One of the great things you find out when people refuse to call you by your chosen pronoun (instead of just making mistakes, we ALL understand mistakes) is that that person isn't worth talking to anymore. I've rarely found those people to have had much value to my life otherwise, so it's rarely a hard cord to cut.
(That was directed at no one, and was a general observation after reading about the fact to expect that some people might not react positively when posting about such things in public.)
Gender is very much a head thing, where as sex is a body thing, as most people within the trans (agender and genderqueer are considered part of the trans umbrella) will agree. And of course, there's nothing wrong with it being a head thing and that will never make it not right.
I want to toss in my two cents as a genderqueer individual as to the workings of my brain:
First of all, Genderqueer/fluid means that I flow between the two binary genders (male and female) - either that I might feel like one or the other, or that I might be between to the point where i'm femme or macho andro or just trying to be as neutral as possible.
Head-wise, it's not necessarily that I wake up feeling like one or any of the others - though sometimes that IS how it works. It's often throughout the day that I start to lean toward a particular projection. And it very much so effects how I behave, from speech patterns, body language, all these things. Though I do have to say, I never, EVER make a particularly lady-like lady.
Since I'm more often masculine than I ever am feminine, I keep my hair VERY short - if my hair touches my neck, I start feeling mentally unstable. In fact, if I'm presenting wrong for however my head feels - I become very unstable. Up to and including thoughts of suicide, lashing out, extreme emotional reactions, thoughts of self harm. That's why it's VERY important, for me, that people respectfully address me as I want them to, and thus my comment at the top - cutting cords. Because someone insisting I'm x gender when I'm not doesn't do well for my head, either.
I'm not sure if that's very explanatory as to my head process, but I hope that helps give people a view at all.
(That was directed at no one, and was a general observation after reading about the fact to expect that some people might not react positively when posting about such things in public.)
Gender is very much a head thing, where as sex is a body thing, as most people within the trans (agender and genderqueer are considered part of the trans umbrella) will agree. And of course, there's nothing wrong with it being a head thing and that will never make it not right.
I want to toss in my two cents as a genderqueer individual as to the workings of my brain:
First of all, Genderqueer/fluid means that I flow between the two binary genders (male and female) - either that I might feel like one or the other, or that I might be between to the point where i'm femme or macho andro or just trying to be as neutral as possible.
Head-wise, it's not necessarily that I wake up feeling like one or any of the others - though sometimes that IS how it works. It's often throughout the day that I start to lean toward a particular projection. And it very much so effects how I behave, from speech patterns, body language, all these things. Though I do have to say, I never, EVER make a particularly lady-like lady.
Since I'm more often masculine than I ever am feminine, I keep my hair VERY short - if my hair touches my neck, I start feeling mentally unstable. In fact, if I'm presenting wrong for however my head feels - I become very unstable. Up to and including thoughts of suicide, lashing out, extreme emotional reactions, thoughts of self harm. That's why it's VERY important, for me, that people respectfully address me as I want them to, and thus my comment at the top - cutting cords. Because someone insisting I'm x gender when I'm not doesn't do well for my head, either.
I'm not sure if that's very explanatory as to my head process, but I hope that helps give people a view at all.
Congrats to the both of you. I'll admit that I've not thought much about gender neutrality and 'agender', and it's only recently that I've discovered that there's an even greater variety to gender perception than I first thought.
As a student of Psychology, I find the very concept of someone without a solid gender/sexuality, or one who feels they have no gender or sexuality very interesting. I will admit that I can't quite understand, on an intuitive level, the concept of agender or asexuality, though I do understand it in theory... hm...
I'm going to have to go look some of this up when I get back to university next month. I wonder how much study has been done into non-binary gender identity and 'atypical' gender formation? It would be a very interesting topic to go into, especially when applied to child developmental psychology and the development of gender identity... though I would assume it to be a difficult area to research, snce atypical gender identities would be uncommon.
As a student of Psychology, I find the very concept of someone without a solid gender/sexuality, or one who feels they have no gender or sexuality very interesting. I will admit that I can't quite understand, on an intuitive level, the concept of agender or asexuality, though I do understand it in theory... hm...
I'm going to have to go look some of this up when I get back to university next month. I wonder how much study has been done into non-binary gender identity and 'atypical' gender formation? It would be a very interesting topic to go into, especially when applied to child developmental psychology and the development of gender identity... though I would assume it to be a difficult area to research, snce atypical gender identities would be uncommon.
Also, if it were me, I would be insisting that people call me "neuchacho"
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