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AnaisdeLuxxx

So I've been lurking around for quite a bit, trying to get the feel of things. There's just one thing I'm still confused about.

How do you write about your character experiencing the physical presence of another character without accidentally god-moding/god-modding?

For example, say I'm playing a character "Mary" and my partner is playing "Bob". The characters are an established, married couple.

Scene 1: Let's say Bob comes home after a long, hard day of working at the sawmill. Mary greets him at the door. So if I'm writing this by myself, I might mention how Mary can smell the sweat rising off his body. And I'll describe how she smiles secretly to herself about the fact that even after all these years, her pulse still races when she takes a deep whiff of his scent, that mixture of sawdust and musk and something that's essentially him.

Scene 2: Or maybe they're a battle couple, hacking at gelatinous tentacle monsters from outer space. Abruptly, the battle stops. The monsters are retreating. Mary turns to Bob with a grin of savage victory, and then her face softens into amusement. She pinches away a tiny, twitching piece of tentacle that he hadn't noticed was stuck in his goopy, gore-stiff hair.

In both these cases, I have Mary notice something about Bob that the other player has not specified.

I think there are just some things that we notice about other people that we sometimes don't notice about ourselves. Scent is a big one, since a lot of people are kind of immune to their own smell. Our own shape--how we fill the space around us--can be another. (We don't think we "loom terrifyingly" over small children, but sometimes, that's the impression they get even though we're trying our best to be friendly.)

So I guess what I'm trying to say is, to what extent can you imagine the other character's physical impact on your own character? Are both my scenes complete no-nos? Can they be okay in moderation? Can they be okay, but subject to revision depending on the other player's approval?

Also, what about hugs? I know that you can say that your character throws a punch and it's up to the other player to decide whether their own character gets hit or not. Is this the same for any kind of contact? Should it be "Mary spread her arms and walked towards Bob to give him a hug" instead of "Mary ran up to Bob and threw her arms around him"?

I'm sorry for asking such a noob question, but I've been exclusively writing solo, so I'm having a hard time imagining how the finer points of collaboration work. Crusty, old habits die hard. ^^; I'm eager to learn and input is always welcome!
Claine Moderator

I would personally have no problem with either of these. They're both cute interactions which highlight the relationship between the two characters. You're not making any wild assumptions, you're not taking away any of their autonomy, and it's the kind of thing you'd expect from a married couple.

I don't think many players would have a problem, but if you're unsure you could ask your partner ahead of time. You could say "Hey, I was thinking of having picking a piece of tentacle out of Bob's hair," and lead the discussion to the topic of how to proceed with these situations in the future. Once you've established this kind of thing is okay you don't need to ask for permission every single time.
Rogue-Scribe

Personally I wouldn't have an issue with those scenes. I think some of that has to be a given if writer's characters are going in as a married couple. To me, I'd concede the fact that my character would be hugged, etc. It is part of the character interaction, especially if they are 'married' in character.

I kone many demand to have total control over their character and don't tolerate any mention that their character did anything by the co-writer, and to me, that is just too rigid and impedes the telling of a story. But that is me.

I've always considered 'god modding' to be when someone has your charather do something that is out of their stated character profile. If a character is working at a sawmill for 8 hours and gets home, they will have a scent whether the writer would want them to or not. Or of they are in battle and it's the aftermath, they will have blood and or danaged armor or torn clothing. In teh end, it comes down to whether the writers are comfortable with some minor exchanging of control.
New to this, but I would agree with both previous answers. For me, an example of god-modding would be:

Mary ran up to Bob and threw her arms around him, and as she did so, he exclaimed, "I love coming home to you, babe!"

Because that would be controlling the other character.
It depends on the person you're playing with and to what extent you're doing this--which I know isn't a terribly helpful answer, but it really does vary from person to person. With that said, I also think there are some universal boundaries.

"Untouchables" would be things like the past, personality, dialogue, and actions of a character that is not yours. It's best not to make something up about what another character does or did (unless you have both agreed to it).

Appearance is a bit of a grey area. I believe you have to know the character pretty well to make any assertions about someone's appearance. If you imply that someone's character is making an expression or that their hair is styled a certain way that they never mentioned, that's god-modding. However, lets say the character walked into the room all huffy after something exploded in their face. Then it might be acceptable to state that they have a grumpy expression and their hair is floofed up from the explosion, even if those things weren't directly mentioned. Then again, maybe this character is a very tidy person who wouldn't wait to clean themselves up. Ultimately, you have to be intuitive and communicate with your partner.

Environment is less of a grey area. You can say a butterfly lands on someone's head or that a breeze rolled by without too many problems. I'd say that any situation where you can't control the environment is the exception, not the default. So unless you're in a strict DM driven RP or something, I wouldn't worry about saying a piece of tentacle got in someone's hair.

I'm not sure what category scent would fall into, but I consider it pretty similar to appearance because it can be controlled by the character. Unless you have some reason to believe that Bob showers before he comes home from the mill, you're pretty safe. I wouldn't make assertions about the kind of cologne or perfume that a character uses though. I hate it when people say that my characters smell like flowers. A lot of my characters don't use perfume, and the ones that do rarely prefer floral scents. The only character of mine who would smell flowery is... Well, my plant girl.

Finally, I think you're free to throw in your character's perspective or interpretation of a situation without too much worry. Just try to make it clear when your character is lying or whatever. I let some god-modding go on for waaayy too long because I thought the dude's character was just a compulsive liar. It turned out he was actually trying to force me to play my character as if she used to be in a relationship with his character. I didn't realize this until he had his character flashback to when they were "married", and then roped a bunch of other characters into some crazy quest to get her memories of their relationship back!
AnaisdeLuxxx Topic Starter

Wow, a really big thank you Claine, Dunedain-Ranger, TalonHammer, and MinetteDuMal! I'm definitely saving this thread somewhere I can refer back to it.
Claine wrote:
I don't think many players would have a problem, but if you're unsure you could ask your partner ahead of time. [...] Once you've established this kind of thing is okay you don't need to ask for permission every single time.
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
I've always considered 'god modding' to be when someone has your character do something that is out of their stated character profile. [...] In the end, it comes down to whether the writers are comfortable with some minor exchanging of control.

I love both of these suggestions! I'm starting to realize that communication and a kind of chemistry is really the key.
MinetteDuMal wrote:
It depends on the person you're playing with and to what extent you're doing this--which I know isn't a terribly helpful answer, but it really does vary from person to person.

I'd quote your entire comment if I could. Thank you for breaking everything down into separate components, including environment! The latter was something I couldn't quite put a finger on, and I'm really tickled that you managed to address it anyway. I love how clear, logical, and lucid your explanations are. This is like a Help Article all on its own.

Also, your anecdote about god-modding made me laugh. That was crazy! Now I really need to know how it ends... Did your character ever get "her memories" back? XD
What I tend to do in order to drop hints to people is say, for example; 'The blaring wail of a siren could be heard.' It implies that the sound exists, but it does not force the other character to necessarily hear it. Same thing for smells, sights, etc.

If you want to use the sense of feel, here's a scenario:

Other player: 'She flopped down onto the grass.'
You: 'The grass was damp from the morning dew.'

This implies that the grass was damp, but does not force the other character to acknowledge, or feel it.


Just a few tips and whatnot! <g>
I have only skimmed a little of this (lunch break almost over), but wanted to toss this out there.

Typically, little things like what you mention are okay. If you want to be sure, ask. You can ask for a general consent to little things like that, or ask first each time.

"Hey, is it safe to assume Bob is sweaty from work?"

"Hey, mind if I assume Bob has some harmless monster gunk on him?"

It usually won't significantly slow things down since it's such a quick little question that's generally going to be easy to answer.

I actually have a friend who, we've played with each other enough that we're often okay with minor godmods, and sometimes some bigger ones. We still often ask to make sure it's cool, but we also have a pretty solid idea when it is and isn't, and we're also fine with occasionally needing to adjust stuff. But if you don't have that kind of bond, I always encourage asking to be sure. :)
I personally like to make a distinction between godmodding and a newer term that's developed recently; 'autoing'

Both situations are technically an 'auto', which is conveying something about the other character your partner may not necessarily agree with. However, whether it's crucial is up to your roleplay partner itself. This is typically only a problem in a fight roleplay, where making your partner's character do something so that your character can gain an advantage (e.g. hitting them without giving the partner a chance to dodge). Assuming things that are either common sense or give both roleplayers an advantage without disrupting the character are typically fine.

Godmodding, as the lingo I understand, is when you make your character have an edge they didn't previously have before. In scenario too, if the monster attacked your character, but your character blocks with a forcefield they didn't previously have nor gave any indication of having a forcefield ability before hand.
anaisdeluxxx wrote:
I'd quote your entire comment if I could. Thank you for breaking everything down into separate components, including environment! The latter was something I couldn't quite put a finger on, and I'm really tickled that you managed to address it anyway. I love how clear, logical, and lucid your explanations are. This is like a Help Article all on its own.

Also, your anecdote about god-modding made me laugh. That was crazy! Now I really need to know how it ends... Did your character ever get "her memories" back? XD

I'm glad you liked my reply, I almost didn't post it because I thought I rambled too much lol.

That guy turned out to be a bit more than a god-modder. He wrote the story into a corner so I had no choice but to confront him about it OOCly. I tried to be polite but he didn't take it too well. The next time I logged in I was met with a barrage of PMs threatening me and detailing how big, scary, and wise he is, and how a frail little girl like me should have stayed in my place. I didn't humor him, I simply informed him that I was sending his message to the mods. He responded by making a new account and pretending to be a friend of his insisting that "He's really a good guy! He just has anger issues!" and something about how he doesn't trust women acting like leaders.

I don't think his "friend" needed to tell me he had issues in order for me to figure that out. The mods took care of it, but I don't roleplay on that site anymore. Too much crazy for me.

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