Operation Audacious Phoenix

So, this is sad, but there is a reason I'm asking for this.

A very good friend of mine died, and she had a page here on RPR. I miss her terribly, and she was close to me, but she was an online friend and RP partner for many years.

I have no tombstone to visit, and I have no physical way to mourn her. But, I do have her page.

Aside from Kudos, I can't leave her any tributes. I also know grieving is for the living and not the dead, and she doesn't need the tributes, but it helps me to leave some.

I was wondering if it's possible if someone purchases another player a gift, the option to place it on their display even if they do not choose it themselves. She's no longer alive to add gifts to her display, but I'd love to put flowers or cookies on there whenever I miss her or think about her.

I know it's a weird request, it only really applies maybe to 1 or 2 people here at most, but I still would like some ability to do this.

Thanks for reading.

This seems like a really good idea. I hope they're able to do something to this effect.

I'm really sorry for your loss, and this is a very sweet idea.

That said, though, I have some concerns that this sort of functionality could be used to 'giftbomb' people's profiles, who may not necessarily want their carefully curated collections of items being shifted around or even bumped off their visible spots entirely, given enough items.

And yes, one might think that could be limited somewhat by the fact that most items, you have to pay for. However... some items, you do not, and you can gather a fairly large quantity of them. (Looking at you, Wicked Battle Axe.)

So anything that was kind of along these lines would almost certainly need to be mitigated with something like an opt-in setting, such as 'Allow other people to directly put items in my display case', and... If that were to happen, I'm not sure you'd get the functionality you are looking for, since your friend would not be able to opt-in.

If somebody wanted to giftbomb a deceased user they’ve never heard of until now they’d have to be a real piece of work and I don’t think RPR is big enough to attract such trolls.

Since opt-in doesn’t really work here maybe there could be another way to display gifts or to keep the gift yourself but ‘tag’ it with "in memory of __" or something, which you can’t take back.

I didn't realize there were free items, and I wouldn't ever want someone to use this as a weapon.

But perhaps, instead of all of that, what if it's more of notification to RPR. I know when my friend died, I asked about this at the time. I, however, am not my friends next-of-kin, so I have no death certificate to take over her account or take care of it in her name. Her family I don't even believe knew she was RPing either.

So if a person passes away, and the account goes into an inactive state, if a friend reaches out as I did, would there be a button that could be pressed to add gifts? That way, no one is abused, but a grieving friend could send his/her friend something whenever they are down.

Like for example, the other day I was on YouTube and came across something my friend and I used to laugh about often. I got on RPR and stared at her page for nearly an hour and couldn't do anything. That would have been a good time for me to hit up the shop and get her some flowers or something and put it there, and feel a little better.

Anyway, yeah. But if it's an abuse, no, I wouldn't want anyone harmed by a good thing. That'd be terrible.

When my best friend died unexpectedly in 2010, his FurAffinity account eventually received a 'deceased' status to memorialize it after I sent in a copy of the obituary and there was a period of no activity on the account. There were real life photos of the both of us on our accounts and the funeral card had his picture on it, so they were able to identify him I think. I don't actually know what process they maintain to validate it on their end, but some sites do this.

I don't know at which point handling this kind of information becomes valid enough to memorialize an account, but I experienced first-hand the kind of comfort that comes with having at least a notice on it. People who had no idea what happened were able to find out my friend had passed, which was a comfort to them too.

The potential for abuse has to be considered carefully here, but I'm generally in favor of some sort of indication that a profile has become a memorial.

I am very much in favor of this idea personally. Then perhaps there could be certain aspects of mourning that can be added to the individual profile to mark it as one of our fallen friends and fellow RPR members? I can't think of what exactly right now, but the idea is very nice!

I'm in favor of the this idea. What a great way to honor a freind.

Thank you, Sanne. You understand completely how I'm feeling about this. I would love some kind of indicator signal on her account. That would be such a relief to me and others who miss her.