Forums » Smalltalk » Share your fears you have overcome.

I cut most of my hair off today and it's was scary.

Yesterday my curly hair that everyone always compliments was at the my shoulders. Today it's maybe two inches from my scalp.

I haven't had my hair this short since my mother forced me to cut my hair when I was 13. Ever since I've been mildly traumatized and put a lot of my self worth into my long curly hair. With an irriational fear that it wouldn't look as beautiful or curly or nice short.

I would cut my hair a inch maybe once a year or so to keep it healthy but that was it.

Today I stood in front of the mirror for ten minutes before finally just... Doing it.

I'm not sure how I feel about it entirely, but it's done. And my hair will grow back.

What were/are you afraid of that you overcame despite the fear?

I wouldn't say that I've overcome it, but my stage fright.

On Monday this week, I had my first ever proper dance performance in front of hundreds of people; and my god was I terrified. I was sweating a lot more than I should've been and I was shaking way too much. I also found myself speeding up my words when I was singing or speaking and it didn't help much.

However, I have them all week and so far I feel like some of that stage fright has... Disappeared. I'm not sweating as much and I barely shake, or fiddle with anything now. It may have only been three shows so far; but it's definitely decreased.

The nervousness will always be there, and I will always get shy and scared as it's just me; I'm socially awkward, it's in my nature. But I definitely feel like I've become at least a little more confident

Just saying, but I think short curly hair is amazing. Yes, long and curly is definitely pretty, but there's a lot of great styling options for short and curly.

I've had to overcome a lot of dumb monster fears to be a functional human at night. I still get paranoid about monsters in the dark and behind doors and just behind me and stuff, but it's not as bad as it used to be since I started deciding I have to use the bathroom dangit. Same thing crossing the street - a fear that a car will appear out of no where, or that a car I can see will speed up and/or swerve to hit me if I cross the street in front of them.

I've also been kinda getting past my fear of being in a leadership role, in large part because of all the poor leadership I've seen, as well as the frequency I have ideas to help fix things or get praised for certain things. I know I wouldn't be some amazing leader, but I think I also have realized that I'd be at least average, maybe a little above average. It's just too bad I didn't get here sooner - folks were asking me to take up volunteer lead for a convention last year.

Ohhh, I'm glad you are feeling better about being on stage. I definitely have stage fright too. You are doing great - one step at time.

I feel you bout the monsters. I struggle with sleep-anxiety, espeically at night. It's hard for me to sleep at night espeically if I am alone - I have to be alone for a few days soon day and night and I am a little...anxious to say the least.

Also, I do think you've be a great leader, you are kind, know the right things to say, and willing to face your fear, which are all great in a leader.

I'm still in an on/off fear of the dark. I don't like the idea of what it could be hiding, but at the same time, I love how it sort of blankets everything.

Finally got over my fear of scary movies. (Sort of. I'm terrified of demons, unless they're from Supernatural.) But the other paranormal stuff? Finally got over!

And talking to adults. I used to be so scared to go up and ask for sauce at Chick-fil-A, and now it's a breeze. Smile, say hi, ask for what you need, and bam! Easy!

I used to be afraid of the dark too... really bad as a kid and even into my teens. Completely over it now. The only time it pops up is if I watch something scary right before going to sleep and in that case...lights might stay on.

Well, I still have yet to get over the fear of trusting people, since this world isn't 100% safe.

But I have gotten over my fingernail biting habit that I used to do for years.

I also got rid of my fear a few years back of ghosts and haunted stories and stuff.

When I was little I was deathly afraid of frogs, if you can believe it. They always made such loud noises I knew it had to be some big, scary monster making it! But one day, my mom brought in a little tiny tree frog that she'd nearly run over with the lawn mower but stopped just in time.

It really was tiny, too, no bigger than an inch wide, and easily fitting in her cupped hands, and she handed it to me--its little legs tickled, and I wondered why I'd ever been scared of them at all...

This one may be a bit stupid, but I'm slightly scared (used to be so terrified I'd actually scream and run off if I saw one) of butterflies! But a few years ago I went into a butterfly house and while I kept curled in on myself the entire time I was walking, once I came out, I wasn't so scared. :> So long as they don't come at my face, butterflies and I are cool now.

Also, bees. Used to be terrified of bees... But the more I've come to understand and read about them, the less scared I am of them. I still am scared of being stung, but again, so long as they don't fly at my face, the bees and I are in a good place

I also used to be terrified about monsters coming and attacking me at night or when I was alone in the house. But I read somewhere that cats, in some cultures, protect against the dead and evil supernatural beings, so considering how many cats I have, I feel super safe lol


These aren't nearly as impressive as y'all's (mine're kind of stupid now that I look at 'em in comparison heheh) but still

Hey, it' s super impressive that you've managed to work on all those. Fears don't always make sense, but they're still very real, so take your credit!

I have a friend who's afraid of butterflies and especially moths. Big guy, and he feels ashamed about it a lot. The way he "sees" them really is pretty scary, though. He's been trying to work on it too, though.

I used have a deathly fear of fire... or anything hot for that matter. I couldn't iron clothes without breaking a sweat. Legitimately had a panic attack once when my grandmother asked me to check some sandwiches in the oven. No one else was in the house, and I just could not reach into it. I would cry if Mom wanted me to switch trays of cookies in the oven. Then I volunteered at a conference center and was put in the kitchen. No one could figure out why I so enjoyed working on the salad bar... Took me quite a while, but I eventually overcame that one. I even use a brulee torch in my artwork now.

Driving was another of my fears. Now I'm a school bus driver and drive one of the largest buses our company owns.

Funny how life works out.

Omgosh me too with the bee thing! It's not so much the sting that I'm afraid of though. It's the sound they make? At least that's what triggers it. The buzzing. Like, I watched Jupiter Ascending and all of a sudden there's this entire scene that revolves around bees on a bee farm, just out of no where and and I squirmed so hard through the entire thing. My friends spent more time being entertained by my discomfort than the movie honestly. It's an irrational fear/phobia, I know. And sadly I haven't really gotten over it. I can deal with one or two bees at a time but more than that, or if they get to close, and I will still freak out about it.

The irrational fear that I have mostly gotten over is sort of two fold. I used to be really terrified of being late cause I thought I'd miss out on stuff. Well, I got a toddler now. We're late to everything cause that's just how parenthood works. Once I accepted that, pff. Never worried about it again.

The other part is I had this pretty big fear of being forgotten. My dad has a really terrible memory about some things. (Which is a known family trait that I inherited. Thanks, dad.) He'd forget I was staying with him. Almost made me late for work one morning cause he didn't wake me up. He forgot to pick me up from the airport once. Things like that. So I sort of grew up with this fear that the people that love me would forget about me eventually. Forget to invite me to things. (Which ties in with the missing out/being left out fear from above.) Just generally forget I exist. With the help of some pretty swell friends and some honest to god hard work on my dad and his wife's side after they got married, I've been able to let that fear go for the most part. It feels so good being able to accept that I matter to people. And yea, sometimes I get forgotten or lost in the shuffle, but that doesn't reflect on my self worth any longer. I've come to understand that people are flawed and fail at things, like remembering. God knows I do it often enough myself!

Oh! I had this one too! My dad tried to teach me how to drive initially. All I managed to do was lift my foot off the brake to allow the car to idle forward and I legit broke down into tears and sobs and just couldn't. But I'm better now.

I renewed my learners permit three times. And promised myself that I'd never get a job in the transportation industry...

Totally not stupid--see my fear of frogs, hahah. I was so silly.

Hypodermic needles.

The first time I faced this fear most intensely was during military processing. There's this "hall of shots" you go down receiving immunizations from both sides (and behind, for the infamous peanut butter shot). In my head I was reciting creeds and mantras and songs and doing ANYTHING I could to put myself somewhere else, reminding myself that "enlistment is at the other side of the hall". At the end I was so dizzy I thought I'd collapse, but I went to a corner and did some stretching until my head cleared. The next time I remember being afraid was later on in the military, I was in the back of an LMTV and a medic was about to give me an IV. I started hyperventilating and everything was spinning, I'd never had an IV before and for whatever reason, that was much more mortifying than a handful of shots. The medic said "either I stick you now, or I wait for you to pass out and stick you anyways, don't tell me you aren't afraid to be shot at but can't take a little shot". The "insult" was sobering enough to settle me down. After that though, I realized she was right, it was a senseless fear and I needed to get over it. I decided the best way to do that was repeat exposure, so I started donating blood whenever a drive was around. The first time I donated, I almost passed out, but the more I went the easier it got. Soon it was a simple process, ever since then I don't bat an eye whether I'm taking a shot or giving blood.

Thank you everyone for telling me about your own fears and everything. I love you so much.

I'm dealing with a lot right now, struggling, or else I'd reply to each and every one of you but I really appreciate it and am proud of you even if you are still afraid.

Oh jeez, how'd I forget?

Yeah, when I was younger, I was supposed to do a blood test every so often because of a medication I was on. I think. I'm not sure. What I do know for sure is that I had to go get my blood drawn occasionally, and that it took three people to do it. One to stick me, one to hold me down, and my mom to help hold me and keep trying to reassure me. This was in elementary school, mind you, and I am a small person even now.

My mom's pretty sure it actually stemmed from a kinda traumatic event when I was really little, which I actually partially remember. The part I remember is two nurses sticking little needles that had plastic blue butterflies on them in each of my arms. How accurate that is, I don't know. I'm hiding what my mom told me about it in case of needle-squeamish people. It's unpleasant, and typing it up actually got me rubbing my arms...



Anyway, weirdly enough, it was a weird mood one day that got me to where it just takes one person to handle me. I think I was some kind of... depressed, emotionally numb, something, and my family wasn't really able to get any real responses out of me. We had immunizations that day. When it was my turn, I was starting to be a little more present mentally, but I didn't really want to be, so I just pretended. My brother threw my coat over my head, and I just left it there. I felt them taking my arm and all that, but I was determined to just sit still and ignore everything... and then it was done. We left, and things were okay.

I still hate needles. I still have to look anywhere that isn't what's going on, and it's still really hard, but I can cope, and I've come across a few folks who are just magic and I'm like "oh, it's done?" I actually can look at a needle already in my arm (I gave plasma for awhile), I just can't watch the poke.

Oh man. Yeah my rule is a nurse can try twice, and if they don't get it, they gave to go get someone who has done it for longer than they have. No "third time's a charm," no way, it's two and you're out.

Heh...that's not a bad rule. Fortunately I am told I have good, easy to find veins so they typically never need to try more than once.