course it is, it's all just a joke and no one should take it seriously. If they think it's justified, of course it is, and the other person just needs to see how wrong they are. If others can't understand they just need an outlet, that's everyone else's problem.
I know the jock character from The Breakfast Club also gives some insight into bullying mentality.
I know the jock character from The Breakfast Club also gives some insight into bullying mentality.
Some people are angry and depressed, often from being bullied, and they lash out when approached in what they feel is a disrespectful or thoughtless manner. It often causes them to be bullied more, not truly unjustly? I would say? To the outsiders' perspective, it is just a rude person entering a room and flinging insults at the drop of a hat. But the cycle can continue and devolve into something worse, all from something that could have been very small and insignificant, until the bullied individual loses all connection with society and people as a whole.
It's a sad cycle that is often unrecognized when it occurs, due to people not understanding, or simply not caring. Humans do not often exhibit mercy towards the sadness of another individual and find reason to mock them in this; So why would they do so towards outright anger?
It's a sad cycle that is often unrecognized when it occurs, due to people not understanding, or simply not caring. Humans do not often exhibit mercy towards the sadness of another individual and find reason to mock them in this; So why would they do so towards outright anger?
While never having done this I have been on the receiving end. I have a pretty thick skin so my reaction was, at least as an online presence, pretty negligible as fire vs fire is not thr way to go. (Funny enough, it was centered around RP, and my old RP community.) I didn't lash back and I was open and honest with my friends about what was going on so when it started to spread a little they had my back. BUT, that isn't the point I am trying to make here...
The point is that IMO when you are talking to someone face to face you have to see them, you have to acknowledge that what you are doing has an impact. While when it happens online there is this level of distance and separation. You can say something mean, spread a damming rumor, even say worse words than you ever would IRL and walk away from the computer to forget. Like a game, like a stress release. Y'know, someone made them upset IRL so they turn around and try to make you upset but never really have to think about it after that. You stop being a person.
In my personal experience the one who was attacking me wasn't doing it directly, they were using me as a scapegoat to gain sympathy. Telling people who would listen how awful I was because of this reason or that reason, when really, I would never do anything like what they accused. The character I played would, but he was just a character, and had only interacted with theirs 2 maybe 3 times. It spread like wildfire to have people I had never even talking to making accusations because they wanted to feel like they were part of it, part of the group of hurt people. And I think that is where a big part of online bulling comes in, is that they wanted to be included but also didn't really see the wrong in it. "Others are doing it, why shouldn't I?"
I think it's when people realize the harm, that IRL and OL are the same thing unlike IC and OOC. That we are people, not NPC's in a video game of life, that they start improving themselves maybe attempting to stop. But I am no expert and this is just speculation. The best thing to do is to make them see you as a person with thoughts, feelings, hopes and dreams. Because while that doesn't always work to end it, it does make it a lot harder to continue.
The point is that IMO when you are talking to someone face to face you have to see them, you have to acknowledge that what you are doing has an impact. While when it happens online there is this level of distance and separation. You can say something mean, spread a damming rumor, even say worse words than you ever would IRL and walk away from the computer to forget. Like a game, like a stress release. Y'know, someone made them upset IRL so they turn around and try to make you upset but never really have to think about it after that. You stop being a person.
In my personal experience the one who was attacking me wasn't doing it directly, they were using me as a scapegoat to gain sympathy. Telling people who would listen how awful I was because of this reason or that reason, when really, I would never do anything like what they accused. The character I played would, but he was just a character, and had only interacted with theirs 2 maybe 3 times. It spread like wildfire to have people I had never even talking to making accusations because they wanted to feel like they were part of it, part of the group of hurt people. And I think that is where a big part of online bulling comes in, is that they wanted to be included but also didn't really see the wrong in it. "Others are doing it, why shouldn't I?"
I think it's when people realize the harm, that IRL and OL are the same thing unlike IC and OOC. That we are people, not NPC's in a video game of life, that they start improving themselves maybe attempting to stop. But I am no expert and this is just speculation. The best thing to do is to make them see you as a person with thoughts, feelings, hopes and dreams. Because while that doesn't always work to end it, it does make it a lot harder to continue.
Going into specifics could result in rustling feathers and/or infracting on RPR's TOS/FAQ rules.
However, yes I have. I used to do so quite frequently. It wasn't, consciously anyways, a means to yield a faux feeling of being better than someone. No. It was to see what information about that person I could exploit to manifest the most vile and deprecatingly vicious statement(s) about a person. I used to enjoy it a lot. I still employ those tactics sporadically, but (typically) I just move on now-a-days.
However, yes I have. I used to do so quite frequently. It wasn't, consciously anyways, a means to yield a faux feeling of being better than someone. No. It was to see what information about that person I could exploit to manifest the most vile and deprecatingly vicious statement(s) about a person. I used to enjoy it a lot. I still employ those tactics sporadically, but (typically) I just move on now-a-days.
You are on: Forums » Smalltalk » Cyber Bullying
Moderators: Mina, Keke, Cass, Claine, Sanne, Dragonfire, Ilmarinen, Darth_Angelus