Forums » Smalltalk » What Your Characters Mean to You

Jay is my longest running character, and I have been actively playing her since somewhere around 2011. She is driven solely by her desire to be more that what other people ever saw for her. Both in her human life and the one which came after. She's been reborn several times by different means but still somehow her achilles heel will always be her remaining humanity. The desire to please and comfort the people around her is something that she cannot shake, no matter how much she tries to ignore it. She is strong, but deep down she like many of us longs for a purpose.

Kenzi was a fun one to build. The place where I am originally from is intensely rural and is largely a settling point for those moving 'north' from places like KY hollers. A great deal of the families there were started when their ancestors ran out of coal mining work and so regional traditions followed. Kenzi is all about cheap beer and not so much about proper speech patterns. She's a proud blue collar worker who doesn't feel like she's of value if her hands aren't dirty. Her sense of community is a strong one, and to her they are all family. She knows that living so close to a city means she isn't quite smart, fancy, or savvy enough to fit in. But she's happy with that fact, because she knows that when she lays down each night she did her very best to make the world a little better by keeping parts of it moving. Her speech is based heavily on the place I grew up in, and I had a lot of fun turning my cultural experiences into a functional fictional person.

Lady Ashling suffers with the same OCD themes that I do. I made her beautiful, and strong like I wish that I was sometimes. However, I gave her my biggest flaw. I love writing her thought patterns because I guess in some way it's therapeutic for me to do so. I also hope that by interacting with her that maybe, just maybe other writers might be able to understand the disorder a bit better. It's not one that's painted accurately in media portrayals and it's never really a fun conversation to have. SO--Sneaky education it is. Which is why her job is technically that of an educator. It's just something I did to make myself snicker from beyond the keyboard.

Devin Marks I made her as a one off to participate in a more social kind of rp, but I just kept building her. Dev is a big mirror of myself IRL. She initially was a bartender and server which is a job that I did for several years and she shares the deep passion for it that I did. I once had a guest at a restaurant add me to her will and tell me that I had been blessed with a servant's heart so that was the concept I used when I was building her. She has the kind of bleeding heart that I do when it comes to total strangers, but also the sort of personality which is vastly adaptable if only for the sake of other people's comfort, another very me thing. Dev has a weak body, but a strong mind and an even stronger heart. Normally very shy and awkward, she feels invincible and useful when she's standing behind a bar or carrying a tray. No one will ever love you more than the person who sees their plate of chili cheese fries coming to them. She's sharp witted and knowledgable but plagued with a deep sadness from which she might never be truly free. (CW: Self harm etc.) Dev also has struggled for most of her life with self harm and a poor body image. It's something that again I feel has been poorly written in some cases for shock value. As this is something I dealt with for a long time, I thought I might try to portray the experience I had personally in a way that might help other players be more understanding..

Diana Watkins This particular character is a tribute. I lost someone extremely close to me and I was absolutely devastated. There is a hidden dedication on the first page that reads thusly:

"For those unaware, I had a loss before Christmas 2017. I'm not looking for sympathy. But I don't feel right not placing a dedication here. Credit for inspiration. In an instant, someone I loved very deeply was gone. So this character bares certain similarities to the person who left his mark on my muse forever. No, it's not an imitation of a real person who existed. Only little things about him and his being that have left me inspired and made their way into Diana. It can be incredibly hard to be the sole keeper of memories you once shared the weight of, in spades, with someone who is no longer there. Little things, small shared songs and opinions, I don't know what else to do with this information anymore. It's become so incredibly heavy in the past months. So, why let it ferment? He always loved my stories, so I guess..in a way this feels right.

I hope that wherever you happen to be, you'd be proud of what I made. I hope wherever you are, you're laughing. God I hope you found peace. I love you, Brat. And one day, I'll see your smiling face again."

It's too hard for me to actively play her.

Rémi is a character I played heavily years ago, but is long retired. At the time, I was lonely, living in a foreign country, feeling like that if I went home, it'd be seen as a shameful thing. He was a wreck, more bones than man, consisting on a diet of coffee and cigarettes. I honestly never expected him to get a girlfriend. I didn't expect my friends to like him so much as a character. I didn't expect him, of all my OCs, to get a 'happily ever after' in retirement. So because I related so heavily with him at the time, it was actually really uplifting to have all this happen to me.

Sparrow's is also retired - her RP came to an end a few months ago. She was such a fun character to play because she was trendy, nerdy, and a little sassy. In some regards, it was a throwback to a younger, weebier Claine. Want to name a deathbot 'Choco'? Sure! Want to use kaomoji and cutesy speech? Okay! Want to speed down the highway blasting PONPONPON? Just you try to stop me!

Of all my active characters, West is the oldest. He started as a fantasy character (and even his profile states that he's an AU) but to be honest, this has been the 'real' version of West for 2-3 years now. He kind of shows how my writing has evolved as I've improved / aged. For example 'Cowardly' has always been a descriptor in his character profile. Although I wasn't exactly a 'power gamer' I also didn't like to lose, so he never acted cowardly. He'd always draw his sword and without thought, charge whatever monster he was up against. And win. And even more recently, I've even been rethinking this. Because even through he may be piss-your-pants scared, even if he is fleeing, or hiding, or holding back tears, he keeps on pushing forward so he's actually kind of brave 8)

Evan is the kind of character I’d like to RP *against* and for some reason that really appeals to me right now as the kind of character I want to RP *with.* I’ve always liked when werewolf characters are interpreted not as violent, bestial individuals, but as warm and alert and familial... and that’s what I wanna capture with Evan, here. As a male character with this kind of attitude, he means a lot to me because, y’know what? I don’t need to produce more threatening dude characters than already exist. Instead, I can add to the “kind and comforting” pile.

Rho has only been out there once or twice, but I like her concept and her potential. She’s actually not super fleshed out yet - like, I’ve got no idea of her direction - but she’s really close to my heart and that makes her stand out to me. If I’m being honest, I gave her a lot of traits I had as a kid, and as a kid I had some neurological stuff going on that never got seen or acknowledged. Sounds like it has the potential to be a downer, I know, but I want for her to live up to who she is and to feel right and confident and supported! What are you gonna do, kiddo? Whatever it is, I feel like I’m gonna be so proud! *soppy mom tears*

Zeugma is a character I threw together in like an hour in order to participate in a sci-fi RP, but I absolutely fell in love with him. He’s the first character I had that was basically an open door to the world around him, instead of just receiving the idea for the character and nothing else. I like this whole “gaining an awareness of who you are” thing and it shows up in a lot more of my work than I realized until recently. I like the potential for growth, and I think what I want for him is a sort of “found family” deal. I really hope to get to explore this character some more!

Finally, I wish I could explain why I love my Ripley so much, but it’s hard. She’s one of three characters who came out of a dream I had once that just kinda never went away. I think I like her because she’s personable, and I like having the chance to put people at ease even in RP...? Also, she’s got some neat talents, but ultimately she’s kind of an “everygirl” which means she’s more versatile than a lot of what I come up with. I dunno, man! I just love her.

Niju actually started as an OC for a Beyblade rp. Now she has her own story and her spirits have become my art symbol. Her insanity somehow got her loved by many, making her my first popular character. Her personality is extremely fun to play too. This has made her one of my personal favs and I hope I can use her more on this site.

Nasr is actually a fairly new character. I designed him for a story I am working on and unintentionally fell in love with the character. I put more fragments of myself into this character than most such as his fear of new people and a highly sensitive sense of smell. In some aspect my own pain was poured into the character. He is a Valravn and is of the dark element. Those of the light element use him and his kin to their own dark purposes. As scapegoats they are the ones feared and hated. His own love of weaving nightmares and things others deem gross or evil doesn't help. In truth he has a soft heart and just wants to be excepted for who he is. Not everything dark and spooky is evil.

Wraith is actually a variant of an rp character that I used with my best friend. The rp he was apart of lasted for a solid 9 yrs. That is plenty of time to grow attached. Sadly I lost contact with that friend. I hope to use this character again but so far no interest has been shown here yet.

Kara was created originally for DnD with friends. She is a forest gnome and is the hippie/kinda nerdy side of me. She is my longest character and can do rune magic. She was created to express the Pagan-magical part of me.

Krise is the goth girl. She's very skinny and shy. She was my first character specifically created for roleplay. I actually created her on a different site, but after getting ghosted and being unable to find any kind of fantasy role play that was not school-based I ended up coming here and using Kara. After getting a bit more comfortable I moved Krise over as well because I missed her. She is probably the most "me" of my characters, though she also has magical touches. She can currently turn invisible, but I feel like there is more to her magical ability that just that. I am trying to flesh out a better back story for her, but she is my lovely little goth baby.

Salena is my World of Warcraft character. She is very very new and the least developed of all my characters. I only have the absolute basics for her right now. I am trying to save up to buy a new laptop so I can actually play WoW. At that point, I will be able to develop her a lot more. She is a tiny little hyper bundle of excitement. She represents the parts of me that get overexcited about little things and is hyperactive (I have undiagnosed ADHD).