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what is the 'fast and the furious' movies about?

Grandmas in wheelchairs eating potatoes.

Why is there bacon in the soap?

Reptar.

What is 5% of 34556778534567765435678?

the sun.

What are the 'Wrong Turn' movies about?

Three guys looking for their friend after an unforgetable night in Las Vegas that they forgot.

Who's name is also John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmit's?

Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny, and that marble over there on the ground.

What is the capital of Mars?

Arnold Swarzinager

How do you get an elephant pregnant?

The man. The man with the power. The power of voodoo.

Who do? You do...what?

Eat poop

What happens if Wonder woman and Batman do "it"?

The sun will burn out.

What is 1/0?

A big long hot dog....
what happens if I eat explosives?

You win this brand new 2012 Mustang!

Why do kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

They don't. The commercials have lied to us all this time!

What happens if I put my feet in a bucket filled with water and put my fingers in an electrical socket?

God gives you a pony.

Should I clean my house?

Chicken strips.

Why are pants so uncomfortable?

Because shorts are comfy and easy to wear.

How do I prepare fish tacos?

You slaughter a horse on top of an active volcano and hope that one day a pair of winged fish tacos fly through your open window, bringing a message of tasty delight.

Will you teach me how to dougie?

It's just a jump to the left & then a step to the right. Put your hands on your hips, you bring your knees in tight, but it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane.

How do I change a baby's diaper?

Now, listen very carefully because this is really important! You take the baby's diapers throw it on you're neighbors yard. Eat some ice cream dump it on the baby, and listen to dubstep. Then make out with a tomato and you accomplish the mission?

How do get everyone to bow down at my feet, and do my homework

Sue them


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