1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
My sister not talking to me. She's not the most communicative person, but she messages her bff all the time and I never get a response from her. I've tried to initiate, and it's not that she outright ignores me I think, she just doesn't bother responding. So I've gone days, weeks, without ever hearing from her. Friends ask me "How's (little sister) doing?" and I have to respond with "I honestly don't know". It wrecks me sometimes because I really miss the close friendship we used to have.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Saturday, I got home from a busy weekend out and couldn't find my keys (we had taken my boyfriend's car). We looked everywhere, and I was so stressed out that I was just starting to cry even though I was trying to hold back. Thankfully, my amazing boyfriend found them shoved into a crack in the back seat (must have fallen out of my bag at some point), but it was SO stressful because I did not have a spare car key (I promptly went and got a copy made).
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My boyfriend, definitely. I have many friends/things that help me feel better, but just last night I was fretting over the storm rolling in (I hate storms), and he was texting me and he told me to hold my one stuffed animal, close my eyes, and take in a deep breath. I did, and I found out he had spritzed his cologne on that stuffed animal, so it smelled like him. Instantly felt better
4. Are you lonely right now?
Nah, I'm good
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
It depends on what. Usually it's my boyfriend or my best friend, sometimes it's my parents if I need some 'wizened words'.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
If I need a pick-me-up, I always go to Disney songs. Belle, songs from Moana, etc. But I also cannot listen to the Hamilton soundtrack without getting so into the raps.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Not a band, but more of a song. Bad Day by Daniel Powder is my sad song. My best friend played it when I was sleeping over at her house and I found out my grandpa died, many years ago when I was like twelve. Ever since then, it's been what I listen to as my sad mood song.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SO MANY THINGS.
Life man, life is anxiety. But really, I'm just kind of worried about being able to get to where I want to be. I want to get a new job, a better paying job, and be able to financially afford life as a normal person. Also, student loans are a constant stressor because I'm gonna be paying those off until/after I'm dead.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
I have a few methods. I try to find a moment to pray, to take my anxiety worries to God and find peace that He has it all under control. Then I'll snuggle kitties, or look at cute animal pictures, or find something physical to take my mind off it. I will also speak with someone like my boyfriend, to help confirm that my fears are unbased.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
I occasionally have nightmares, and honestly it ranges to a lot of things. Sometimes as wild as boarding an alien ship, othertimes as regular as my boyfriend breaking up with me. It's weird.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My family. I have an amazing family.
12. One regret?
Once upon a time, I was approached by an up-and-coming comic artist about storyboarding for his new comic book. I was only in my teens at the time, and I wasn't feeling all that 'inspired', so after a couple pages I told him that I was getting too busy and couldn't do it. Honestly, I just didn't wanna put the effort in. Now, I think about what an amazing opportunity that could have been, and I still kick myself for it sometimes. But I try to use it as a learning point, where it's like, 'okay, good opportunities are going to take a lot of effort'.
13. One thing you're proud of?
I'm honestly really proud of my writing, mainly my sci-fi trilogy.
14. One thing you wish?
I'm not going to get on a super deep spiritual level, and instead I'm going to say that I wish my trilogy was finished and completely edited already.
15. Virtual hugs?
Of course!
My sister not talking to me. She's not the most communicative person, but she messages her bff all the time and I never get a response from her. I've tried to initiate, and it's not that she outright ignores me I think, she just doesn't bother responding. So I've gone days, weeks, without ever hearing from her. Friends ask me "How's (little sister) doing?" and I have to respond with "I honestly don't know". It wrecks me sometimes because I really miss the close friendship we used to have.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Saturday, I got home from a busy weekend out and couldn't find my keys (we had taken my boyfriend's car). We looked everywhere, and I was so stressed out that I was just starting to cry even though I was trying to hold back. Thankfully, my amazing boyfriend found them shoved into a crack in the back seat (must have fallen out of my bag at some point), but it was SO stressful because I did not have a spare car key (I promptly went and got a copy made).
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My boyfriend, definitely. I have many friends/things that help me feel better, but just last night I was fretting over the storm rolling in (I hate storms), and he was texting me and he told me to hold my one stuffed animal, close my eyes, and take in a deep breath. I did, and I found out he had spritzed his cologne on that stuffed animal, so it smelled like him. Instantly felt better
4. Are you lonely right now?
Nah, I'm good
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
It depends on what. Usually it's my boyfriend or my best friend, sometimes it's my parents if I need some 'wizened words'.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
If I need a pick-me-up, I always go to Disney songs. Belle, songs from Moana, etc. But I also cannot listen to the Hamilton soundtrack without getting so into the raps.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Not a band, but more of a song. Bad Day by Daniel Powder is my sad song. My best friend played it when I was sleeping over at her house and I found out my grandpa died, many years ago when I was like twelve. Ever since then, it's been what I listen to as my sad mood song.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SO MANY THINGS.
Life man, life is anxiety. But really, I'm just kind of worried about being able to get to where I want to be. I want to get a new job, a better paying job, and be able to financially afford life as a normal person. Also, student loans are a constant stressor because I'm gonna be paying those off until/after I'm dead.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
I have a few methods. I try to find a moment to pray, to take my anxiety worries to God and find peace that He has it all under control. Then I'll snuggle kitties, or look at cute animal pictures, or find something physical to take my mind off it. I will also speak with someone like my boyfriend, to help confirm that my fears are unbased.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
I occasionally have nightmares, and honestly it ranges to a lot of things. Sometimes as wild as boarding an alien ship, othertimes as regular as my boyfriend breaking up with me. It's weird.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My family. I have an amazing family.
12. One regret?
Once upon a time, I was approached by an up-and-coming comic artist about storyboarding for his new comic book. I was only in my teens at the time, and I wasn't feeling all that 'inspired', so after a couple pages I told him that I was getting too busy and couldn't do it. Honestly, I just didn't wanna put the effort in. Now, I think about what an amazing opportunity that could have been, and I still kick myself for it sometimes. But I try to use it as a learning point, where it's like, 'okay, good opportunities are going to take a lot of effort'.
13. One thing you're proud of?
I'm honestly really proud of my writing, mainly my sci-fi trilogy.
14. One thing you wish?
I'm not going to get on a super deep spiritual level, and instead I'm going to say that I wish my trilogy was finished and completely edited already.
15. Virtual hugs?
Of course!
Sending hugs of support to everyone on here and in case you don't like hugs, a big pat on your shoulder, champ.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Being replaced and just watching it happen.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Few months ago actually, after I broke up with my boyfriend.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Roleplaying. I'm coping with my depression like this and it freaking works. If I can't roleplay, I'll either write or go out drinking with friends.
4. Are you lonely right now?
To be honest, no. I don't get lonely, I usually want to be left alone :') thankfully, I've wonderful people in my life, so I'm never feeling lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Either my lifelong friend to seek some comfort and advice, or my two friends to just be idiots and mindlessly waste time together messing around.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Heaven and Hell by Black Sabbath or I surrender by Rainbow
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Pantera, Gojira or Dead Can Dance
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Relationships. I am like an abused dog who can't find trust in humans to get a new happy home. It's impossible to get close to me in that context, I'll bite, no joke.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Shutting myself out completely.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
People dying or something unknown constantly lurking around.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People I'm surrounded with.
12. One regret?
I was good and naive to some people.
13. One thing you're proud of?
How I move on from things that attempt to beat me down.
14. One thing you wish?
I wish I was more crass to the people who deserved nothing more.
15. Virtual hugs?
Virtual hugs and pats on shoulders to those who don't like too much physical contact!
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Being replaced and just watching it happen.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Few months ago actually, after I broke up with my boyfriend.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Roleplaying. I'm coping with my depression like this and it freaking works. If I can't roleplay, I'll either write or go out drinking with friends.
4. Are you lonely right now?
To be honest, no. I don't get lonely, I usually want to be left alone :') thankfully, I've wonderful people in my life, so I'm never feeling lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Either my lifelong friend to seek some comfort and advice, or my two friends to just be idiots and mindlessly waste time together messing around.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Heaven and Hell by Black Sabbath or I surrender by Rainbow
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Pantera, Gojira or Dead Can Dance
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Relationships. I am like an abused dog who can't find trust in humans to get a new happy home. It's impossible to get close to me in that context, I'll bite, no joke.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Shutting myself out completely.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
People dying or something unknown constantly lurking around.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People I'm surrounded with.
12. One regret?
I was good and naive to some people.
13. One thing you're proud of?
How I move on from things that attempt to beat me down.
14. One thing you wish?
I wish I was more crass to the people who deserved nothing more.
15. Virtual hugs?
Virtual hugs and pats on shoulders to those who don't like too much physical contact!
Sanne wrote:
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Not being understood by my own parents and that I am not neurotypical and needed more help than I got. It set me up for a lot of failure as an adolescent that could have been avoided and made my life better if my needs had been recognized and met, rather than being dismissed and forced into a box that doesn't work for me. It's been 5 years or more since I got therapy to address the lifelong consequences of this.
While I probably have been emotionally hurt deeply by an individual, I think the impact from this has been so severe that it's worth being categorized as being hurt deeply.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Yesterday morning, after I woke up sick and in pain for the many-th day in a row and felt emotionally worn down from it! I try to cry often to process such feelings though.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My cats and my roommate!
4. Are you lonely right now?
Nope!
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I don't really call anyone on the phone. I mostly talk to people who understand my situation and/or feelings, which varies per person.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
I'm never in any particular mood for music. I do sometimes listen to sad, melodramatic or intense music to help validate my feelings (it's an alternative to crying for me).
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
No one band/musician or whatever. I mostly go for electronic music though.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
My health and finances. My situation is a bit complex right now, money is super tight and it's making everything ten times harder.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
I've applied techniques from cognitive behavioral therapy, but I've also discovered strains of marijuana that ease anxiety and depression without all the nasty side-effects from meds like Xanax.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
Sometimes, I usually don't remember what they're about though. I only know they're often about real-life events or feelings that I struggle to deal with.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
That I had the ability to grow and become a better person, despite the issues I faced as I was growing up. I'm grateful I better understand my privilege in life so that I can help others gain the same privileges (by eradicating inequality that is), and I'm grateful for negative experiences to help me understand how people work and how to recognize problematic behavior in myself as well.
I know it's technically more than one thing, but it feels related!
12. One regret?
Not having had more time, or making more time, to spend with my best friend before he died.
13. One thing you're proud of?
All the wonderful accomplishments and progress all of my friends have made! I know many of them have their own problems to deal with, and I can't help but always admire when they grow as individuals and move forward in life.
14. One thing you wish?
To not have disabilities.
15. Virtual hugs?
From you? Always!
Not being understood by my own parents and that I am not neurotypical and needed more help than I got. It set me up for a lot of failure as an adolescent that could have been avoided and made my life better if my needs had been recognized and met, rather than being dismissed and forced into a box that doesn't work for me. It's been 5 years or more since I got therapy to address the lifelong consequences of this.
While I probably have been emotionally hurt deeply by an individual, I think the impact from this has been so severe that it's worth being categorized as being hurt deeply.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Yesterday morning, after I woke up sick and in pain for the many-th day in a row and felt emotionally worn down from it! I try to cry often to process such feelings though.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My cats and my roommate!
4. Are you lonely right now?
Nope!
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I don't really call anyone on the phone. I mostly talk to people who understand my situation and/or feelings, which varies per person.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
I'm never in any particular mood for music. I do sometimes listen to sad, melodramatic or intense music to help validate my feelings (it's an alternative to crying for me).
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
No one band/musician or whatever. I mostly go for electronic music though.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
My health and finances. My situation is a bit complex right now, money is super tight and it's making everything ten times harder.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
I've applied techniques from cognitive behavioral therapy, but I've also discovered strains of marijuana that ease anxiety and depression without all the nasty side-effects from meds like Xanax.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
Sometimes, I usually don't remember what they're about though. I only know they're often about real-life events or feelings that I struggle to deal with.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
That I had the ability to grow and become a better person, despite the issues I faced as I was growing up. I'm grateful I better understand my privilege in life so that I can help others gain the same privileges (by eradicating inequality that is), and I'm grateful for negative experiences to help me understand how people work and how to recognize problematic behavior in myself as well.
I know it's technically more than one thing, but it feels related!
12. One regret?
Not having had more time, or making more time, to spend with my best friend before he died.
13. One thing you're proud of?
All the wonderful accomplishments and progress all of my friends have made! I know many of them have their own problems to deal with, and I can't help but always admire when they grow as individuals and move forward in life.
14. One thing you wish?
To not have disabilities.
15. Virtual hugs?
From you? Always!
Awwwwww, yay! I liked reading your answers. As always, I hope things get better and better for you my generous, kind friend.
((((Enormous Hugs!))))
CelestinaGrey wrote:
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
My sister not talking to me. She's not the most communicative person, but she messages her bff all the time and I never get a response from her. I've tried to initiate, and it's not that she outright ignores me I think, she just doesn't bother responding. So I've gone days, weeks, without ever hearing from her. Friends ask me "How's (little sister) doing?" and I have to respond with "I honestly don't know". It wrecks me sometimes because I really miss the close friendship we used to have.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Saturday, I got home from a busy weekend out and couldn't find my keys (we had taken my boyfriend's car). We looked everywhere, and I was so stressed out that I was just starting to cry even though I was trying to hold back. Thankfully, my amazing boyfriend found them shoved into a crack in the back seat (must have fallen out of my bag at some point), but it was SO stressful because I did not have a spare car key (I promptly went and got a copy made).
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My boyfriend, definitely. I have many friends/things that help me feel better, but just last night I was fretting over the storm rolling in (I hate storms), and he was texting me and he told me to hold my one stuffed animal, close my eyes, and take in a deep breath. I did, and I found out he had spritzed his cologne on that stuffed animal, so it smelled like him. Instantly felt better
4. Are you lonely right now?
Nah, I'm good
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
It depends on what. Usually it's my boyfriend or my best friend, sometimes it's my parents if I need some 'wizened words'.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
If I need a pick-me-up, I always go to Disney songs. Belle, songs from Moana, etc. But I also cannot listen to the Hamilton soundtrack without getting so into the raps.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Not a band, but more of a song. Bad Day by Daniel Powder is my sad song. My best friend played it when I was sleeping over at her house and I found out my grandpa died, many years ago when I was like twelve. Ever since then, it's been what I listen to as my sad mood song.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SO MANY THINGS.
Life man, life is anxiety. But really, I'm just kind of worried about being able to get to where I want to be. I want to get a new job, a better paying job, and be able to financially afford life as a normal person. Also, student loans are a constant stressor because I'm gonna be paying those off until/after I'm dead.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
I have a few methods. I try to find a moment to pray, to take my anxiety worries to God and find peace that He has it all under control. Then I'll snuggle kitties, or look at cute animal pictures, or find something physical to take my mind off it. I will also speak with someone like my boyfriend, to help confirm that my fears are unbased.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
I occasionally have nightmares, and honestly it ranges to a lot of things. Sometimes as wild as boarding an alien ship, othertimes as regular as my boyfriend breaking up with me. It's weird.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My family. I have an amazing family.
12. One regret?
Once upon a time, I was approached by an up-and-coming comic artist about storyboarding for his new comic book. I was only in my teens at the time, and I wasn't feeling all that 'inspired', so after a couple pages I told him that I was getting too busy and couldn't do it. Honestly, I just didn't wanna put the effort in. Now, I think about what an amazing opportunity that could have been, and I still kick myself for it sometimes. But I try to use it as a learning point, where it's like, 'okay, good opportunities are going to take a lot of effort'.
13. One thing you're proud of?
I'm honestly really proud of my writing, mainly my sci-fi trilogy.
14. One thing you wish?
I'm not going to get on a super deep spiritual level, and instead I'm going to say that I wish my trilogy was finished and completely edited already.
15. Virtual hugs?
Of course!
My sister not talking to me. She's not the most communicative person, but she messages her bff all the time and I never get a response from her. I've tried to initiate, and it's not that she outright ignores me I think, she just doesn't bother responding. So I've gone days, weeks, without ever hearing from her. Friends ask me "How's (little sister) doing?" and I have to respond with "I honestly don't know". It wrecks me sometimes because I really miss the close friendship we used to have.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Saturday, I got home from a busy weekend out and couldn't find my keys (we had taken my boyfriend's car). We looked everywhere, and I was so stressed out that I was just starting to cry even though I was trying to hold back. Thankfully, my amazing boyfriend found them shoved into a crack in the back seat (must have fallen out of my bag at some point), but it was SO stressful because I did not have a spare car key (I promptly went and got a copy made).
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My boyfriend, definitely. I have many friends/things that help me feel better, but just last night I was fretting over the storm rolling in (I hate storms), and he was texting me and he told me to hold my one stuffed animal, close my eyes, and take in a deep breath. I did, and I found out he had spritzed his cologne on that stuffed animal, so it smelled like him. Instantly felt better
4. Are you lonely right now?
Nah, I'm good
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
It depends on what. Usually it's my boyfriend or my best friend, sometimes it's my parents if I need some 'wizened words'.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
If I need a pick-me-up, I always go to Disney songs. Belle, songs from Moana, etc. But I also cannot listen to the Hamilton soundtrack without getting so into the raps.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Not a band, but more of a song. Bad Day by Daniel Powder is my sad song. My best friend played it when I was sleeping over at her house and I found out my grandpa died, many years ago when I was like twelve. Ever since then, it's been what I listen to as my sad mood song.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SO MANY THINGS.
Life man, life is anxiety. But really, I'm just kind of worried about being able to get to where I want to be. I want to get a new job, a better paying job, and be able to financially afford life as a normal person. Also, student loans are a constant stressor because I'm gonna be paying those off until/after I'm dead.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
I have a few methods. I try to find a moment to pray, to take my anxiety worries to God and find peace that He has it all under control. Then I'll snuggle kitties, or look at cute animal pictures, or find something physical to take my mind off it. I will also speak with someone like my boyfriend, to help confirm that my fears are unbased.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
I occasionally have nightmares, and honestly it ranges to a lot of things. Sometimes as wild as boarding an alien ship, othertimes as regular as my boyfriend breaking up with me. It's weird.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My family. I have an amazing family.
12. One regret?
Once upon a time, I was approached by an up-and-coming comic artist about storyboarding for his new comic book. I was only in my teens at the time, and I wasn't feeling all that 'inspired', so after a couple pages I told him that I was getting too busy and couldn't do it. Honestly, I just didn't wanna put the effort in. Now, I think about what an amazing opportunity that could have been, and I still kick myself for it sometimes. But I try to use it as a learning point, where it's like, 'okay, good opportunities are going to take a lot of effort'.
13. One thing you're proud of?
I'm honestly really proud of my writing, mainly my sci-fi trilogy.
14. One thing you wish?
I'm not going to get on a super deep spiritual level, and instead I'm going to say that I wish my trilogy was finished and completely edited already.
15. Virtual hugs?
Of course!
Yay! *Hugs Hugs Hugs,* Celestina!
I love than Daniel Powder song "Bad Day" too. It's one of mine too.
Yesss I love Disney songs too. Good pick me up. Hard to be in a bad mood while listening to "I can show you the world" from Aladdin or something.
I love it.Disney songs, and also the movie The Sound of Music never fails to put me in a good mood and also... watching the sit com Friends.
That story about your boyfriend with the stuffed animal? So sweet. So sweet.
Queen_of_Hell wrote:
Sending hugs of support to everyone on here and in case you don't like hugs, a big pat on your shoulder, champ.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Being replaced and just watching it happen.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Few months ago actually, after I broke up with my boyfriend.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Roleplaying. I'm coping with my depression like this and it freaking works. If I can't roleplay, I'll either write or go out drinking with friends.
4. Are you lonely right now?
To be honest, no. I don't get lonely, I usually want to be left alone :') thankfully, I've wonderful people in my life, so I'm never feeling lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Either my lifelong friend to seek some comfort and advice, or my two friends to just be idiots and mindlessly waste time together messing around.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Heaven and Hell by Black Sabbath or I surrender by Rainbow
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Pantera, Gojira or Dead Can Dance
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Relationships. I am like an abused dog who can't find trust in humans to get a new happy home. It's impossible to get close to me in that context, I'll bite, no joke.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Shutting myself out completely.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
People dying or something unknown constantly lurking around.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People I'm surrounded with.
12. One regret?
I was good and naive to some people.
13. One thing you're proud of?
How I move on from things that attempt to beat me down.
14. One thing you wish?
I wish I was more crass to the people who deserved nothing more.
15. Virtual hugs?
Virtual hugs and pats on shoulders to those who don't like too much physical contact!
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Being replaced and just watching it happen.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Few months ago actually, after I broke up with my boyfriend.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Roleplaying. I'm coping with my depression like this and it freaking works. If I can't roleplay, I'll either write or go out drinking with friends.
4. Are you lonely right now?
To be honest, no. I don't get lonely, I usually want to be left alone :') thankfully, I've wonderful people in my life, so I'm never feeling lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Either my lifelong friend to seek some comfort and advice, or my two friends to just be idiots and mindlessly waste time together messing around.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Heaven and Hell by Black Sabbath or I surrender by Rainbow
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Pantera, Gojira or Dead Can Dance
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Relationships. I am like an abused dog who can't find trust in humans to get a new happy home. It's impossible to get close to me in that context, I'll bite, no joke.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Shutting myself out completely.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
People dying or something unknown constantly lurking around.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People I'm surrounded with.
12. One regret?
I was good and naive to some people.
13. One thing you're proud of?
How I move on from things that attempt to beat me down.
14. One thing you wish?
I wish I was more crass to the people who deserved nothing more.
15. Virtual hugs?
Virtual hugs and pats on shoulders to those who don't like too much physical contact!
Well...I agree, I use role-playing to help me with depression too and yes it does freaking work. You got that right. It helps.
Sorry all that happened to you.
I would say hugs but I will say *hugs or a pat on the back* like you just did. I'm proud of you for being so reflective on your own emotions and knowing what's going on in there. That's half the battle, they say. For me role-playing helps me reflect on...and even sometimes discover...my emotions. I love it.
Thanks to everyone who responded. My heart is brimming over with gratitude that people can trust each other enough here to have real conversations, self-reflect, and lean on each other.
This is a really great survey.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Coming up to the age of 31 in November, I mean, life can throw you some hurtful curveballs. I think the most prominent has to be my non-existent relationship with my mother. Though I will say that while it has hurt me and plagued me in the past, I'm finally at the point where I no longer feel the need to seek her approval or acceptance for anything. I see her manipulation and behaviour for what it is; projected self-hatred. I feel .. bad for her. She's lost her only child, and she's surrounded by beautiful things in a beautiful house, she doesn't have to work anymore due to her inheritance, and she's forever unsatisfied. That must suck.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
I cried a few days ago, because I woke up thinking about how much I miss my Papa. He died last year in late July. That man was a diamond of a person.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My Papa, even though he isn't here anymore, thinking of what he has taught me and memories always helps. As does my husband, and my best friend.
4. Are you lonely right now?
Not at all.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I'm blessed to usually only have to turn around in my chair, or venture around the house in search of my husband.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
The most recent ones have been 'B*tch, I'm Madonna' and 'Side to side'. No joke.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Loreena McKennitt, I suppose?
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
I am anxious to get back to work. I have been on a leave of absence for too long, and just as soon as I started going back, I woke up randomly with appendicitis.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
White healing light meditation, listening to 'empowering' music and going for a walk down to the ocean.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
I have nightmares often, but they always change, and ironically, despite them being somewhat horrific, usually only mean change is on the way or that I'm in the thick of it. It can entail death of others in front of me, or myself, but it happens so often now that it somewhat dulls the nightmare factor down.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
Literature. It has saved me so many times, most especially when growing up. If I could name one thing as a safety blanket, it would most certainly be my books. But it's deeper than just literature. It also taught me to enjoy my time alone, with myself, with my thoughts. I find that quite a few people have issues with this, and I am glad that I don't.
12. One regret?
That I gave my power away to my ex-boyfriend to such a degree. With time, my husband and self-analysis, I've realized that I am so much better than what he gave me credit for, and I am still in the thick of learning that I don't require others to acknowledge my good for it to mean that I am good. I can be a genuinely good person whether people see it or not, I mean well. I am capable of good and helping others. I am nurturing, and I need to nurture myself more, cut myself some slack. My ex really trampled any light in this area for me, but ultimately, I let it continue by staying with them. I couldn't more happy though that we separated and for where I am today.
13. One thing you're proud of?
Stepping out to take risks. Being honest and just going for things. It may not be all the time, but damn, when I do: yes!
14. One thing you wish?
.. I wish that I pass after my husband. It will be terrible to lose him. However, I want to be there for as much and as long as possible. He has shown me ways to improve, been a rock for me when I lost my Papa, and that happened only 2 months after we got married. He has given me so much, and I want as much time as possible to thank him for simply being him.
15. Virtual hugs?
Sometimes? But after being so open, I'm going to keep my hands around my coffee cup. Thank you, though.
P.ost S.cript: Thanks Abigail for writing this up and getting this ball rolling.
Coming up to the age of 31 in November, I mean, life can throw you some hurtful curveballs. I think the most prominent has to be my non-existent relationship with my mother. Though I will say that while it has hurt me and plagued me in the past, I'm finally at the point where I no longer feel the need to seek her approval or acceptance for anything. I see her manipulation and behaviour for what it is; projected self-hatred. I feel .. bad for her. She's lost her only child, and she's surrounded by beautiful things in a beautiful house, she doesn't have to work anymore due to her inheritance, and she's forever unsatisfied. That must suck.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
I cried a few days ago, because I woke up thinking about how much I miss my Papa. He died last year in late July. That man was a diamond of a person.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My Papa, even though he isn't here anymore, thinking of what he has taught me and memories always helps. As does my husband, and my best friend.
4. Are you lonely right now?
Not at all.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I'm blessed to usually only have to turn around in my chair, or venture around the house in search of my husband.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
The most recent ones have been 'B*tch, I'm Madonna' and 'Side to side'. No joke.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Loreena McKennitt, I suppose?
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
I am anxious to get back to work. I have been on a leave of absence for too long, and just as soon as I started going back, I woke up randomly with appendicitis.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
White healing light meditation, listening to 'empowering' music and going for a walk down to the ocean.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
I have nightmares often, but they always change, and ironically, despite them being somewhat horrific, usually only mean change is on the way or that I'm in the thick of it. It can entail death of others in front of me, or myself, but it happens so often now that it somewhat dulls the nightmare factor down.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
Literature. It has saved me so many times, most especially when growing up. If I could name one thing as a safety blanket, it would most certainly be my books. But it's deeper than just literature. It also taught me to enjoy my time alone, with myself, with my thoughts. I find that quite a few people have issues with this, and I am glad that I don't.
12. One regret?
That I gave my power away to my ex-boyfriend to such a degree. With time, my husband and self-analysis, I've realized that I am so much better than what he gave me credit for, and I am still in the thick of learning that I don't require others to acknowledge my good for it to mean that I am good. I can be a genuinely good person whether people see it or not, I mean well. I am capable of good and helping others. I am nurturing, and I need to nurture myself more, cut myself some slack. My ex really trampled any light in this area for me, but ultimately, I let it continue by staying with them. I couldn't more happy though that we separated and for where I am today.
13. One thing you're proud of?
Stepping out to take risks. Being honest and just going for things. It may not be all the time, but damn, when I do: yes!
14. One thing you wish?
.. I wish that I pass after my husband. It will be terrible to lose him. However, I want to be there for as much and as long as possible. He has shown me ways to improve, been a rock for me when I lost my Papa, and that happened only 2 months after we got married. He has given me so much, and I want as much time as possible to thank him for simply being him.
15. Virtual hugs?
Sometimes? But after being so open, I'm going to keep my hands around my coffee cup. Thank you, though.
P.ost S.cript: Thanks Abigail for writing this up and getting this ball rolling.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
If I were to try and sum this up in to very general words; the people I trusted most. Whether it was an ex-boyfriend who took advantage of me at a very young age, being told by ex-boyfriends that I should be hurt by how much I hurt them for standing up for myself, being used as an actual object for their needs, my parents for raising me to believe that I was an annoying, worthless, waste of energy. People I considered friends who abandoned me because of who I have fallen in love with. People who did not respect my boundaries and were more concerned with their own feelings than mine and started to make me believe that how I felt didn't matter, or that I was wrong for wanting a boundary in the first place. People who I have trusted most have hurt me the worst out of anything.
However, I have also been my worst enemy. Despite everything that all of these people have put me through, I have hurt myself the most. I have believed hateful words, pushed myself through situations that I did not need to be in, and allowed people to have power over me just so I could see them be happy. I have denied myself my own happiness the most and that is something I must also learn to forgive myself for doing too. I have taught myself to believe the lie that I am "not worthy," "annoying," "hateful," and the worst lie of all being that I didn't "deserve to be loved." I am still learning to stop hating myself and being hurtful to myself.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Yesterday. I woke up feeling worthless and confused. The past few days I have received a gracious amount of praise and adoration from my co-workers for how well I can teach others how to do their jobs. How I can show them patience, explain thoroughly, and guide them step by step through the process of the work. I have received this praise from my boss, my supervisors, and my team-mates. I felt so overwhelmed with the knowledge of their appreciation and beliefs in me that I asked myself, "why though?" And the truth is, I did not need to know why, because it is true. I am a good worker and a great teacher in many regards. However, I woke up to cry and feel swallowed in my own self-doubts. Instead of feeling good about the praise I have received I was feeling horrible and as though I was not worth this praise. I am still struggling with it, but rationally I know the truth.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My husband, my best friend, music, and video games. Being able to let go of the worries that are ingrained inside my body by distraction and affirmations have been the best medicine.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I either fall on top of my husband and bleed my heart out on him, or phone my Nana.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Ironically sad music? I listen to a lot of pop music, Celtic inspired music, slower songs and love songs. I think that it is possible that my listening to sad music might not be the best solution, but I often find sad message songs to be some of the most beautiful to listen to on a general basis.
7. What's your favourite "sad mood" band?
Halsey or Sam Smith at this time.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
It wouldn't be considered in the future, but money? Without going in to too much details; my husband and I are in an alarming amount of debt. This debt is really only alarming to myself and him, but that is what it is. I am anxious about making enough money to climb our way out of debt and to begin saving money. I'm anxious about things happening that could hinder our ability to keep climbing. However, I can honestly see a light at the end of the tunnel, but I'm terrified of falling deeper into the hole.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
This is something my husband taught me. When I'm feeling anxious about events, day to day duties, or future plans... I make a list. I mentally make a list of all the things I need to have done, be prepared for, and take care of and find which ones I can solve right away. To the things that I cannot work on right now but can work toward, I put them aside to accomplish what can be settled right away. This helps me feel satisfied with an accomplishment and also enforces the fact that not everything needs to be done right away. Things will fall in to place where they should so long as you are approaching it with a positive mind-set, prepare yourself to keep moving if they don't solve themselves when you want them to, and to not give up on making an effort to fix things.
Realizing what really takes time to be worked on and handling things that are simple and have immediate solutions is a great way to handle my anxiety. If I can't pay a bill right now, I know I can work towards a goal of paying it a little bit later. If I don't know if someone likes me or not, I can approach them and even express my feelings of self-doubt in a gentle, but open manor to speak with them. This can open up so much for people to talk about, and if people are honest with me, I'll know just how much they like me or if they just don't know yet.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
My nightmares are usually spread out, but they're generally around the same issues. I am terrified of letting people in to my life after several events in the past. I have nightmares about people breaking in to my home and hurting me or my husband. This usually comes in the form of angry people, angry animals, zombies, or your typical thugs and murderers. I know that this means I am feeling vulnerable with someone or I am feeling overwhelmed in my outer life because my outer life is fighting its way into my inner life.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
I can't pin it down as one single thing. I am grateful for crochet, roleplaying, video games, and writing. I am thankful for my husband for teaching me so much about how to love myself. I am thankful for my Nana for being my rock when I had no one else. I am thankful for the life I have and the experiences I have been through that have shaped me in to the kind, caring, and honest person that I am today.
12. One regret?
I refuse to regret. I learned from my experiences, my choices, the people I chose to let be around me, and the life I have lived thus far. I am thankful for the risks I have taken and the failures too. I learned first from my Nana that you cannot let yourself regret what you are doing. You cannot let "what ifs" control the steps it takes to try and make your life the happiest life you can make it. Regret is a thing to try and hold someone back from succeeding in their happiness.
On a light note; I regret not buying more reese's peanut butter cups. I'm craving them now. lol
13. One thing you're proud of?
I am... this is the hardest thing for me to do for myself sometimes. I am proud of... my compassion. My compassion is overwhelming, turbulent, vicious, and violent. I am proud of it because it really is who I am.
14. One thing you wish?
I wish I did not hate myself as much as I do. I wish I could overpower that hate in a single effort, but I know that is totally unrealistic. It will take time and extreme effort.
15. Virtual hugs?
I prefer not to receive them. I personally just like it when someone shares foods, offers pop, or sends me nice energy. Thank you for offering up this survey. It's really lovely and has helped me further through my process. It feels nice to open up to the void without expectation.
If I were to try and sum this up in to very general words; the people I trusted most. Whether it was an ex-boyfriend who took advantage of me at a very young age, being told by ex-boyfriends that I should be hurt by how much I hurt them for standing up for myself, being used as an actual object for their needs, my parents for raising me to believe that I was an annoying, worthless, waste of energy. People I considered friends who abandoned me because of who I have fallen in love with. People who did not respect my boundaries and were more concerned with their own feelings than mine and started to make me believe that how I felt didn't matter, or that I was wrong for wanting a boundary in the first place. People who I have trusted most have hurt me the worst out of anything.
However, I have also been my worst enemy. Despite everything that all of these people have put me through, I have hurt myself the most. I have believed hateful words, pushed myself through situations that I did not need to be in, and allowed people to have power over me just so I could see them be happy. I have denied myself my own happiness the most and that is something I must also learn to forgive myself for doing too. I have taught myself to believe the lie that I am "not worthy," "annoying," "hateful," and the worst lie of all being that I didn't "deserve to be loved." I am still learning to stop hating myself and being hurtful to myself.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Yesterday. I woke up feeling worthless and confused. The past few days I have received a gracious amount of praise and adoration from my co-workers for how well I can teach others how to do their jobs. How I can show them patience, explain thoroughly, and guide them step by step through the process of the work. I have received this praise from my boss, my supervisors, and my team-mates. I felt so overwhelmed with the knowledge of their appreciation and beliefs in me that I asked myself, "why though?" And the truth is, I did not need to know why, because it is true. I am a good worker and a great teacher in many regards. However, I woke up to cry and feel swallowed in my own self-doubts. Instead of feeling good about the praise I have received I was feeling horrible and as though I was not worth this praise. I am still struggling with it, but rationally I know the truth.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
My husband, my best friend, music, and video games. Being able to let go of the worries that are ingrained inside my body by distraction and affirmations have been the best medicine.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I either fall on top of my husband and bleed my heart out on him, or phone my Nana.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Ironically sad music? I listen to a lot of pop music, Celtic inspired music, slower songs and love songs. I think that it is possible that my listening to sad music might not be the best solution, but I often find sad message songs to be some of the most beautiful to listen to on a general basis.
7. What's your favourite "sad mood" band?
Halsey or Sam Smith at this time.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
It wouldn't be considered in the future, but money? Without going in to too much details; my husband and I are in an alarming amount of debt. This debt is really only alarming to myself and him, but that is what it is. I am anxious about making enough money to climb our way out of debt and to begin saving money. I'm anxious about things happening that could hinder our ability to keep climbing. However, I can honestly see a light at the end of the tunnel, but I'm terrified of falling deeper into the hole.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
This is something my husband taught me. When I'm feeling anxious about events, day to day duties, or future plans... I make a list. I mentally make a list of all the things I need to have done, be prepared for, and take care of and find which ones I can solve right away. To the things that I cannot work on right now but can work toward, I put them aside to accomplish what can be settled right away. This helps me feel satisfied with an accomplishment and also enforces the fact that not everything needs to be done right away. Things will fall in to place where they should so long as you are approaching it with a positive mind-set, prepare yourself to keep moving if they don't solve themselves when you want them to, and to not give up on making an effort to fix things.
Realizing what really takes time to be worked on and handling things that are simple and have immediate solutions is a great way to handle my anxiety. If I can't pay a bill right now, I know I can work towards a goal of paying it a little bit later. If I don't know if someone likes me or not, I can approach them and even express my feelings of self-doubt in a gentle, but open manor to speak with them. This can open up so much for people to talk about, and if people are honest with me, I'll know just how much they like me or if they just don't know yet.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
My nightmares are usually spread out, but they're generally around the same issues. I am terrified of letting people in to my life after several events in the past. I have nightmares about people breaking in to my home and hurting me or my husband. This usually comes in the form of angry people, angry animals, zombies, or your typical thugs and murderers. I know that this means I am feeling vulnerable with someone or I am feeling overwhelmed in my outer life because my outer life is fighting its way into my inner life.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
I can't pin it down as one single thing. I am grateful for crochet, roleplaying, video games, and writing. I am thankful for my husband for teaching me so much about how to love myself. I am thankful for my Nana for being my rock when I had no one else. I am thankful for the life I have and the experiences I have been through that have shaped me in to the kind, caring, and honest person that I am today.
12. One regret?
I refuse to regret. I learned from my experiences, my choices, the people I chose to let be around me, and the life I have lived thus far. I am thankful for the risks I have taken and the failures too. I learned first from my Nana that you cannot let yourself regret what you are doing. You cannot let "what ifs" control the steps it takes to try and make your life the happiest life you can make it. Regret is a thing to try and hold someone back from succeeding in their happiness.
On a light note; I regret not buying more reese's peanut butter cups. I'm craving them now. lol
13. One thing you're proud of?
I am... this is the hardest thing for me to do for myself sometimes. I am proud of... my compassion. My compassion is overwhelming, turbulent, vicious, and violent. I am proud of it because it really is who I am.
14. One thing you wish?
I wish I did not hate myself as much as I do. I wish I could overpower that hate in a single effort, but I know that is totally unrealistic. It will take time and extreme effort.
15. Virtual hugs?
I prefer not to receive them. I personally just like it when someone shares foods, offers pop, or sends me nice energy.
Thank you for offering up this survey. It's really lovely and has helped me further through my process. It feels nice to open up to the void without expectation.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
4. Are you lonely right now?
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
12. One regret?
13. One thing you're proud of?
14. One thing you wish?
15. Virtual hugs?
See more
Like, deeply deeply? ...There's actually two things that hurt me so much, it affected my views on friendship.
The first was when an ex-friend called me a heartless [insert vulger term for female dog here] when I pointed out to them that it was better to focus on a group RP we were in rather than rail off topic because their cat ran off (and came back later). I was trying to help them relax because they were so worried about it, and they thought I didn't care for them and never had. Even as I put my heart and tears on the line to apologize and try and salvage things, they turned me away. They ditched me as a friend, which shattered my spirit. The other trials they put me through later on in hopes of reconciling our long-broken friendship only added to the pain.
The second thing is that I was called a toxic person by someone who was the literal definition of a toxic person. They were my last chance at making a friend, and I had started to like them a lot despite the violent warning signs and red flags they kept sending to me. They blew up over me having to set a boundary for myself, and they ended up calling me toxic in the end.
After that, I stopped trying to make new friends. I'm better off just being myself and not chasing down hopeful friendships. Letting things happen as they are feels more and more like a better option as the days go by.
The first was when an ex-friend called me a heartless [insert vulger term for female dog here] when I pointed out to them that it was better to focus on a group RP we were in rather than rail off topic because their cat ran off (and came back later). I was trying to help them relax because they were so worried about it, and they thought I didn't care for them and never had. Even as I put my heart and tears on the line to apologize and try and salvage things, they turned me away. They ditched me as a friend, which shattered my spirit. The other trials they put me through later on in hopes of reconciling our long-broken friendship only added to the pain.
The second thing is that I was called a toxic person by someone who was the literal definition of a toxic person. They were my last chance at making a friend, and I had started to like them a lot despite the violent warning signs and red flags they kept sending to me. They blew up over me having to set a boundary for myself, and they ended up calling me toxic in the end.
After that, I stopped trying to make new friends. I'm better off just being myself and not chasing down hopeful friendships. Letting things happen as they are feels more and more like a better option as the days go by.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
See more
While playing Lugia's Song. Someone had suggested it as a theme song for my Merrin, and after listening to it, I started crying. The mental imagery of my character waking up the world again with her staff in hand was so beautiful, it ended up breaking my heart.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
See more
Not much aside from talking with my beloved Lily. Laying down is a nice secondary option.
4. Are you lonely right now?
See more
Yes, very much so. Very much so...
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
See more
Again, my beloved Lily. He really helps me through a lot of things in his own way.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
See more
I don't listen to music much when I get sad... If I do, then it's a variety of music that I pull from YouTube or my massive playlist of songs.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
See more
Refer to answer number 6, please. However, I will note that I do stumble over Vocaloid songs more than not, if that counts.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
See more
That I will always be lonely. I am miles away from the one or two people who care about me, and outside of my two long-distance relations, I'm all alone in a strange city by myself. No friends, no family, just me in my apartment... Alone. I'm afraid that if something happens, I will lose whatever sanity I have left and shut myself away from people even more than I've started to now.
Though a more mundane yet still crippling worry is the student loan debt that I've racked up for myself when I was young and stupid. It's not as bad as all that, but I don't have a job. I also have few steady income sources, so I'm at a loss for what I can do right now outside of opening commissions. (And I have no confidence in that either, so it's been placed on the back burner every time I think of it as an option.)
Though a more mundane yet still crippling worry is the student loan debt that I've racked up for myself when I was young and stupid. It's not as bad as all that, but I don't have a job. I also have few steady income sources, so I'm at a loss for what I can do right now outside of opening commissions. (And I have no confidence in that either, so it's been placed on the back burner every time I think of it as an option.)
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
See more
Well, ignoring it is one way. I know it's not good, but it does help. Solving the issue the best way I can, or trying to convince myself that sometimes things will go out of my control and it's not my fault also helps a bit. Sleep is also an option that helps whenever I stop my mind from racing a mile a minute.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
See more
Yes, sometimes. A few dreams stem around me and my mother fighting, and/or one of us killing the other. My nightmares are overall violent and involve me hurting someone or running away from/fighting against someone who's hurting me.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
See more
Living. I think that's the only thing I am grateful for from the bottom of my heart. Otherwise, everything I've seen with my own eyes would have no witnesses, you know?
12. One regret?
See more
...I have a list. You're gonna have to be more specific about what kind of regret to mention.
13. One thing you're proud of?
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Few things come to mind when I think of what I could be proud of... Huh. Well... Being able to live as long as I have without succumbing to suicide, and realizing that taking my own life is not worth sacrificing what good I've already done in the world. I'm proud of that more than anything.
14. One thing you wish?
See more
To have a successful polyamorous triad that lasts throughout my entire life. ...A tangible wish? ...To be more social, in all honesty.
15. Virtual hugs?
See more
...I'm not in the mood to be touched right now, virtual or otherwise. Thanks anyway, though; I appreciate it.
Now if you sent me a cheesecake, that's a different story. I love cheesecake.
Now if you sent me a cheesecake, that's a different story. I love cheesecake.
wrote:
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
4. Are you lonely right now?
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
12. One regret?
13. One thing you're proud of?
14. One thing you wish?
15. Virtual hugs?
See more
Like, deeply deeply? ...There's actually two things that hurt me so much, it affected my views on friendship.
The first was when an ex-friend called me a heartless [insert vulger term for female dog here] when I pointed out to them that it was better to focus on a group RP we were in rather than rail off topic because their cat ran off (and came back later). I was trying to help them relax because they were so worried about it, and they thought I didn't care for them and never had. Even as I put my heart and tears on the line to apologize and try and salvage things, they turned me away. They ditched me as a friend, which shattered my spirit. The other trials they put me through later on in hopes of reconciling our long-broken friendship only added to the pain.
The second thing is that I was called a toxic person by someone who was the literal definition of a toxic person. They were my last chance at making a friend, and I had started to like them a lot despite the violent warning signs and red flags they kept sending to me. They blew up over me having to set a boundary for myself, and they ended up calling me toxic in the end.
After that, I stopped trying to make new friends. I'm better off just being myself and not chasing down hopeful friendships. Letting things happen as they are feels more and more like a better option as the days go by.
The first was when an ex-friend called me a heartless [insert vulger term for female dog here] when I pointed out to them that it was better to focus on a group RP we were in rather than rail off topic because their cat ran off (and came back later). I was trying to help them relax because they were so worried about it, and they thought I didn't care for them and never had. Even as I put my heart and tears on the line to apologize and try and salvage things, they turned me away. They ditched me as a friend, which shattered my spirit. The other trials they put me through later on in hopes of reconciling our long-broken friendship only added to the pain.
The second thing is that I was called a toxic person by someone who was the literal definition of a toxic person. They were my last chance at making a friend, and I had started to like them a lot despite the violent warning signs and red flags they kept sending to me. They blew up over me having to set a boundary for myself, and they ended up calling me toxic in the end.
After that, I stopped trying to make new friends. I'm better off just being myself and not chasing down hopeful friendships. Letting things happen as they are feels more and more like a better option as the days go by.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
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While playing Lugia's Song. Someone had suggested it as a theme song for my Merrin, and after listening to it, I started crying. The mental imagery of my character waking up the world again with her staff in hand was so beautiful, it ended up breaking my heart.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
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Not much aside from talking with my beloved Lily. Laying down is a nice secondary option.
4. Are you lonely right now?
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Yes, very much so. Very much so...
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
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Again, my beloved Lily. He really helps me through a lot of things in his own way.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
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I don't really listen to music much when I get sad... If I do, it's mostly a variety of music that I pull from YouTube or something.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
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Look to number 6, please. However, I will note that I do stumble over Vocaloid songs more than not, if that counts.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
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That I will always be lonely. I am miles away from the one or two people who care about me, and outside of my two long-distance relations, I'm completely alone in a strange city by myself. No friends, no family, just me in my apartment... Alone. I'm afraid that if something happens, I will lose whatever sanity I have left and shut myself away from people even more than I've started to now.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
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Well, ignoring it is one way. I know it's not good, but it does help. Solving the issue the best way I can, or trying to convince myself that sometimes things will go out of my control and it's not my fault also helps a bit. Sleep is also an option that helps whenever I stop my mind from racing a mile a minute.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
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Yes, sometimes. A few dreams stem around me and my mother fighting, and/or one of us killing the other. My nightmares are overall violent and involve me hurting someone or running away from/fighting against someone who's hurting me.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
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Living. I think that's the only thing I am grateful for from the bottom of my heart. Otherwise, everything I've seen with my own eyes would have no witnesses, you know?
12. One regret?
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...I have a list. You're gonna have to be more specific about what kind of regret to mention.
13. One thing you're proud of?
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Few things come to mind when I think of what I could be proud of... Huh. Well... Being able to live as long as I have without succumbing to suicide. I'm proud of that more than anything.
14. One thing you wish?
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To have a successful poly triad that lasts throughout my entire life. ...A tangible wish? ...To be more social, in all honesty.
15. Virtual hugs?
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...I'm not in the mood to be touched right now, virtually or otherwise. Thanks anyway, though; I appreciate it.
Now if you sent me a cheesecake, that's a different story. I love cheesecake.
Now if you sent me a cheesecake, that's a different story. I love cheesecake.
*Sends LightSide-Lucree a cheesecake*
Never in a million years did I think I'd find myself doing this, but anyways.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
I grew up in an abusive alcoholic household that was in constant financial crisis. It could've been worse, but it still shaped me fundamentally.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
This is lame but it was when I was thinking about how I have to leave my cats behind when I go back to university lmao.
Aside from that it's been years since I've cried. Which isn't a good thing. @anyone reading this crying is normal and healthy and you should let yourself cry sometimes.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Walking aimlessly for hours.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No, I don't seem to get lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Nobody, and that's likely part of the problem lmao.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Nothing in particular.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Eh.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Well, in one year university's going to spit me out into the ""real world"" with absolutely no ambitions or interests, a worthless degree, and in crippling debt. I'm worried I've boxed myself in and I'm going to get stuck working a dead end job in my dead end hometown. Although I think that's basically every student's fear. I don't have the money to fix a mistake this big.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Idk aside from that I don't experience much anxiety or any other emotion, I'm burned out.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
No.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
Sleep.
12. One regret?
University.
13. One thing you're proud of?
All things considered I think I keep it together pretty well.
14. One thing you wish?
I hope everyone else's lives turn out the way they wanted.
15. Virtual hugs?
I'm not a hugger, but I appreciate the sentiment.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
I grew up in an abusive alcoholic household that was in constant financial crisis. It could've been worse, but it still shaped me fundamentally.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
This is lame but it was when I was thinking about how I have to leave my cats behind when I go back to university lmao.
Aside from that it's been years since I've cried. Which isn't a good thing. @anyone reading this crying is normal and healthy and you should let yourself cry sometimes.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Walking aimlessly for hours.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No, I don't seem to get lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Nobody, and that's likely part of the problem lmao.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Nothing in particular.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Eh.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Well, in one year university's going to spit me out into the ""real world"" with absolutely no ambitions or interests, a worthless degree, and in crippling debt. I'm worried I've boxed myself in and I'm going to get stuck working a dead end job in my dead end hometown. Although I think that's basically every student's fear. I don't have the money to fix a mistake this big.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Idk aside from that I don't experience much anxiety or any other emotion, I'm burned out.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
No.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
Sleep.
12. One regret?
University.
13. One thing you're proud of?
All things considered I think I keep it together pretty well.
14. One thing you wish?
I hope everyone else's lives turn out the way they wanted.
15. Virtual hugs?
I'm not a hugger, but I appreciate the sentiment.
Yersinia wrote:
Never in a million years did I think I'd find myself doing this, but anyways.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
I grew up in an abusive alcoholic household that was in constant financial crisis. It could've been worse, but it still shaped me fundamentally.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
This is lame but it was when I was thinking about how I have to leave my cats behind when I go back to university lmao.
Aside from that it's been years since I've cried. Which isn't a good thing. @anyone reading this crying is normal and healthy and you should let yourself cry sometimes.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Walking aimlessly for hours.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No, I don't seem to get lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Nobody, and that's likely part of the problem lmao.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Nothing in particular.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Eh.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Well, in one year university's going to spit me out into the ""real world"" with absolutely no ambitions or interests and in crippling debt, which I'm psyched for. I'm worried I'll get trapped in my tiny dead end hometown, that I'll always be poor, and that I'm going to be stuck working some job I hate until the day I die. Although I think that's basically every student's fear.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Idk aside from that I don't experience much anxiety anymore.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
No.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
Sleep.
12. One regret?
University.
13. One thing you're proud of?
I mean all things considered I think I keep it together pretty well.
14. One thing you wish?
ah
15. Virtual hugs?
I'm not a hugger, but I appreciate the sentiment.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
I grew up in an abusive alcoholic household that was in constant financial crisis. It could've been worse, but it still shaped me fundamentally.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
This is lame but it was when I was thinking about how I have to leave my cats behind when I go back to university lmao.
Aside from that it's been years since I've cried. Which isn't a good thing. @anyone reading this crying is normal and healthy and you should let yourself cry sometimes.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Walking aimlessly for hours.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No, I don't seem to get lonely.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
Nobody, and that's likely part of the problem lmao.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Nothing in particular.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Eh.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Well, in one year university's going to spit me out into the ""real world"" with absolutely no ambitions or interests and in crippling debt, which I'm psyched for. I'm worried I'll get trapped in my tiny dead end hometown, that I'll always be poor, and that I'm going to be stuck working some job I hate until the day I die. Although I think that's basically every student's fear.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Idk aside from that I don't experience much anxiety anymore.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
No.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
Sleep.
12. One regret?
University.
13. One thing you're proud of?
I mean all things considered I think I keep it together pretty well.
14. One thing you wish?
ah
15. Virtual hugs?
I'm not a hugger, but I appreciate the sentiment.
Well thank you for filling out my little survey, and I enjoyed reading your answers. Yeah...college seems overrated sometimes, I know. I don't regret my bachelor's degree, but the master's degree...probably a waste of time for me. But here's hoping the real world has a niche for whatever you'll have your degree in. Not everyone is eloquent and literate, so...there's that.
1.What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
When two of my friends pranked me to think one of them died... I was scarred for life. I even had to bring a THERAPY PILLOW to school.
2.When's the last time you cried and why?
As I'm answering this, because I'm remembering the trauma from the first question I answered..
EDIT: I thought I was going to cry, but, as always, I just couldn't do it. So, new answer:
Who knows?
3.Who/what makes you feel better when you're sad?
Cats and ANY FORM OF HUGS. Along with making myself into a tiny little blanket burrito and hugging my precious 'Kitty' (my favourite stuffed animal, DON'T JUDGE ME....)
4.Are you lonely right now?
Oh, OF COURSE NOT. I'm obviously not lonely AT ALL.... Naw, I'm EXTREMELY lonely rn.
5.Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
No one. Although I may at times seem needy and vulnerable on this site, I'm quite the opposite IRL. I feel as if I just can't let anyone IRL know that there's something wrong.... I don't know why, but that's how I feel.
6.What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Hmm... What's the use of music when I can't hear it over my own depressed thoughts?
7.What's your favourite 'sad mood' band?
Yet again....
8.Anxious about anything in the future you'd like to talk about?
Oh, definitely. But Gail already knows....
9.What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Venting to people on here.... I don't vent for attention, or out of expectation that people can magically fix my problems.... I do it because I HAVE TO LET IT OUT. If I don't, I will suddenly blow up at those of whom I love/care about...
10.Do you have nightmares and about what?
Yes. And, if you would like to know what about, Gail, please PM me about it....
11.What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People like Gail.
12.One regret?
Only ONE?....
13.One thing you're proud of?
( I know this is two, but it's practically the ONLY TWO... ) The novel I'm writing, and the fact that I haven't kicked the bucket yet. ( Not just from suicide, I also mean because of my poor health. ;n; )
14.One thing you wish?
Hmm... Maybe to actually KNOW WHAT TO DO for once, instead of having practically no way to know what's right????
15.Virtual Hugs?
ALWAYS. If I DON'T want one, THERE IS SOMETHING EXTREEEEEEEMELY WRONG AND YOU SHOULD GET A DEPRESSION PROFESSIONALIST FOR ME OR SOMETHING. OR A PSYCHIATRIST FOR ME.
When two of my friends pranked me to think one of them died... I was scarred for life. I even had to bring a THERAPY PILLOW to school.
2.When's the last time you cried and why?
As I'm answering this, because I'm remembering the trauma from the first question I answered.
.EDIT: I thought I was going to cry, but, as always, I just couldn't do it. So, new answer:
Who knows?
3.Who/what makes you feel better when you're sad?
Cats and ANY FORM OF HUGS. Along with making myself into a tiny little blanket burrito and hugging my precious 'Kitty' (my favourite stuffed animal, DON'T JUDGE ME....)
4.Are you lonely right now?
Oh, OF COURSE NOT. I'm obviously not lonely AT ALL.... Naw, I'm EXTREMELY lonely rn.
5.Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
No one.
Although I may at times seem needy and vulnerable on this site, I'm quite the opposite IRL. I feel as if I just can't let anyone IRL know that there's something wrong.... I don't know why, but that's how I feel.6.What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Hmm... What's the use of music when I can't hear it over my own depressed thoughts?
7.What's your favourite 'sad mood' band?
Yet again....
8.Anxious about anything in the future you'd like to talk about?
Oh, definitely. But Gail already knows....
9.What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Venting to people on here.... I don't vent for attention, or out of expectation that people can magically fix my problems.... I do it because I HAVE TO LET IT OUT. If I don't, I will suddenly blow up at those of whom I love/care about...
10.Do you have nightmares and about what?
Yes. And, if you would like to know what about, Gail, please PM me about it....
11.What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People like Gail.
12.One regret?
Only ONE?....
13.One thing you're proud of?
( I know this is two, but it's practically the ONLY TWO... ) The novel I'm writing, and the fact that I haven't kicked the bucket yet. ( Not just from suicide, I also mean because of my poor health. ;n; )
14.One thing you wish?
Hmm... Maybe to actually KNOW WHAT TO DO for once, instead of having practically no way to know what's right????
15.Virtual Hugs?
ALWAYS. If I DON'T want one, THERE IS SOMETHING EXTREEEEEEEMELY WRONG AND YOU SHOULD GET A DEPRESSION PROFESSIONALIST FOR ME OR SOMETHING. OR A PSYCHIATRIST FOR ME.
honestly i did this but i didn’t talk about anything people dom’t already know about me and any time i try to talk about my feelings i just make it very shallow and make jokes to make it easier for myself but that’s probably my problem because it’s so hard for me to be genuinely vulnerable so
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
abusive stepdad that had me trying to kill myself multiple times when i was ten years old. when my mom broke up with him he beat her and then stalked us to the point my grandpa had to come sleep on the couch with a shotgun. and when i say this hurt me deeply, i mean that this literally ruined my life and i would be a completely different person if it didn’t happen. so. it’s this old pain i wish i was just numb to by now but. yeah. i still have to see/hear him because he’s my youngest sisters dad and every time he comes over it results in me having panic attacks and crying while hiding in my room which, like, makes me think of the cycle i’ll describe in the next question and then i feel even Worse.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
i still think it’s rhe marching band thing i mentioned in the other post. it’s really hard for me to cry because one of the things my stepdad did was make fun of me and berate me until i cried, and then screamed at me for being too sensitive and crying a lot and then threaten to beat me until he had me lock myself in my room away from everyone. i can’t really cry in front of people without having an actual panic attack over it and any time i do cry it’s short and i force it to be silent because that’s the only way i know how to cry.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
my brother is really good at distracting me from my own nonsense and making me feel better. i also like going to my dad but he’s really emotional and open about his feelings so we usually end up having deep conversations one or both of us end up crying over.
4. Are you lonely right now?
still, eh. i’m reconnecting with my friends and generally feel kinda great right now but part of me craves a relationship but another part of me can’t stand the idea so i fulfill it through ships and romantic roleplays i guess.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
again, my brother or my dad.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
music doesn’t really help my anxiety, so i just listen to anything.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
the antlers. hospice especially is really relatable to me and touched me in ways i don’t even really know how to describe.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
everything but specifically the fact i’m trans and i’m terrified to come out to my family and then just trying to make it through life as a trans person.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
medication is the only thing that helped me. they can’t prescribe me xanax because i’m a minor but i feel like i’m definitely going to be prescribed xanax as an adult and i’m terrified of being addicted to it because i feel like i just won’t be able to stop taking it.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
i talked about them a little bit in my last post but i have a lot of nightmares about my stepdad where i either wake up crying or..not screaming but almost. a lot of them are just me screaming at him that he ruined my life but i feel like i just can’t get loud enough and he won’t hear me.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
my brother and sisters, my dad, my mom, my friends, and Cats. i feel really close to my cat rocky because as dumb as it sounds he was with me through my big suicidal breakdown last year. he got really sick around that time so we both just felt terrible together.
12. One regret?
i have no idea if this counts as pg13-ish so, like, feel free to completely remove this if it’s not @mods. anyways, i really regret having sex when i was 15. i was only with that person for two months and then basically immediately after they started treating terribly. i’m over that part and i know virginity is just a social construct but i still wish i like..saved it for someone i actually love. i blame this + a really intense emotionally abusive relationship for the fact that dating is so hard for me. so i guess i’m not actually as over it as i said i was.
13. One thing you're proud of?
i didn’t actually kill myself any of the 50000000 times i tried.
14. One thing you wish?
i wish my anxiety and depression would just go away. they’ve stopped me from doing so much.
15. Virtual hugs?
nah, not really a hug person, but thank u
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
abusive stepdad that had me trying to kill myself multiple times when i was ten years old. when my mom broke up with him he beat her and then stalked us to the point my grandpa had to come sleep on the couch with a shotgun. and when i say this hurt me deeply, i mean that this literally ruined my life and i would be a completely different person if it didn’t happen. so. it’s this old pain i wish i was just numb to by now but. yeah. i still have to see/hear him because he’s my youngest sisters dad and every time he comes over it results in me having panic attacks and crying while hiding in my room which, like, makes me think of the cycle i’ll describe in the next question and then i feel even Worse.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
i still think it’s rhe marching band thing i mentioned in the other post. it’s really hard for me to cry because one of the things my stepdad did was make fun of me and berate me until i cried, and then screamed at me for being too sensitive and crying a lot and then threaten to beat me until he had me lock myself in my room away from everyone. i can’t really cry in front of people without having an actual panic attack over it and any time i do cry it’s short and i force it to be silent because that’s the only way i know how to cry.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
my brother is really good at distracting me from my own nonsense and making me feel better. i also like going to my dad but he’s really emotional and open about his feelings so we usually end up having deep conversations one or both of us end up crying over.
4. Are you lonely right now?
still, eh. i’m reconnecting with my friends and generally feel kinda great right now but part of me craves a relationship but another part of me can’t stand the idea so i fulfill it through ships and romantic roleplays i guess.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
again, my brother or my dad.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
music doesn’t really help my anxiety, so i just listen to anything.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
the antlers. hospice especially is really relatable to me and touched me in ways i don’t even really know how to describe.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
everything but specifically the fact i’m trans and i’m terrified to come out to my family and then just trying to make it through life as a trans person.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
medication is the only thing that helped me. they can’t prescribe me xanax because i’m a minor but i feel like i’m definitely going to be prescribed xanax as an adult and i’m terrified of being addicted to it because i feel like i just won’t be able to stop taking it.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
i talked about them a little bit in my last post but i have a lot of nightmares about my stepdad where i either wake up crying or..not screaming but almost. a lot of them are just me screaming at him that he ruined my life but i feel like i just can’t get loud enough and he won’t hear me.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
my brother and sisters, my dad, my mom, my friends, and Cats. i feel really close to my cat rocky because as dumb as it sounds he was with me through my big suicidal breakdown last year. he got really sick around that time so we both just felt terrible together.
12. One regret?
i have no idea if this counts as pg13-ish so, like, feel free to completely remove this if it’s not @mods. anyways, i really regret having sex when i was 15. i was only with that person for two months and then basically immediately after they started treating terribly. i’m over that part and i know virginity is just a social construct but i still wish i like..saved it for someone i actually love. i blame this + a really intense emotionally abusive relationship for the fact that dating is so hard for me. so i guess i’m not actually as over it as i said i was.
13. One thing you're proud of?
i didn’t actually kill myself any of the 50000000 times i tried.
14. One thing you wish?
i wish my anxiety and depression would just go away. they’ve stopped me from doing so much.
15. Virtual hugs?
nah, not really a hug person, but thank u
TardisCatTwo wrote:
1.What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
When two of my friends pranked me to think one of them died... I was scarred for life. I even had to bring a THERAPY PILLOW to school.
2.When's the last time you cried and why?
As I'm answering this, because I'm remembering the trauma from the first question I answered..
EDIT: I thought I was going to cry, but, as always, I just couldn't do it. So, new answer:
Who knows?
3.Who/what makes you feel better when you're sad?
Cats and ANY FORM OF HUGS. Along with making myself into a tiny little blanket burrito and hugging my precious 'Kitty' (my favourite stuffed animal, DON'T JUDGE ME....)
4.Are you lonely right now?
Oh, OF COURSE NOT. I'm obviously not lonely AT ALL.... Naw, I'm EXTREMELY lonely rn.
5.Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
No one. Although I may at times seem needy and vulnerable on this site, I'm quite the opposite IRL. I feel as if I just can't let anyone IRL know that there's something wrong.... I don't know why, but that's how I feel.
6.What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Hmm... What's the use of music when I can't hear it over my own depressed thoughts?
7.What's your favourite 'sad mood' band?
Yet again....
8.Anxious about anything in the future you'd like to talk about?
Oh, definitely. But Gail already knows....
9.What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Venting to people on here.... I don't vent for attention, or out of expectation that people can magically fix my problems.... I do it because I HAVE TO LET IT OUT. If I don't, I will suddenly blow up at those of whom I love/care about...
10.Do you have nightmares and about what?
Yes. And, if you would like to know what about, Gail, please PM me about it....
11.What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People like Gail.
12.One regret?
Only ONE?....
14.One thing you're proud of?
( I know this is two, but it's practically the ONLY TWO... ) The novel I'm writing, and the fact that I haven't kicked the bucket yet. ( Not just from suicide, I also mean because of my poor health. ;n; )
15.One thing you wish?
Hmm... Maybe to actually KNOW WHAT TO DO for once, instead of having practically no way to know what's right????
16.Virtual Hugs?
ALWAYS. If I DON'T want one, THERE IS SOMETHING EXTREEEEEEEMELY WRONG AND YOU SHOULD GET A DEPRESSION PROFESSIONALIST FOR ME OR SOMETHING. OR A PSYCHIATRIST FOR ME.
When two of my friends pranked me to think one of them died... I was scarred for life. I even had to bring a THERAPY PILLOW to school.
2.When's the last time you cried and why?
As I'm answering this, because I'm remembering the trauma from the first question I answered.
.EDIT: I thought I was going to cry, but, as always, I just couldn't do it. So, new answer:
Who knows?
3.Who/what makes you feel better when you're sad?
Cats and ANY FORM OF HUGS. Along with making myself into a tiny little blanket burrito and hugging my precious 'Kitty' (my favourite stuffed animal, DON'T JUDGE ME....)
4.Are you lonely right now?
Oh, OF COURSE NOT. I'm obviously not lonely AT ALL.... Naw, I'm EXTREMELY lonely rn.
5.Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
No one.
Although I may at times seem needy and vulnerable on this site, I'm quite the opposite IRL. I feel as if I just can't let anyone IRL know that there's something wrong.... I don't know why, but that's how I feel.6.What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Hmm... What's the use of music when I can't hear it over my own depressed thoughts?
7.What's your favourite 'sad mood' band?
Yet again....
8.Anxious about anything in the future you'd like to talk about?
Oh, definitely. But Gail already knows....
9.What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Venting to people on here.... I don't vent for attention, or out of expectation that people can magically fix my problems.... I do it because I HAVE TO LET IT OUT. If I don't, I will suddenly blow up at those of whom I love/care about...
10.Do you have nightmares and about what?
Yes. And, if you would like to know what about, Gail, please PM me about it....
11.What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
People like Gail.
12.One regret?
Only ONE?....
14.One thing you're proud of?
( I know this is two, but it's practically the ONLY TWO... ) The novel I'm writing, and the fact that I haven't kicked the bucket yet. ( Not just from suicide, I also mean because of my poor health. ;n; )
15.One thing you wish?
Hmm... Maybe to actually KNOW WHAT TO DO for once, instead of having practically no way to know what's right????
16.Virtual Hugs?
ALWAYS. If I DON'T want one, THERE IS SOMETHING EXTREEEEEEEMELY WRONG AND YOU SHOULD GET A DEPRESSION PROFESSIONALIST FOR ME OR SOMETHING. OR A PSYCHIATRIST FOR ME.
*smiles, shaking head* Tardis, Tardis, Tardis* *huggggggggggs*
I think what I like about you so much is that you are constantly somehow entertaining...even when talking about feelings that suck to have...always building up the suspense and using hyperbole and irony...and so EMPHATIC sometimes...but always in a THIS IS ME and I'm proud of it sort of way...that is very confident in a way and very self-aware, and also very passionate about life. If I'm ever just feeling blah...you've got sort of the life force energy vibe that wakes me up a little...that's what your energy seems like to me. A very lively person who things MATTER to. And that's why we see all the CAPS and such but combined with way-too-good-for-your-age vocabulary that makes me wish whatever you got could be put in the water around some of the schools I tend to work at.
Well, no one can say I don't give extremely awesome compliments to the people that I like! There's yours Tardis, and everone else who I think is awesome one here...you know who you are! But anyway...1. Thank you for referencing me in this so many times. Awwww. I am greatful for you as well.
2. Yes, I will be PMing you with the couple of minutes I have left before hitting the sack (my hours are completely backwards).
3. I am the same way in real life as you say that you are. I would never in a million years go up to someone and ask them when was the last time they cried. If I asked any of these questions to anyone, they would be surrounded in diclaimers and apologies and awkward "ummmmms" and hesitation and deflection and avoidance and...probably...escape before ever coming this close to a vulnerable moment with anybody. It's sad. I want these kinds of moments. I am glad we can share them, but yep...those rare times it happens in real life that someone confides in me or asks me the right question, and I confide in them, are magical moments. But the fact that I'm doing this is a testament to how roleplaying and chatting on this site has skyrocketed my social-emotional skills in some ways. I dunno. Writing is just so much easier than talking...
Thanks, Tardis! *tight hugs*
Omg thanks Gail!! *hugses*
Aw, what the hell...
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?`
When my 2nd girlfriend broke up with me. It was like what Humphrey Bobart said on the movie Casablanca...
"I remember the wow finish. A guy standing on a station platform in the rain with a comical look in his face because his insides have been kicked out." Yeah, I felt like that.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
When mom died in 2015.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
I look to my bestest friend in the whole world sitting across from me.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
My bestest friend in the whole world.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
I seem to slap the headphones on and listen to Faun or Ali Azam. It soothes me.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Don't know if I have one. Seems to be different each time.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Nuclear destruction of the world. Sure I can talk about it, but it's always been a constant in my life and talking about it won't change anything.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Smoke a half-lid.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
Not so much anymore. My dreams can't seem to come up with anything worse than reality.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My bestest friend in the whole world.
12. One regret?
I have many to choose from. Can't seem to decide on one to mention.
13. One thing you're proud of?
My dad. I wish I was more like him.
14. One thing you wish?
World Peace
15. Virtual hugs?
Sure. They never hurt.
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?`
When my 2nd girlfriend broke up with me. It was like what Humphrey Bobart said on the movie Casablanca...
"I remember the wow finish. A guy standing on a station platform in the rain with a comical look in his face because his insides have been kicked out." Yeah, I felt like that.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
When mom died in 2015.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
I look to my bestest friend in the whole world sitting across from me.
4. Are you lonely right now?
No
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
My bestest friend in the whole world.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
I seem to slap the headphones on and listen to Faun or Ali Azam. It soothes me.
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Don't know if I have one. Seems to be different each time.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
Nuclear destruction of the world. Sure I can talk about it, but it's always been a constant in my life and talking about it won't change anything.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Smoke a half-lid.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
Not so much anymore. My dreams can't seem to come up with anything worse than reality.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My bestest friend in the whole world.
12. One regret?
I have many to choose from. Can't seem to decide on one to mention.
13. One thing you're proud of?
My dad. I wish I was more like him.
14. One thing you wish?
World Peace
15. Virtual hugs?
Sure. They never hurt.
This might get a slightly bit dark, and I don’t know.
See more
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
When people I thought I could trust, that I can depend on to not leave me who has promised to be supportive and accepting no matter what, leaves me in the end when I am going through a tough time. It...it has been a while, but it has hurt me so deeply that even conversing with new people, or talking with my own father had me holding my tongue even on normal conversational topics, because I know that I am going to screw up, that I am going to let something slip and they will realize what a horrible person I am and leave me in the end.
Or a second case, people who I thought are supportive, who I thought I should have been the closest to because they are my mother turning out to be the main cause of all those years of depression and suicidal thoughts. Who has completely polluted my mind into thinking my father is a horrible, horrible unemotional bastard, that my grandmother on my father’s side is a money-grubbing bitch that hates my guts, that I am an illegitimate child, that all my relatives are my enemies, that everyone is judging me and the world is my enemy and the only person that I can supposedly depend on is my mother who uses me to drain my father’s money and has since then tried to kill herself multiple times and attempted to choke me- yeah, I am still not over that.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Last night. I’ll be honest here, I have major depression so it happens quite often. I just had a cry last night-no different from usual I suppose. Didn’t sleep at all because of it- my head is just filled with too many depressing and extreme things that even my usual coping methods can’t do anything against it.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Dark jokes.
Mostly self-deprecating jokes, memes about major depression and my anxiety. Sometimes watching a hilarious video is enough, sometimes it is not and the only thing I can do is to just wait it out.
4. Are you lonely right now?
Yes, even though my parent is just in the next room and I can always reach my friends with a quick message, I still feel extremely lonely. It is not the problem of not having anyone to talk to as much as my brain working against me.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
No one. Being vulnerable with people close to me, is terrifying to be honest. So no, I don’t do calls ever.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Whatever songs out there- I have a pretty diverse playlist because I listen to songs practically non stop no matter what I am doing, be it doing homework or even anything that might give me even the slightest hint of stress. (Except showering, obviously, but you get the idea)
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Skillet, probably, and Imagine Dragons as well. Idk, I don’t pay much attention to the bands.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
What am I going to be? What do I want to be? What can I do in the future? What can I do to prepare? Do I have enough strength or motivation to even do anything about my worries? Would I somehow be able to deal with my family problems? Would I somehow manage to weather the stress of school and survive? Can I survive my depression- which has been getting progressively worse ever since the fallout between me and my friends? There is just too much- and I am not talking about it as much as I am ranting I think.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Music, nothing better than music. It isn’t a foolproof plan, but if I am in a stressing situation I just put on my headphones and turn the volume up to the max-who cares if it will damage my hearing- I just want to not cry in public.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
It is usually not something based on reality, but referencing it definitely. There is often someone chasing me, someone humanoid and very, very cold. My nightmares are often very haunting, filled with a deep sense of worry and wrong-ness to it. Twisting hallways, never ending mazes and always, always someone chasing me. It is irrational, but I occasionally stay up for days because I was so terrified of those nightmares, of dreaming up the same thing again.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My father, while he can’t understand how irrational depression is, nor does he understand emotions too well, he tries his best to be supportive and would always do his best to give me what I want, and what is best for me.
My friend, my longest friend, who instead of looking at me in contempt or fear when I told her about my depression, only asked if I am doing alright or seeking help.
My art teacher, who was supportive through all my life decisions and has always been able to cheer me up no matter if I am going through a bad episode. She has always supported and encouraged me to pursue art, and has taught me and guided me more than anyone else.
My friend’s dog, who is the cutest friggin thing in the entire universe and you can’t argue with me on that because she is that fluffy and that cute.
12. One regret?
Not seeking help earlier, not being a good enough person, not working harder, not thinking through life-changing decisions because I am too stupidly emotional.
13. One thing you're proud of?
My art skills, probably, as it is possibly the only thing that makes me feel good about myself.
That I can play two instruments- one Western and one Chinese, it makes me feel proud of myself that I, to some extent, is still connected to my roots I guess.
14. One thing you wish?
Short term: To have a pet snake, or a pet cat, whichever works. I just want someone to just be there for me, physically, when I am going through a bad time. I just really want to have someone that I can spoil and pet and cherish- to feel like I am worth something at the very least.
Long term: Get a nice apartment, live with my future pet, have a relatively well paying job that lets me get by and maybe have tea sometimes. A quiet life, meeting up with friends and a low-stress job I guess. The last one is the most important because I do not handle stress well, at all.
15. Virtual hugs?
Not really- I never understood those virtual hugs. It is nice, I suppose, I can appreciate the sentiment.
When people I thought I could trust, that I can depend on to not leave me who has promised to be supportive and accepting no matter what, leaves me in the end when I am going through a tough time. It...it has been a while, but it has hurt me so deeply that even conversing with new people, or talking with my own father had me holding my tongue even on normal conversational topics, because I know that I am going to screw up, that I am going to let something slip and they will realize what a horrible person I am and leave me in the end.
Or a second case, people who I thought are supportive, who I thought I should have been the closest to because they are my mother turning out to be the main cause of all those years of depression and suicidal thoughts. Who has completely polluted my mind into thinking my father is a horrible, horrible unemotional bastard, that my grandmother on my father’s side is a money-grubbing bitch that hates my guts, that I am an illegitimate child, that all my relatives are my enemies, that everyone is judging me and the world is my enemy and the only person that I can supposedly depend on is my mother who uses me to drain my father’s money and has since then tried to kill herself multiple times and attempted to choke me- yeah, I am still not over that.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
Last night. I’ll be honest here, I have major depression so it happens quite often. I just had a cry last night-no different from usual I suppose. Didn’t sleep at all because of it- my head is just filled with too many depressing and extreme things that even my usual coping methods can’t do anything against it.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
Dark jokes.
Mostly self-deprecating jokes, memes about major depression and my anxiety. Sometimes watching a hilarious video is enough, sometimes it is not and the only thing I can do is to just wait it out.
4. Are you lonely right now?
Yes, even though my parent is just in the next room and I can always reach my friends with a quick message, I still feel extremely lonely. It is not the problem of not having anyone to talk to as much as my brain working against me.
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
No one. Being vulnerable with people close to me, is terrifying to be honest. So no, I don’t do calls ever.
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
Whatever songs out there- I have a pretty diverse playlist because I listen to songs practically non stop no matter what I am doing, be it doing homework or even anything that might give me even the slightest hint of stress. (Except showering, obviously, but you get the idea)
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Skillet, probably, and Imagine Dragons as well. Idk, I don’t pay much attention to the bands.
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
What am I going to be? What do I want to be? What can I do in the future? What can I do to prepare? Do I have enough strength or motivation to even do anything about my worries? Would I somehow be able to deal with my family problems? Would I somehow manage to weather the stress of school and survive? Can I survive my depression- which has been getting progressively worse ever since the fallout between me and my friends? There is just too much- and I am not talking about it as much as I am ranting I think.
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Music, nothing better than music. It isn’t a foolproof plan, but if I am in a stressing situation I just put on my headphones and turn the volume up to the max-who cares if it will damage my hearing- I just want to not cry in public.
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
It is usually not something based on reality, but referencing it definitely. There is often someone chasing me, someone humanoid and very, very cold. My nightmares are often very haunting, filled with a deep sense of worry and wrong-ness to it. Twisting hallways, never ending mazes and always, always someone chasing me. It is irrational, but I occasionally stay up for days because I was so terrified of those nightmares, of dreaming up the same thing again.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My father, while he can’t understand how irrational depression is, nor does he understand emotions too well, he tries his best to be supportive and would always do his best to give me what I want, and what is best for me.
My friend, my longest friend, who instead of looking at me in contempt or fear when I told her about my depression, only asked if I am doing alright or seeking help.
My art teacher, who was supportive through all my life decisions and has always been able to cheer me up no matter if I am going through a bad episode. She has always supported and encouraged me to pursue art, and has taught me and guided me more than anyone else.
My friend’s dog, who is the cutest friggin thing in the entire universe and you can’t argue with me on that because she is that fluffy and that cute.
12. One regret?
Not seeking help earlier, not being a good enough person, not working harder, not thinking through life-changing decisions because I am too stupidly emotional.
13. One thing you're proud of?
My art skills, probably, as it is possibly the only thing that makes me feel good about myself.
That I can play two instruments- one Western and one Chinese, it makes me feel proud of myself that I, to some extent, is still connected to my roots I guess.
14. One thing you wish?
Short term: To have a pet snake, or a pet cat, whichever works. I just want someone to just be there for me, physically, when I am going through a bad time. I just really want to have someone that I can spoil and pet and cherish- to feel like I am worth something at the very least.
Long term: Get a nice apartment, live with my future pet, have a relatively well paying job that lets me get by and maybe have tea sometimes. A quiet life, meeting up with friends and a low-stress job I guess. The last one is the most important because I do not handle stress well, at all.
15. Virtual hugs?
Not really- I never understood those virtual hugs. It is nice, I suppose, I can appreciate the sentiment.
See more
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
I get teary-eyed an embarrassing amount of the time if I go too in-depth about sad character daydreams lol
But like, actual balled my eyes out cried? Cant' remember. I know I do it, but I can't remember the actual last time I did it or for what specific reason.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
I have a playlist on youtube filled with videos that make me laugh. If I'm feeling really bad, I usually go to this playlist to try and make myself feel better.
Also, my cats.
4. Are you lonely right now?
Literally all of the time. :->
See question 1, as well as the fact that I have no irl friends and no SO. I'm very very alone and lonely.... :->
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I... don't lol
I bottle it all up until either I explode all alone into a puddle of tears and/or my mom notices and asks if something's going on.
I don't want to bother people with my issues so I just... don't lol
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
YMCA - village people
Take On Me - Aha
Total Eclipse of the Heart - Bonnie Tyler
Down Under - Men at Work
Etc. etc.
These are my jams dude
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Sleeping at Last - they're cozy when I'm in a good mood and saddening when I'm in a bad one lol
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
YEAH WHAT THE EFF IS WITH COLLEGE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I don't want to do college, someone help me, I DON'T WANNA
I have to make portfolio pieces and then I have to apply for schools that are going to get me in debt for the rest of my life without promise that I'll actually get a job I like or will pay me well enough to keep me on my feet, I might end up hating my job whether I get one in my field or not, and I don't want to end up hating the rest of my life based on what I decide to major in or get a job in and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Sleep it off. If I take a nap or sleep over night, that's 1-9 hours that I literally am as close to being dead to the world as I can get. Push away the anxiety for future me to deal with! (Or... y'know... nap away because I don't deal with anxiety lol)
fr tho? Break the issue down into little pieces if it's a task, or if it's a mood / situation / relationship, either talk it out, or just push it away to the best of my ability.
"Stop thinking about it. Stop it. Seriously stop it," until it goes away lol
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
Occasionally; Most of the time it's about dying or getting killed or being put in dangerous situations or etc. etc., rarely anything specific.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My cats. Some days they're the only things keeping me afloat.
12. One regret?
Not getting my crap together and doing better in highschool tbh. Like... if I woke up tomorrow on my first day of highschool I would do things completely different.
And maybe it wouldn't change much, but that's always the one thing I go to for some reason????
13. One thing you're proud of?
Um....
Uh....
yeaaaaaaaaaah....
-tip toes away-
14. One thing you wish?
A re-do button but I can keep some / all of the life-knowledge I have now...
15. Virtual hugs?
Please ; 3 ;
[/collapse
1. What's one thing that hurt you deeply?
Wow this answer got long OOPS
Being a secondary / last resort friend / disposable
I'm pretty awful when it comes to talking with people on a regular basis, I know that about myself, and so I don't get angry at others for not talking to me immediately about stuff, but it's... it's when people completely forget about me up until I'm useful to them that really hurts. My first absolute best friend (highschool) just completely stopped talking to me out of the blue and only texts me every few months, usually along the lines of "Hey, make this thing for me : 3", two other friends ended our last conversation happily and then I never ever heard from them again and they removed me from friend lists, so I couldn't get ahold of them to ask what I had done wrong, if anything; And seeing another friend just completely forget about me for 90% of the time while only focusing on their other friends (who they're able to see irl on a regular basis) just... hurts... a lot.
I'm the disposable / throw away friend and I hate it.
Being a secondary / last resort friend / disposable
I'm pretty awful when it comes to talking with people on a regular basis, I know that about myself, and so I don't get angry at others for not talking to me immediately about stuff, but it's... it's when people completely forget about me up until I'm useful to them that really hurts. My first absolute best friend (highschool) just completely stopped talking to me out of the blue and only texts me every few months, usually along the lines of "Hey, make this thing for me : 3", two other friends ended our last conversation happily and then I never ever heard from them again and they removed me from friend lists, so I couldn't get ahold of them to ask what I had done wrong, if anything; And seeing another friend just completely forget about me for 90% of the time while only focusing on their other friends (who they're able to see irl on a regular basis) just... hurts... a lot.
I'm the disposable / throw away friend and I hate it.
2. When's the last time you cried and why?
I get teary-eyed an embarrassing amount of the time if I go too in-depth about sad character daydreams lol
But like, actual balled my eyes out cried? Cant' remember. I know I do it, but I can't remember the actual last time I did it or for what specific reason.
3. Who/what makes you feel better when you're feeling sad?
I have a playlist on youtube filled with videos that make me laugh. If I'm feeling really bad, I usually go to this playlist to try and make myself feel better.
Also, my cats.
4. Are you lonely right now?
Literally all of the time. :->
See question 1, as well as the fact that I have no irl friends and no SO. I'm very very alone and lonely.... :->
5. Who do you call when you need someone to talk to?
I... don't lol
I bottle it all up until either I explode all alone into a puddle of tears and/or my mom notices and asks if something's going on.
I don't want to bother people with my issues so I just... don't lol
6. What songs do you listen to when you're sad or anxious that make you feel better?
YMCA - village people
Take On Me - Aha
Total Eclipse of the Heart - Bonnie Tyler
Down Under - Men at Work
Etc. etc.
These are my jams dude
7. What's your favorite "sad mood" band?
Sleeping at Last - they're cozy when I'm in a good mood and saddening when I'm in a bad one lol
8. Anxious about anything in particular in the future that you'd like to talk about?
YEAH WHAT THE EFF IS WITH COLLEGE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I don't want to do college, someone help me, I DON'T WANNA
I have to make portfolio pieces and then I have to apply for schools that are going to get me in debt for the rest of my life without promise that I'll actually get a job I like or will pay me well enough to keep me on my feet, I might end up hating my job whether I get one in my field or not, and I don't want to end up hating the rest of my life based on what I decide to major in or get a job in and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
9. What's the best way you've found to deal with anxiety?
Sleep it off. If I take a nap or sleep over night, that's 1-9 hours that I literally am as close to being dead to the world as I can get. Push away the anxiety for future me to deal with! (Or... y'know... nap away because I don't deal with anxiety lol)
fr tho? Break the issue down into little pieces if it's a task, or if it's a mood / situation / relationship, either talk it out, or just push it away to the best of my ability.
"Stop thinking about it. Stop it. Seriously stop it," until it goes away lol
10. Do you have nightmares and about what?
Occasionally; Most of the time it's about dying or getting killed or being put in dangerous situations or etc. etc., rarely anything specific.
11. What's one thing in the world that you are grateful for?
My cats. Some days they're the only things keeping me afloat.
12. One regret?
Not getting my crap together and doing better in highschool tbh. Like... if I woke up tomorrow on my first day of highschool I would do things completely different.
And maybe it wouldn't change much, but that's always the one thing I go to for some reason????
13. One thing you're proud of?
Um....
Uh....
yeaaaaaaaaaah....
-tip toes away-
14. One thing you wish?
A re-do button but I can keep some / all of the life-knowledge I have now...
15. Virtual hugs?
Please ; 3 ;
[/collapse
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