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I can't say I know how is it and I can't say I understand you because I don't.
Taking care of people is hard and I don't think I will ever be capable of such thing unless I become father but even then I doubt I could take care of adults which makes me respect them as the job of adult caretaker is often underrated and demanding.
I think people meant normal as in 'average' which is not bad but doesn't have distinctive qualities that one could call as unique, sometimes little normalcy helps, not everyone needs to be outgoing singer or something like that and that's beautiful.
I adore humanity in that aspect, as they are diverse and you won't see two exact copies of the same person(twins and triples don't count)
As for your parents, well I can't give you advise in that one as my relationship with them isn't the best, although I think communication should have solved it.
Is it bad to be little selfish sometimes, have your own dreams and plans? No.
Is it bad wanting to be free from duty and chores? No, although they need to be fulfilled one way or another.
I don't think you're horrible, no one is at least inherently, sure there would be moments where you would feel like the worst person out there but it will change, you will change, world will change.
Taking care of people is hard and I don't think I will ever be capable of such thing unless I become father but even then I doubt I could take care of adults which makes me respect them as the job of adult caretaker is often underrated and demanding.
I think people meant normal as in 'average' which is not bad but doesn't have distinctive qualities that one could call as unique, sometimes little normalcy helps, not everyone needs to be outgoing singer or something like that and that's beautiful.
I adore humanity in that aspect, as they are diverse and you won't see two exact copies of the same person(twins and triples don't count)
As for your parents, well I can't give you advise in that one as my relationship with them isn't the best, although I think communication should have solved it.
Is it bad to be little selfish sometimes, have your own dreams and plans? No.
Is it bad wanting to be free from duty and chores? No, although they need to be fulfilled one way or another.
I don't think you're horrible, no one is at least inherently, sure there would be moments where you would feel like the worst person out there but it will change, you will change, world will change.
No, you're by no means a horrible person, even if your Mom says that, (for once I'm telling someone to not to listen to their parent lol) it's admirable to help your Mom, you sound like a great kid.
I can also relate, so I feel you sweetheart, although I'd rather not explain why, as it's quite personal... But I understand the frustration.
If I might give some advice, maybe talk to your Mom about setting one day a week (or two or three in a month, however reasonable your Mom thinks it.) For yourself. Or like, a set of hours in a day for you to do fun things. For example...
"Mom, I'd really like to have a day for myself, would it be ok if we decided these: (whatever days/hours you think are best) for me to have some time to myself, or go out with my friends?"
Maybe she'll take that well, especially if you could find ways to do things on your own, such as having a friend or a friend's parent pick you up or drop you off rather than your mother, or if you can walk, take the bus, or ride a bike to where you'll meet your friends.
That way you both know what days you can and can't do things, and if it becomes a scheduled habit, then your friends could plan their events those days when they know you're free.
Perhaps consider a job of sorts, so you have your own money to spend for events, if money is an issue. Like watering plants, walking dogs, babysitting...ect, if you live in a neighborhood.
Claim your Independence and try to prove your maturity and responsibility to your Mom. Mothers have difficulty often letting their kids go and grow up, especially if you have a particularly strong bond and have been through a lot together. Keep showing her how much you love and care for her.
But no matter what, definitely keep it up. What you're doing is wonderful, and don't be ashamed, in fact... you can be proud of yourself for how much you do. It seems like you have a lot of maturity. Very few your age can claim that. But time will change things, it won't always be the way it is. Do what you can to keep being strong and independent, and don't be afraid to respectfully speak up for yourself.
It's not selfish to want to experience life, and the typical things youths your age get to do.
I can also relate, so I feel you sweetheart, although I'd rather not explain why, as it's quite personal... But I understand the frustration.
If I might give some advice, maybe talk to your Mom about setting one day a week (or two or three in a month, however reasonable your Mom thinks it.) For yourself. Or like, a set of hours in a day for you to do fun things. For example...
"Mom, I'd really like to have a day for myself, would it be ok if we decided these: (whatever days/hours you think are best) for me to have some time to myself, or go out with my friends?"
Maybe she'll take that well, especially if you could find ways to do things on your own, such as having a friend or a friend's parent pick you up or drop you off rather than your mother, or if you can walk, take the bus, or ride a bike to where you'll meet your friends.
That way you both know what days you can and can't do things, and if it becomes a scheduled habit, then your friends could plan their events those days when they know you're free.
Perhaps consider a job of sorts, so you have your own money to spend for events, if money is an issue. Like watering plants, walking dogs, babysitting...ect, if you live in a neighborhood.
Claim your Independence and try to prove your maturity and responsibility to your Mom. Mothers have difficulty often letting their kids go and grow up, especially if you have a particularly strong bond and have been through a lot together. Keep showing her how much you love and care for her.
But no matter what, definitely keep it up. What you're doing is wonderful, and don't be ashamed, in fact... you can be proud of yourself for how much you do. It seems like you have a lot of maturity. Very few your age can claim that. But time will change things, it won't always be the way it is. Do what you can to keep being strong and independent, and don't be afraid to respectfully speak up for yourself.
It's not selfish to want to experience life, and the typical things youths your age get to do.
I'm sure your mom is a nice person, but random shopping trips are probably not medically necessary and shouldn't run your life. Please do your best to assert better boundaries for yourself; it may be hard, but you'll be happier, and more importantly, resentment won't slowly hurt your love.
If mom is as good at talking you out of plans as you claim, the only way to win may be to not play; don't plan, just go. (Make sure to stick with friends and that she always knows where you are, though -- safety first.) Once a week, minimum. Better to feel guilty for enjoying your life than feel guilty you're mad that you don't, and if mom tries to add any guilt of her own, just walk 51m or more away until she learns you aren't her slave.
Most importantly, you aren't horrible or bad or irrational. You're a good kid who understands that making some sacrifices for mom's needs is reasonable, but forfeiting your childhood for her desires isn't. I hope she comes around.
If mom is as good at talking you out of plans as you claim, the only way to win may be to not play; don't plan, just go. (Make sure to stick with friends and that she always knows where you are, though -- safety first.) Once a week, minimum. Better to feel guilty for enjoying your life than feel guilty you're mad that you don't, and if mom tries to add any guilt of her own, just walk 51m or more away until she learns you aren't her slave.
Most importantly, you aren't horrible or bad or irrational. You're a good kid who understands that making some sacrifices for mom's needs is reasonable, but forfeiting your childhood for her desires isn't. I hope she comes around.
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