Forums » Smalltalk » Need someone to talk to.

Hi everyone my name's Luke. I'm posting here because im going through some rough times. Okay? Here we go. So here's what's going on. My wife and I live a good life. So my mother kept me out of school from the time that I was 11 until I was 16 when I met my wife. Her mother helped me get back into school and because of that I have my GED at the age of 20. I'm 25 right now. Now I didn't have the opportunity for my parents to buy me a car. My folks have always been poor and that's the way I grew up. Then after high school, I got my first job so I could help my wife's mother pay the bills and bring food into the house. So there the second reason I don't have a car. Now I know I could saved up money. But every time my wife and I had saved some money, we needed it for something or another. Now being that my nother in law has passed away, my father in law was our ride to get around. Well he moved out of here. Before that, he got hurt at work and they told him he need to have surgery done. And our vehicle payment was like 114 a week. So with him not working they will be taking his van back and not only will will that make it hard for him to get around, it also makes it hard for us to go anywhere. We have to bug people for rides now. And where we live, it takes about 2 or 3 hours to walk into town. I had a job interview in town Thursday at 6pm. When I got there, the guy asked me how I got there and I said I walked there and that I don't have a car. He explained the job and said the only thing that concerns him is me not having a vehicle to be able to get to work and from work. I get that part. Most jobs want you to have transportation to go back and forth. But in my shoes, how can I have a job close to me (even if it's 3 hours into town) if I can't even drive to get there. I'm at my wit's end. I'm ready to give up even trying to have or get a job. Now I know people will be like take the bus or ride a bike. Use Uber or dial a ride. I could do those. But with my wife getting a check each month, when we are done paying the bills and getting food for us, we have to save what little money we have in case we need something later on. And the job would be from 9pm to 12am seven days a week. That's a lot of walking! Not to mention that I'd have to walk like two hours before I need to be there. I just wanna cry you know. I can't even support my wife like I should. I hate how this seems like I'm complaining or ranting. But I'm not. I just want someone to talk to. A ear or a friend would even do. If there was a way for me to make money at home I would. I don't have internet expect on my phone. It's just a lot of stress. Which I was a kid again because as a kid, you don't often worry about stuff like this. Sorry for making this so long. Please message me to talk or chat. I don't mean to be depressing. But it is. It's a bad situation.

Hey there, I know what it's like trying to manage without a vehicle. I live nearly 20 miles from where I work, and I've never had a car or even a license. (I turn 30 soon.) I don't know what things are like where you live, but here's how I've been coping.

I do still ask friends for rides relatively often, but it's gotten down to probably about once a month. I am highly dependent on my city's public transportation system, which is fortunately pretty solid. It takes awhile to get places (still almost 2 hours to work), but I can get places. And although it costs money to use, it's still a tiny fraction of what I make in a day. It's even less now, since they set up a reduced fare program for low-income folks. Now, instead of capping at $100 a month to travel, it caps at before $30. It is a little higher in the next city over, but still a price that would be worth it to have a job.

Sometimes, there are places or times that I can't use public transit and can't get a ride. For those times, I got a bike. It cuts down on the time and effort to get places, doesn't require a license, and costs a fraction of what a car does. Transit here also has bike storage areas on vehicles and at some stops, so I can ride parts and bike parts. I was lucky: I had saved enough to invest in an electric-assisted bike, which makes it all easier, but does place a couple extra restrictions on where I can go (I'm not allowed on sidewalks or in state parks with my bike).

Something else you can look into is scooters/mopeds and motor kits for bikes. Again, a fraction of the price of a car. Just be sure to look up how your local law works with such things.

Some companies offer loans for things like bikes. That could potentially help you to get started with something you won't have to fix all the time.

I wish you luck.

Thank you for responding. Yeah I wish I could do those things. I don't have the money for such things. I was feeling bad about it because I have no job. My last place fired me because my mother in law had passed away and I took that day off. They let me go the next day. I might just ask my dad if he can find me a bike.

You should be able to collect unemployment while you look. You just have to be very honest with them about what happened. Often, they won't send money to people who quit or were fired unless it was for for something extenuating - like the death of a family member, which makes it reasonable for you to take the day off and unreasonable for them to fire you over it.

And for loans, it doesn't matter how much you have, usually, just what your credit score looks like. You just need to be sure you can pay them back.

Yeah I had a case opened with them. They closed my case because I couldn't get to a place to register for work.

*hugs* i'm sorry this is going on

Thank you. I appreciate everything you guys.

What? I'm sure the way unemployment works differs from place to place, but I don't understand this. Do you mean you were unable to keep up with their requirements for showing effort on searching for work? Where I'm at, at least, contact with a potential employer is required so many times a week, but it doesn't all have to be in person. And the only additional thing they require registration with is a website. Is that different where you're at?

Hey man, I hate to hear all that. It sounds like a lot to deal with.

I agree with Novalyyn though, about looking into a bike! They're pretty common, so I'd ask family and friends, and I even suggest looking on Facebook and Craigslist for anyone near you posting about bikes! You might be able to get a pretty cheap used bike, or sometimes people even give them away for free. You could also check pawn shops as well!

That seems to be your best option at the moment, so I'd really try any and every way to get my hands on a bike, scooter, moped, whatever. Even if it's a little out of your price range, don't be afraid to contact the person who posted it! Let them know you're really interested and wondering if the price is negotiable. Sometimes you'll find really kind people who are willing to work with you on the price, especially if its just an old bike they're trying to get rid of, to make space or get some quick cash for themselves. And if its not negotiable, but you find one that you could save up for, ask the seller if they would be able to hold it for you, so you could save up for it!

I really hope you can find a solution though, and I'm always willing to talk or even just listen to ya vent if you ever need to!

Thanks and I appreciate all of everyone's help. Yeah I'll look into the bike thing.