Does anyone just wanna explain or talk about their problems but can’t? They have no one they can talk with, well here is fine I mean we are strangers soooo we won’t judge. And we’ll probably never meet so I think it’s fine.... I am ready to die, I feel like there is no hope. My mother says “I understand” no you don’t! If you did mom you wouldn’t leave me alone at night, giving me the chance to break.... After hours I finally make it to sleep, before being awoken again to go back to a hell whole which I can’t stand. The kids are mean, and they have no idea how it feels to be treated so badly. Sitting there some mornings are worse like this one, i got up and pleaded because it’s to much right now. My head feels like it’s gonna explode, and begging my mother.... she says “Dez you can’t, I don’t wanna get in trouble.” What!? In trouble?! I thought you said you understand, but here you are complaining about cops and court!? I already told her, “I’ll take the blame, you won’t get in trouble it’s me that’s choosing to stay home.” Now sitting here saying sorry in my head because I know I messed up, I shouldn’t give up so easily but I’m weak. I need help, my friend says he understands but then sits there constantly telling me people love me so I should kill myself. I know people love me! I know that but do you think it helps? When I barely see them, they never wanna make plans or hang out even a little.... is that really love? I just don’t wanna live...
I don’t, wanna cause my mom trouble... at least not anymore than I already have, so I guess the best answer is to shut my mouth go and hide how i feel. It’s a win win right?
I want to encourage you to take a look through the mental health page for resources that might help. It sounds like a crisis line would be good for you right now. I've used a crisis line a few times myself. They're very good for helping you focus on something other than all the painful thoughts and sometimes to make a plan to seek ongoing care.
I'll also mention the group Here For You, although things like suicide are considered too sensitive to discuss within the group. Instead, we focus more on validation, sharing experiences that might help, and helping each other seek resources.
I'll also mention the group Here For You, although things like suicide are considered too sensitive to discuss within the group. Instead, we focus more on validation, sharing experiences that might help, and helping each other seek resources.
I second everything Novalyyn said. It sounds like you need to reach out to a crisis line for help. I'm sorry you're feeling this way and that school is like that for you. School wasn't good for me either, especially high school but I can say that, at least for me, as I got older things got better. And I believe things will eventually get better for you too, even if it's hard to see it.
Sometimes medication can really, really help your outlook on things, I know this from experience, and although that's not everybody's need, it sure is for some people, and can make a huge difference, like night and day. If you can convince your mom to let you get psychiatric care, if you're not currently, that might be good and if I was you, I wouldn't hesitate to talk to the counselors at school too, just to tell them what's going on.
But all that might be too much to consider all at once, so I'd say a crisis line seems like the thing to do. Again, I'm really sorry you've been feeling this way. *hugs*
Sometimes medication can really, really help your outlook on things, I know this from experience, and although that's not everybody's need, it sure is for some people, and can make a huge difference, like night and day. If you can convince your mom to let you get psychiatric care, if you're not currently, that might be good and if I was you, I wouldn't hesitate to talk to the counselors at school too, just to tell them what's going on.
But all that might be too much to consider all at once, so I'd say a crisis line seems like the thing to do. Again, I'm really sorry you've been feeling this way. *hugs*
And I want to encourage you, Dezi, that venting is good, I think. I do it in that group Novalyyn linked to called Here For You and sometimes it helps to just write out the problems your facing and the feelings, and just have someone hear you. And we do hear you. Even if a person can't talk about certain topics you can talk about the feelings, and the problems causing them. I think it's good you're able to talk about it. And if ya wanna join that group, I encourage you to do so. It's really easy. If it was hard, I wouldn't have done it, 'cause I'm kinda lazy about stuff like that. 
Thanks, I’ll try the group out. The rest ill consider
May i vent a little?
Does anyone else have the insane problem of making NO friends within the clique you can associate yourself with? I’d love someone who doesn’t compare apples to asparagus (apples to oranges isn’t different enough) and doesn’t follow the crowd or ignore you when you have a right proper question on something or buddy up with everyone else and ONLY talk to them, is that too much to ask? I mean...come on...I already figured out the major reason, my inbox is always open if you wanna pop in and ask what I figure out I don’t wanna say it here, I just wanna know why everyone in the group I used to associate with is literally all the same. Cringey, vintage clones who all have the same toxic ideals. Yeah no thanks I don’t wanna be apart of that
LittleMouse wrote:
Does anyone else have the insane problem of making NO friends within the clique you can associate yourself with? I’d love someone who doesn’t compare apples to asparagus (apples to oranges isn’t different enough) and doesn’t follow the crowd or ignore you when you have a right proper question on something or buddy up with everyone else and ONLY talk to them, is that too much to ask? I mean...come on...I already figured out the major reason, my inbox is always open if you wanna pop in and ask what I figure out I don’t wanna say it here, I just wanna know why everyone in the group I used to associate with is literally all the same. Cringey, vintage clones who all have the same toxic ideals. Yeah no thanks I don’t wanna be apart of that
This. Hate to say it, but, welcome to the internet. Can't even narrow it down the the wide expanse of the internet, as, this happens in real life too.
I deal with it on a daily basis.
Dealt with it today.
Going to go back in and deal with it tomorrow.
It's hard, especially when you work, and are meant to work as a part of a team. And people don't. Because, while it's work, and you are a "team", you're the outside...so nobody accepts your help, or wants to help you, or gives you your due credit.
Pirate wrote:
LittleMouse wrote:
Does anyone else have the insane problem of making NO friends within the clique you can associate yourself with? I’d love someone who doesn’t compare apples to asparagus (apples to oranges isn’t different enough) and doesn’t follow the crowd or ignore you when you have a right proper question on something or buddy up with everyone else and ONLY talk to them, is that too much to ask? I mean...come on...I already figured out the major reason, my inbox is always open if you wanna pop in and ask what I figure out I don’t wanna say it here, I just wanna know why everyone in the group I used to associate with is literally all the same. Cringey, vintage clones who all have the same toxic ideals. Yeah no thanks I don’t wanna be apart of that
This. Hate to say it, but, welcome to the internet. Can't even narrow it down the the wide expanse of the internet, as, this happens in real life too.
I deal with it on a daily basis.
Dealt with it today.
Going to go back in and deal with it tomorrow.
It's hard, especially when you work, and are meant to work as a part of a team. And people don't. Because, while it's work, and you are a "team", you're the outside...so nobody accepts your help, or wants to help you, or gives you your due credit.
Thing is, I know some of these people, they went to school with me so it’s not just an Internet exclusive thing, hence the buddying up
I have a personal vent. Is this where to go to if I need to vent here, or do I need to create another post?
Not that there's anything wrong with venting threads so long as they don't break site rules (they do often end up locked to keep sensitive things from getting out of hand), but I'll reiterate this for those still coming here:
Novalyyn wrote:
I want to encourage you to take a look through the mental health page for resources that might help. [...]
I'll also mention the group Here For You [...] we focus more on validation, sharing experiences that might help, and helping each other seek resources.
I'll also mention the group Here For You [...] we focus more on validation, sharing experiences that might help, and helping each other seek resources.
It's so hard to make friends. I'm so lonely. I want to be liked, I want people to talk to, and people who will talk to me.
Bunny wrote:
It's so hard to make friends. I'm so lonely. I want to be liked, I want people to talk to, and people who will talk to me.
I know how you feel. One minute, you’re having great friendships and relationships on here, and next minute you either become so busy or you get ghosted. It’s like you can’t go talk to your old friends anymore without some sort of stigma on it.
T̴̮̮̜̖͖̒̍ͨͫ͒o͚͔̖̼̟̞̗̔ͥͦͪ ̫ͤ̔̄͊̍ͧ͟v̗̩ͩ̌͛ͤ̚e̪̖ͭͧ͜n̨͓̹̥ͫ̌͋͑t͎̝̟̝͔̠ͨͥ͐ͬͨ̓͞?̙̾ ̧͇̳͖T̜͇̲͒̈́̚h̷̻̥͇͓ͭͪͧ͐͒e̪̯̝̊̍ͮͭ̊̓͐ͅͅ ̵̗̰͖ͮo̙̬͉͇̖͉ͩ̽̄f̵͇̞̄́͑f̲̣̙̒ͯ͑̇̀eͫ̄͏̺̟̲̟͔r̩͚ ̷̩̖̑ì͖̳̭͙̹̟̅̂̿ͭsͨͧ̓̈̔̚͏̣ ͈̱͚̖͈̙̫t͍̱̞̩͍̪͉̽̌ͦͬ͛̊͠a͉͓͈̞̙̬̩̎̈́͋ͭk̦̠͈̳ͬ͂̀̃e̡̿̽̏̆n͕ͮ̋͑̈́̊̂ͦ.͈̙̣̜͇̳ͦͥ͐͑ ͎̞͚̗̻̟̆̂ͬ͆ͅṬ͉̪̹͍̠̜̍͊h̵̍͋e̼̩͊̓̍̊̀ ̣̰̪͕̑ͦͩ͂̚ͅT̺͚̯̃͗̽̾ͅo͇̺n̘̻̋ͮ͝g̰̞͍̝̖ͧͤ̓u͔͇̘͐́ͥ͊͌̓e̵̓̋ͫ̂̍,̵̮̗̪̝̪͔̼ ͇̰͚͇̘ͭ̊ͫi̦̥͍̩̞̋ͥ͐t̴̰͛̃ͮͫ ̥̹̳̭͍̜͒ͯͣ͘i̮̥͆̏͆͜s̱̩͑ͦͪ̍ ͈̹̫̘̹̉e̷͒ͨ͗́̋̐v̛̤̺̜̑ͦ̋̆̋ͯe̊͂͌̾̆͏̼̫̳͖̟̪̘r̵̲͔̝̪͙͗ͨͭ ̶̼͉͖ͤͅs̳̘̘͔̹i͚͔͕̹̤ͣ̕l̷͖̪͕̰ͩë̗ͯ̏̐n̠̬̬͇̱̼̓̿̍ͭ̊̈́̔͘t̨̊͛ͨͩ͒.̵̮͔̍̈́͋ͭ ̞̅ͥ̀Ṫ̤͙͈͙̖̞h͍ͬe͍̙̣̲͓̯̰ ̝͈̖̤͈̥ͫ̈ͯ͌̈́ͨ̊ͅÄ̼͍͍́ͨ͜m͍͇̹̻͓̣͍ͦą͎͍ͥr̎̈́҉͕̖͎̼̜̩ā͔̻͉͖̉́̓̂̔̎n̤̤̺͓͉̭ͮ͊t̳̞̳͔͍̥̒ͪͮh̘̥̜͕̜̱̲͊̄͗ ̛̲̖̯̯ͫ̒͗Śͦ́ȉͥ͛ͤ̄̎g̲̒ͦ̏h̨̫̝̾ͬ͋̂͂̈t̵͈̬ͭͮ.̳̙͉̓̍̃̋̄ ̸̥͓̼͔̂̽ͫI̿̄ͤ́̊̚͏̫̼̰̘̲̲͕t͖̬̣ͭ̎ͤ̓̾ ̲͆̑ŕ̴͚͖̳̣̺̜̈ͨ̇ͦͨë͉̥̟̥̲́͐̃̄̽͠e͕͎̞̱͓͆k̜s̙̟̘͖̤̙̏̐͌̊̽͠ ͈̞̅́̊ͨͤ̋ͫo̡͎̝̰ͥ̆ͮ̉̑ͮf̱̫̤̖ ̟̭̰̤ͬ̅̇̈̑̐ͬḷ̭̱̭̜͔͔ͯ́oͦs͕͚͓̺ͧ͑ţ̱̭̞̩̻̯̊̃̀ͯ̌̓ ͎͇̣̣͉͙̀̒̐ͪp̬̝̙͍̲ò̭̘͓̗̃t̡̤ͣͫe͉̥ͤn͏̫t̨̒̆͌̿͛̚ỉ̩͌ͫ͆̅ä̹͕͕̗̚l̦̪̪̺̲̓̈̕ͅ.̤̻̏͛̎̒ͯ́ͣ́ ̹̰̤͉̰͓̞U̳̗ͪ̀͡n̝̰̼̈̈́̃b͉̰̫̝e̤̋̽̔ͫ̓ͅḩ̘̮̣̘̫̦̹̈ơ͐̂̊l̷͕̪̣̭̝͚ͅd̰̍̽͆ͦ̽̓́e̹̬̱̟̙͔̰͊̾ͤ̍ͨͬ́n͉̰̙̱͐̔͊̉̚ ͇̃̈́̉ͭ̐ͫ͐͘tͣͣ͊ͦo̮̟̫̳͍̥͛ͭ̎͝ ̶͙̥̅ͪ͑̆̒̔t̟̟̱̥͈̖͎͋ͩ͑̾ͭh͖̦̠̱̼̱̲͐ͦ̓ͮ̀e̡͇̖̳̰̣̚ ̣̭ͥͯͧĘ̆ṿͤ̀͐͊̅ͧ̅͟e̥̽͒̐͊ͨ̄͡r͕̫͊͛ͪ̚ ̣͎̑̄͋͗͡F͎̝̮̣͆ͤ̑͒͑͘l̴̥̼̦̼̭̽̏o͊̏̔ͥwͭ̂́̄͂͢i̝̣̗̦̝̹n̷̹̯̘̠̰̬͊g͔͈̍.̈́̊̓͆͜ ͐͏̱̗͍͎ͅL̹͖̻̜͈̭̮ͤ̊̈̔̏̃̓e̺̯̩̭̘ͪ͆̾ͮ͊ͭͩs̴̬̰̙̉̄tͪ͆͊̓̍ ̻ͬ̃̓i͙̤̣͑̐̉ṯ̭̣͔͙͛̐͛͜ ̵̫͕̲̘̮̂ͫ̓͛͂̃͋f̟̘̹̳̫̺͔͂̅ĺ̫͈̞͇͉̺̞ͩo̢͈͖̱͉͇͛͂ẁ̽̊͆ͣͥ̀,̴͎̹͓͔̬̀̅̃̅͗ ̞͔̥ͫͬ͐̆ͮ̒F̸̪̜͈̖̻͈̄̏ͪ̐͆ͪ͌l̠̝̺͕̞̳͖͂ͥͨͭͪ̀̚ö̴̗͓͔̺̪̲̳́ͤ̔͗wͨ̔̌̾ ̵̞A̶͇̜̥̪ͯ̌̓̎̿͋ͫw̯̟̳͕̄̓ͥ̾̔̌a͚̙̣ͣỷ̟̠͗.̤̫̳͉͂ͧ̽̄͊͌̓ ͍̐̑́̆ͣͮ
Translation: Tests are stressful.
Bunny wrote:
It's so hard to make friends. I'm so lonely. I want to be liked, I want people to talk to, and people who will talk to me.
*hugs*
Weasel334 wrote:
Bunny wrote:
It's so hard to make friends. I'm so lonely. I want to be liked, I want people to talk to, and people who will talk to me.
I know how you feel. One minute, you’re having great friendships and relationships on here, and next minute you either become so busy or you get ghosted. It’s like you can’t go talk to your old friends anymore without some sort of stigma on it.
Personally, I keep a pretty loose definition of "friends." If I try to hard to define it, and who I count as such, things get pretty lonely pretty fast. If I just keep to "I am typically pleased talking with these people" or somesuch, skipping putting any requirements on either myself or them, then things tend to be pretty nice.
And that's just showing up in places and just... randomly talking about whatever. No expectations.
Novalyyn wrote:
Weasel334 wrote:
Bunny wrote:
It's so hard to make friends. I'm so lonely. I want to be liked, I want people to talk to, and people who will talk to me.
I know how you feel. One minute, you’re having great friendships and relationships on here, and next minute you either become so busy or you get ghosted. It’s like you can’t go talk to your old friends anymore without some sort of stigma on it.
Personally, I keep a pretty loose definition of "friends." If I try to hard to define it, and who I count as such, things get pretty lonely pretty fast. If I just keep to "I am typically pleased talking with these people" or somesuch, skipping putting any requirements on either myself or them, then things tend to be pretty nice.
And that's just showing up in places and just... randomly talking about whatever. No expectations.
That's really useful advice, seconded.
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