Howdy!
We're looking for skilled players. 18+ only, who write well.
If you want to join, first read the setting and rules blurb below, then ask OOCly!
Setting: A spooky tomb! A place anyone could stumble into from anywhere. This tomb resides in an open world that connects to all worlds, and all times. Your character could walk into it without every realizing they left home! Example: Your character opens their closet door to get a scarf, but oh no! There's no closet. Just tomb.
It's also a very large tomb, and its design is open ended. You're free to add to it. Think catacombs, dark halls and dusty skeletons.
Thread rules:
- 18+ only. I know it sucks, but this is no budge. We're not gettin' down and dirty here, we just like playing with an older crowd.
- Para Rp. At least five to six sentences per post.
- Turns will be casual. If you take too long to post, or it makes sense to skip you, you will be skipped! It's nothing personal. It's healthy for an RP to keep the blood flowing.
- Don't stumble in full of arrows or throwing water balloons. When in doubt, just ask OOC if you would be interrupting something. That's all we want.
- Give us something to react to. If your character is hiding behind a pillar, ours probably won't notice its there without a clue.
- React realistically. Characters that never get startled would be un-fun in a tomb, unless done creatively.
- OCs, mainstream and fancharacters welcome.
- Chill players required. OOC should stay drama free!
- Shy players welcome here. You guys hiding in the back are often the best players.
Who can join?
Just ask us in the thread, be sure to use your OOC brackets!
We're looking for skilled players. 18+ only, who write well.
If you want to join, first read the setting and rules blurb below, then ask OOCly!
Setting: A spooky tomb! A place anyone could stumble into from anywhere. This tomb resides in an open world that connects to all worlds, and all times. Your character could walk into it without every realizing they left home! Example: Your character opens their closet door to get a scarf, but oh no! There's no closet. Just tomb.
It's also a very large tomb, and its design is open ended. You're free to add to it. Think catacombs, dark halls and dusty skeletons.
Thread rules:
- 18+ only. I know it sucks, but this is no budge. We're not gettin' down and dirty here, we just like playing with an older crowd.
- Para Rp. At least five to six sentences per post.
- Turns will be casual. If you take too long to post, or it makes sense to skip you, you will be skipped! It's nothing personal. It's healthy for an RP to keep the blood flowing.
- Don't stumble in full of arrows or throwing water balloons. When in doubt, just ask OOC if you would be interrupting something. That's all we want.
- Give us something to react to. If your character is hiding behind a pillar, ours probably won't notice its there without a clue.
- React realistically. Characters that never get startled would be un-fun in a tomb, unless done creatively.
- OCs, mainstream and fancharacters welcome.
- Chill players required. OOC should stay drama free!
- Shy players welcome here. You guys hiding in the back are often the best players.
Who can join?
Just ask us in the thread, be sure to use your OOC brackets!
Something's wrong.
Alf slid his chin across the floor and inhaled deeply. He expected the sense of wrongness to be coming from his head, but it was in his toes. He had pins and needles of a kind he'd never had before. They tickled. The feeling crawled up his skin and peaked at the back of his neck. He curled in on himself and waited for it to go away, and it was at that time- when his nose connected with his belly- that Alf realized he was covered in fur. He decided then that the prickling in his feet wasn't the only thing wrong. The floor wasn entirely too close.
I'm a cat. He knew it before he looked at his body.
I'M A GOT'DAMN CAT.
Alf went very still. He couldn't decide how he felt about that. Upset was a given. He hadn't asked to be a cat, but hadn't he secretly pined for it since he was nine? For the first time in his life, his tail thumped the floor, and not in a hypothetical way. It was really there and- wow, the compulsion to bat at it was intolerable. He rolled over and laid on his paws so they wouldn't be tempted. A man had to preserve his dignity, and he had no idea how hard that was going to be, as he had a button nosed face with eyes crossed slightly inward. The kind that brought warriors to their knees.
Where am I?
He looked down the hall. It was dark, dank, and cliche. A few empty eye'd skulls looked back. He matched their frown.
Alf slid his chin across the floor and inhaled deeply. He expected the sense of wrongness to be coming from his head, but it was in his toes. He had pins and needles of a kind he'd never had before. They tickled. The feeling crawled up his skin and peaked at the back of his neck. He curled in on himself and waited for it to go away, and it was at that time- when his nose connected with his belly- that Alf realized he was covered in fur. He decided then that the prickling in his feet wasn't the only thing wrong. The floor wasn entirely too close.
I'm a cat. He knew it before he looked at his body.
I'M A GOT'DAMN CAT.
Alf went very still. He couldn't decide how he felt about that. Upset was a given. He hadn't asked to be a cat, but hadn't he secretly pined for it since he was nine? For the first time in his life, his tail thumped the floor, and not in a hypothetical way. It was really there and- wow, the compulsion to bat at it was intolerable. He rolled over and laid on his paws so they wouldn't be tempted. A man had to preserve his dignity, and he had no idea how hard that was going to be, as he had a button nosed face with eyes crossed slightly inward. The kind that brought warriors to their knees.
Where am I?
He looked down the hall. It was dark, dank, and cliche. A few empty eye'd skulls looked back. He matched their frown.
Oh this was wrong. This was very bad. This was the kind of thing people got cursed for.
But how else was she going to get out? She wasn't even certain how she'd gotten IN! And it was too much to believe that the big iron keys clutched in the skeleton's hands didn't have something to do with getting out. The brunette gnawed viciously on her lower lip and gently pried her fingers up under the ivory bones wrapped around the key ring. This was desecration. She was desecrating a grave. Or, rather, a dead body in this case.
And she had the worst case of the giggles while she was doing it. Completely inappropriate. She knew it, even as she chortled under her breath again.
It was just. They were skeleton keys. She tugged a bit too hard. The key ring jarred. Bones rattled and clacked as ancient tendons dissolved beneath the pressure and the carpals and metacarpals scattered across the cobweb-cluttered floor. Like a lady's pearls off of a broken necklace, they rolled and vanished into the dark places.
"Oh! I'm sorry- I'm so sorry. I didn't mean- Sorry about the hand." The woman grimaced and snatched the keys to her chest, backtracking quickly away from the seated corpse. Her ass was about to get cursed. She could FEEL the malevolent spirits stirring, angry magic whirling in the air.
"SORRY!" She turned and hurried down the hall- suspiciously lit with guttering candles that flickered and wavered but never went out. She wasn't looking where she was going when she rounded the corner into a darker corridor- backing rapidly away from the revenant she was certain was about to rise up and strike her down.
But how else was she going to get out? She wasn't even certain how she'd gotten IN! And it was too much to believe that the big iron keys clutched in the skeleton's hands didn't have something to do with getting out. The brunette gnawed viciously on her lower lip and gently pried her fingers up under the ivory bones wrapped around the key ring. This was desecration. She was desecrating a grave. Or, rather, a dead body in this case.
And she had the worst case of the giggles while she was doing it. Completely inappropriate. She knew it, even as she chortled under her breath again.
It was just. They were skeleton keys. She tugged a bit too hard. The key ring jarred. Bones rattled and clacked as ancient tendons dissolved beneath the pressure and the carpals and metacarpals scattered across the cobweb-cluttered floor. Like a lady's pearls off of a broken necklace, they rolled and vanished into the dark places.
"Oh! I'm sorry- I'm so sorry. I didn't mean- Sorry about the hand." The woman grimaced and snatched the keys to her chest, backtracking quickly away from the seated corpse. Her ass was about to get cursed. She could FEEL the malevolent spirits stirring, angry magic whirling in the air.
"SORRY!" She turned and hurried down the hall- suspiciously lit with guttering candles that flickered and wavered but never went out. She wasn't looking where she was going when she rounded the corner into a darker corridor- backing rapidly away from the revenant she was certain was about to rise up and strike her down.
He just wanted to take a shower. Was that too much to ask for?
Apparently so. A bleary-eyed Paris had stumbled through his bathroom door in the hopes that he could wash the urban stink off of him before bed, and still grinding the heel of his hand against his weary eyes, the room he stepped into was nothing like his freshly furnished Ikea bathroom. No, the unsettling chill sank through his thin hoodie immediately, followed by stale air that tasted of dust, decay, and mold. Even still, it took him a few long seconds to realize he was not where he was meant to be; teleportation was not on his resumé.
After whipping around and realizing the door was not behind him anymore, he sighed heavily. Gotham, he decided, was weirder than he remembered. Either that or he was dreaming, but somehow he doubted it. It felt too real, the claustrophobic halls, the dancing, eerie shadows, the way his heart pounded in his throat...
As he hesitantly shuffled down the cold stone walkway, using his phone as a flashlight and struggling to ignore the bones, there was a sudden, disturbing racket that bounced and reverberated all around. It sounded like a voice, its high pitch distorted as it echoed around him, and he clutched the flute around his neck with a shaking hand. That was awfully frightenin-
Another shriek filled the halls. "Fuck!" he squeaked, hunching over before giving into his flight response. It was dark, disorienting, and his phone hardly helped to light his path as he wove through random passages in an attempt to escape whatever spook was present. Really, with his already poor eyesight, it was a miracle he didn't trip over anything!
Though the fuzzy object in his trajectory might change that.
Apparently so. A bleary-eyed Paris had stumbled through his bathroom door in the hopes that he could wash the urban stink off of him before bed, and still grinding the heel of his hand against his weary eyes, the room he stepped into was nothing like his freshly furnished Ikea bathroom. No, the unsettling chill sank through his thin hoodie immediately, followed by stale air that tasted of dust, decay, and mold. Even still, it took him a few long seconds to realize he was not where he was meant to be; teleportation was not on his resumé.
After whipping around and realizing the door was not behind him anymore, he sighed heavily. Gotham, he decided, was weirder than he remembered. Either that or he was dreaming, but somehow he doubted it. It felt too real, the claustrophobic halls, the dancing, eerie shadows, the way his heart pounded in his throat...
As he hesitantly shuffled down the cold stone walkway, using his phone as a flashlight and struggling to ignore the bones, there was a sudden, disturbing racket that bounced and reverberated all around. It sounded like a voice, its high pitch distorted as it echoed around him, and he clutched the flute around his neck with a shaking hand. That was awfully frightenin-
Another shriek filled the halls. "Fuck!" he squeaked, hunching over before giving into his flight response. It was dark, disorienting, and his phone hardly helped to light his path as he wove through random passages in an attempt to escape whatever spook was present. Really, with his already poor eyesight, it was a miracle he didn't trip over anything!
Though the fuzzy object in his trajectory might change that.
Alf was running down the hallway, and using most of his brain to stop his back end from outrunning his front. This body was designed to be on four legs, it was nothing like the one he was used to. He was envious of it, actually. Elegance came easily to cats. Not so much when he was driving, but in practice by the real thing, yes.
I need to get back in my body. His face was still all frown.
Was that how it worked? Was his body just laying around somewhere, waiting to be reinhabited by his spirit? He hoped not. It would be cold.
If it's cold it's dead.
Lovely thought.
He heard someone say fuck. Funny how that stood out to him over the tink and tittle of bones falling, but he was juvenile and had more appreciation for that word than he should have been allowed. Cori tried to disuade his cussing, bless her heart, but it was never going to be.
He heard other things, too. He heard a voice that fell on his ears like a warm blanket. Familiarity. His friend. His lady. Cori. He wanted it to be- FEET. FOUR OF THEM. ALL AT ONCE.
He'd never been close enough to the floor to appreciate someone's shoes before, but when two sets of them came flying at him out of the dark, the way his fur barrel fluffed was involuntary. Alf became airborne. He tottled frantically off to the side and made himself bigger.
"MAHP!" Cried the cat.
What the hell kind of sound was that? It was supposed to be a word. He didn't know which word, but not that one.
I need to get back in my body. His face was still all frown.
Was that how it worked? Was his body just laying around somewhere, waiting to be reinhabited by his spirit? He hoped not. It would be cold.
If it's cold it's dead.
Lovely thought.
He heard someone say fuck. Funny how that stood out to him over the tink and tittle of bones falling, but he was juvenile and had more appreciation for that word than he should have been allowed. Cori tried to disuade his cussing, bless her heart, but it was never going to be.
He heard other things, too. He heard a voice that fell on his ears like a warm blanket. Familiarity. His friend. His lady. Cori. He wanted it to be- FEET. FOUR OF THEM. ALL AT ONCE.
He'd never been close enough to the floor to appreciate someone's shoes before, but when two sets of them came flying at him out of the dark, the way his fur barrel fluffed was involuntary. Alf became airborne. He tottled frantically off to the side and made himself bigger.
"MAHP!" Cried the cat.
What the hell kind of sound was that? It was supposed to be a word. He didn't know which word, but not that one.
All at once there was something in the way. Something that did not feel at all like a wall. It was soft and pliable, and it didn't hurt nearly as badly as a wall would have when she bounced off of it. She screamed- she couldn't help it. It was dark, and she was surrounded by dead things. Visions of fresh corpses, zombies and murder victims rattled through her brain. Her active imagination provided details while stumbled and flailed away, tripping over the hem of the long black robe that she was very certain she did not remember putting on. It KEPT tripping her, tangling around her ankles and knees. The ring of keys clattered like bells in her hand- and then across the floor when she lost her gripand her footing.
She landed on the cold stone floor, face to face with a cat straight out of a Halloween catalog. It was thrushed and arched and spitting, uttering threatening noises. The brunette yelped and recoiled, tumbling away in the other direction- back toward the thing she'd fallen into before.
The warm thing.
She landed on the cold stone floor, face to face with a cat straight out of a Halloween catalog. It was thrushed and arched and spitting, uttering threatening noises. The brunette yelped and recoiled, tumbling away in the other direction- back toward the thing she'd fallen into before.
The warm thing.
He smacked into something. Something very body-like. Which, given the circumstances, was at least twelve flavors of terrifying.
Stumbling backwards with a cowardly cry, Paris' heel caught on one of the irregular stones laid in the floor and he hit the ground with a loud grunt. He tried to scoot backwards, the somewhat damp rock offering him little traction, as he vocalized his dismay. "Shit fuck shit shit!" Eloquently spoken.
There was a yelp, one that sounded a bit like the cries that had spurred his fleeing in the first place, and before he knew it, there was another body on him. He planted his hands on its back with the full intent to shove it off, but a flurry of... was that hair? It clung to his face like it wanted to strangle him, the gears in his head clicking to life as he sputtered and spat. There was no way it could be, but then again, who else had hair with an evil agenda?
"Cori?" he squeaked, his voice not quite past the whole terrified-cracking stage.
Stumbling backwards with a cowardly cry, Paris' heel caught on one of the irregular stones laid in the floor and he hit the ground with a loud grunt. He tried to scoot backwards, the somewhat damp rock offering him little traction, as he vocalized his dismay. "Shit fuck shit shit!" Eloquently spoken.
There was a yelp, one that sounded a bit like the cries that had spurred his fleeing in the first place, and before he knew it, there was another body on him. He planted his hands on its back with the full intent to shove it off, but a flurry of... was that hair? It clung to his face like it wanted to strangle him, the gears in his head clicking to life as he sputtered and spat. There was no way it could be, but then again, who else had hair with an evil agenda?
"Cori?" he squeaked, his voice not quite past the whole terrified-cracking stage.
For a moment, he got a blessed view of Cori's face. Yes. There it was. Definitely her. And there it went. Reeling away from him in surprise. Alf opened his mouth to talk. He knew it was possible. He'd seen strays do it hundreds of times. They spoke infrequently, but they could make words.
Nothing came out. Just more cat yowls. They were kind of like burps, and came out without his blessing.
Then he saw Paris, and inhaled so hard that his nostrils grew two sizes.
Alf planted himself in the only place that made sense to him. On top of Cori. Like a gargoyle nesting on a church. HIS church. Hunch backed and tail swooping, he glowered over the arc of her shoulder with sharp, yellow eyes.
DON'T TOUCH.
Some messages didn't need words to be conveyed well. He was a spiteful ball of fluff and distrust, and if that fluffy blonde beard got an inch closer he was going to shave it.
Nothing came out. Just more cat yowls. They were kind of like burps, and came out without his blessing.
Then he saw Paris, and inhaled so hard that his nostrils grew two sizes.
Alf planted himself in the only place that made sense to him. On top of Cori. Like a gargoyle nesting on a church. HIS church. Hunch backed and tail swooping, he glowered over the arc of her shoulder with sharp, yellow eyes.
DON'T TOUCH.
Some messages didn't need words to be conveyed well. He was a spiteful ball of fluff and distrust, and if that fluffy blonde beard got an inch closer he was going to shave it.
She was halfway up the writhing, squirming form before she knew what she had done- her hand planted directly on someone else's chest, and she knew. She felt the thundering of a heartbeat beneath her pale palm. A racing, living heartbeat. Someone was breathing on the crown of her head. Cussing into the enveloping mass of her hair.
"Excuse you!" She was offended enough to rally and started to twist to confront the potty-mouth. But then a cat landed squarely in the center of her chest. Four perfect little pawns connected with her ribs. The weight of a little black body settled up toward her shoulder. It lurched up to arch menacingly over her shoulder, golden eyes glittering with malice.
Not directed at her.
"Paris?!" The brunette cupped both hands over the cat and lurched up instinctively, just like she would have with a baby- or with her own cats back home. There would probably be little claws in her shoulder in retaliation, but the robe she was wearing seemed nice and thick. Her hands worked instinctively over the rigid back and bottle tail of the cat, mechanically soothing the stiff fur- self comfort, mostly. Petting a cat was wildly therapeutic.
"Good kitty? Nice kitty- I. Uh... Good... Harvest?" Her mind came back to her belatedly, long after she was back on her feet and petting the angry-sounding little beast on her shoulder. The hem of the dress-like robe hung well down to her ankles, swallowing all of her slender frame up with baggy, enveloping folds, stirring little clouds of cobwebs and dust.
"Excuse you!" She was offended enough to rally and started to twist to confront the potty-mouth. But then a cat landed squarely in the center of her chest. Four perfect little pawns connected with her ribs. The weight of a little black body settled up toward her shoulder. It lurched up to arch menacingly over her shoulder, golden eyes glittering with malice.
Not directed at her.
"Paris?!" The brunette cupped both hands over the cat and lurched up instinctively, just like she would have with a baby- or with her own cats back home. There would probably be little claws in her shoulder in retaliation, but the robe she was wearing seemed nice and thick. Her hands worked instinctively over the rigid back and bottle tail of the cat, mechanically soothing the stiff fur- self comfort, mostly. Petting a cat was wildly therapeutic.
"Good kitty? Nice kitty- I. Uh... Good... Harvest?" Her mind came back to her belatedly, long after she was back on her feet and petting the angry-sounding little beast on her shoulder. The hem of the dress-like robe hung well down to her ankles, swallowing all of her slender frame up with baggy, enveloping folds, stirring little clouds of cobwebs and dust.
"Excuse you?"
Yup.
That's Cori!
He was still in the process of tugging his face free from her hair when he heard a series of angry cat noises followed by a pair of yellow eyes so fierce that they were practically glowing. Paris stared wide-eyed back at the little face before him, its shadowed body arched and on high alert. Poor little thing, it was probably scared shitless down here. "Hey little buddy," he whispered right before it was lofted into the air and he was free to stand.
Carefully, he got to his feet, his arms out and wobbling as he fought to keep his balance. Falling screwed with his sense of balance like nothing else, and those damn tremors didn't do him any favors. "How did- how did you get down here?" he asked, clearing his throat to get rid of any residual squeaking as he dusted off his pants. "Is that your cat?" he asked, eyeing the puffed up kitty nervously. Please let it be her cat. One should not handle unfamiliar felines, especially when they look that agitated.
"Good harvest?" Did she hit her head when they crashed?
Yup.
That's Cori!
He was still in the process of tugging his face free from her hair when he heard a series of angry cat noises followed by a pair of yellow eyes so fierce that they were practically glowing. Paris stared wide-eyed back at the little face before him, its shadowed body arched and on high alert. Poor little thing, it was probably scared shitless down here. "Hey little buddy," he whispered right before it was lofted into the air and he was free to stand.
Carefully, he got to his feet, his arms out and wobbling as he fought to keep his balance. Falling screwed with his sense of balance like nothing else, and those damn tremors didn't do him any favors. "How did- how did you get down here?" he asked, clearing his throat to get rid of any residual squeaking as he dusted off his pants. "Is that your cat?" he asked, eyeing the puffed up kitty nervously. Please let it be her cat. One should not handle unfamiliar felines, especially when they look that agitated.
"Good harvest?" Did she hit her head when they crashed?
Oh, that was a new sensation. Alf wasn't used to being picked up. In those situations, he was the giver, not the getter. His ears swooped back, but those little claws unhooked themselves willingly. He knew whose hands they were. She'd gotten her wish after all. Swept him right off his little feet. His pupils never unnarrowed. They were fixed on Paris, and slightly more crossed than before. He'd find out they were prone to doing that when he was mad. Alf's tail picked up a predictable thump. It worsened every time Paris raised a finger, and his whiskers stayed pricked like twenty or so pointing fingers.
I don't trust you sir!
And being small wasn't going to curb his attitude.
Is that your cat?
His fur bristled again. He was so mad he could spit, and did! This time, words happened. His lungs opened right up and he spoke in a voice that was crystal clear, and awkwardly unchanged.
"IT'S ME YOU FUCKWAD."
Well he was wearing a tiny spiked collar.
I don't trust you sir!
And being small wasn't going to curb his attitude.
Is that your cat?
His fur bristled again. He was so mad he could spit, and did! This time, words happened. His lungs opened right up and he spoke in a voice that was crystal clear, and awkwardly unchanged.
"IT'S ME YOU FUCKWAD."
Well he was wearing a tiny spiked collar.
That warm little body against her shoulder was a godsend. It soothed her ruffled nerves. She found herself tucking her chin against the ridge of fluff around the back of the neck, hugging the weight a little closer to her shoulder and ribcage. Its tail beat an angry rythm against her side, lashing impatiently- she could see the cat wasn't glowering in her direction, however. Its attention seemed entirely focused on Paris.
Why?
"I don't know!" Cori responded, freeing one hand to press her palm against her brow, "I think I woke up here? I don't remember a thing before finding that skeleton with the keys..." She gestured loosely to the robes she was wearing.
"I think I got down here on my own, though. I hope so. I must have gotten changed at some point." She hoped she'd been the one to change her clothes, that was. She didn't like to think about the alternative.
"I... don't know." Her mouth twisted up and to the side. It was the funniest thing. She kind of FELT like it was her cat, but she was also pretty certain she'd never seen this gorgeous dark thing in her life. Not this particular kitty, with his harvest-moon eyes and satiny fur. She would have remembered. He was a thickly built little thing, all muscle beneath the skin and fluff. Clearly he was no one's pampered house p-
"Jerkwa- ALF?!" What?! What the- Her jaw dropped almost to her collarbone. She very nearly dropped him.
"Alf?" She squeaked again, dismayed and shocked, and then she tried to pull him away from her shoulder and swing him around beneath his little arms. She wanted a better look.
Why?
"I don't know!" Cori responded, freeing one hand to press her palm against her brow, "I think I woke up here? I don't remember a thing before finding that skeleton with the keys..." She gestured loosely to the robes she was wearing.
"I think I got down here on my own, though. I hope so. I must have gotten changed at some point." She hoped she'd been the one to change her clothes, that was. She didn't like to think about the alternative.
"I... don't know." Her mouth twisted up and to the side. It was the funniest thing. She kind of FELT like it was her cat, but she was also pretty certain she'd never seen this gorgeous dark thing in her life. Not this particular kitty, with his harvest-moon eyes and satiny fur. She would have remembered. He was a thickly built little thing, all muscle beneath the skin and fluff. Clearly he was no one's pampered house p-
"Jerkwa- ALF?!" What?! What the- Her jaw dropped almost to her collarbone. She very nearly dropped him.
"Alf?" She squeaked again, dismayed and shocked, and then she tried to pull him away from her shoulder and swing him around beneath his little arms. She wanted a better look.
"Man, I was just trying to take a shower and I ended up here," Paris moaned, disappointed that Cori had no clue how they'd arrived there either. "Like, I literally walked through the door and all of a sudden-" he swung his arms broadly around himself- "this." As he spoke, he stepped back a foot or two. The poor cat was freaked out, and it seemed his close proximity wasn't helping, and the last thing he wanted to do was make it snap.
And speaking of the cat.
"What?!?" The skinny young man hopped backwards, his arms retracting in towards his body, right hand clasping the bone instrument around his neck like one would clasp a cross. There was a squeak coming from somewhere in the back of his throat, probably the sound of his sense of reality unhinging. Sure, he could handle random tombs, but talking cats? A line had to be drawn somewhere.
He squinted at the cat, his expression a picture of bewilderment. This was... this was definitely not the Alf he remembered. Or thought he remembered. The man in his mind was a small tank with scary eyebrows who occasionally wore a very large mascot costume, something he refused to think about any more than he had to. "You named your cat after your boyfriend?" His eyes flicked back and forth between them a few times before he let out a long, resigned sigh. "Are you a witch?"
That would explain Salem.
And speaking of the cat.
"What?!?" The skinny young man hopped backwards, his arms retracting in towards his body, right hand clasping the bone instrument around his neck like one would clasp a cross. There was a squeak coming from somewhere in the back of his throat, probably the sound of his sense of reality unhinging. Sure, he could handle random tombs, but talking cats? A line had to be drawn somewhere.
He squinted at the cat, his expression a picture of bewilderment. This was... this was definitely not the Alf he remembered. Or thought he remembered. The man in his mind was a small tank with scary eyebrows who occasionally wore a very large mascot costume, something he refused to think about any more than he had to. "You named your cat after your boyfriend?" His eyes flicked back and forth between them a few times before he let out a long, resigned sigh. "Are you a witch?"
That would explain Salem.
His words were finalized by a purr he couldn't control. Cori's fault. Her hands were magic, and he'd fallen into her nuzzle without thinking about it. He'd always thought it was tricky to turn it off in his other body. This one would have none of it. He furrowed his brows and wondered if he could make words again. It was a little like yelling. He had to squeeze the air out of his lungs and he ran out fast. Was this why Strays never spoke?
Cori practically admitted walking into a tomb by her lonesome and getting lost in it. That was both nerve-rattling and hot. He'd deal with it later. He dug his claws in when she lifted him up, resisted, failed, and stuck his backpaws out for support. His face was mostly eyes. Not disproportionate, but bright on a black backdrop. Until he opened his mouth, it was easy to imagine there wasn't one there.
"I woke up like this." He sucked in some more air, and did his best to glare around her. "And I can still kick your ass."
Alf was cooling off and just didn't care to admit he was relieved to see the little guinea pig alive and well. He probably didn't know it himself.
Cori practically admitted walking into a tomb by her lonesome and getting lost in it. That was both nerve-rattling and hot. He'd deal with it later. He dug his claws in when she lifted him up, resisted, failed, and stuck his backpaws out for support. His face was mostly eyes. Not disproportionate, but bright on a black backdrop. Until he opened his mouth, it was easy to imagine there wasn't one there.
"I woke up like this." He sucked in some more air, and did his best to glare around her. "And I can still kick your ass."
Alf was cooling off and just didn't care to admit he was relieved to see the little guinea pig alive and well. He probably didn't know it himself.
"I think I must have taken a wrong door out of Legermain, maybe..." Cori mused, but her heart wasn't really in it. Neither was her mind, for that matter. She was busy looking over the conveniently sized bundle that currently was her boyfriend. He was still wearing his collar, little chain and all. And the way he squinted at her with his beautiful bright eyes- well. Some things translated well between forms, it seemed. She was pretty sure she'd seen 'dragon' give her the same befuddled and annoyed look.
"Maybe it pulled you two with me. She said things like that may happen from time to time. I don't know." Again, she trailed off, blinking slowly at Alf. Up until Paris asked if she was a witch. Her eyes snapped up over the furry little form, reflexively hauling him back into prime elbow-loafing kitty-supporting position. The words formed two deep, distinctive reactions in the pit of her belly. One, the bright feeling of recognition. YES. She was supposed to be a witch! Two, a deepest feeling of revulsion. Someone else had called her a witch, once. They hadn't meant it nicely.
This was Paris, though, and that was a different time.
"I think it was a costume. Or something like. I can't remember why. It feels racist though. And I don't know what I did with Toto." That bothered her more than anything. She chewed on her lip and gazed down at Mr. Bright Eyes.
"Butt. And it doesn't matter if you could, because you won't. WE are going to focus on- Keys! Oh, the keys! I had them, I dropped them! Darn it all to heck, I know I needed those for something! Where did they go?!" Wasn't that just like keys? Always gone the minute you needed them, only to reappear staring you in the face the second you stopped looking and gave up.
"Maybe it pulled you two with me. She said things like that may happen from time to time. I don't know." Again, she trailed off, blinking slowly at Alf. Up until Paris asked if she was a witch. Her eyes snapped up over the furry little form, reflexively hauling him back into prime elbow-loafing kitty-supporting position. The words formed two deep, distinctive reactions in the pit of her belly. One, the bright feeling of recognition. YES. She was supposed to be a witch! Two, a deepest feeling of revulsion. Someone else had called her a witch, once. They hadn't meant it nicely.
This was Paris, though, and that was a different time.
"I think it was a costume. Or something like. I can't remember why. It feels racist though. And I don't know what I did with Toto." That bothered her more than anything. She chewed on her lip and gazed down at Mr. Bright Eyes.
"Butt. And it doesn't matter if you could, because you won't. WE are going to focus on- Keys! Oh, the keys! I had them, I dropped them! Darn it all to heck, I know I needed those for something! Where did they go?!" Wasn't that just like keys? Always gone the minute you needed them, only to reappear staring you in the face the second you stopped looking and gave up.
Paris scratched his head, puzzled by their situation, and Cori's reaction to his, what he thought, fairly innocent question. He winced, knowing that he'd touched a nerve somehow, and uncomfortably fiddled with the leather lace draped around his neck. "I mean, I think it's a nice costume," he chimed weakly. "And I'm sure... Toto's fine. He's patient, right?"
His attention then turned to the feline with the major cattitude. There was a snarky retort on his tongue, one that he curbed because if this actually was Alf, he did not want to tangle with him. Sure, he was small and fuzzy, but Paris 100% believed that his ass would get whooped all the way to Sunday by that compact little body. Instead he settled for a confused frown and a shrug that begged the question: "Dafuq did I do to you, bro?"
"You mean damn it all to hell," the blond stated, his voice flat. Her self-censoring was funny most of the time, but they were in a confusing, potentially dangerous situation. And they were all adults. They could use big-kid words. "Keys for what though?" As far as he could tell, the doors down there were few and far between, but that fact didn't stop him from turning on his phone flashlight again and scanning the floors around them.
His attention then turned to the feline with the major cattitude. There was a snarky retort on his tongue, one that he curbed because if this actually was Alf, he did not want to tangle with him. Sure, he was small and fuzzy, but Paris 100% believed that his ass would get whooped all the way to Sunday by that compact little body. Instead he settled for a confused frown and a shrug that begged the question: "Dafuq did I do to you, bro?"
"You mean damn it all to hell," the blond stated, his voice flat. Her self-censoring was funny most of the time, but they were in a confusing, potentially dangerous situation. And they were all adults. They could use big-kid words. "Keys for what though?" As far as he could tell, the doors down there were few and far between, but that fact didn't stop him from turning on his phone flashlight again and scanning the floors around them.
Alf was glowering at Paris, but his face steadily grew a worried tone as he listened to Cori talk. Legermain? And who said what now? His eyes turned and his pupils widened. The world got brighter for him. He was looking extra hard. Maybe he could see more through cat eyes.
Maybe he could find the source of her crazy and slap it.
He was still doing it when she informed him that he would not be kicking Paris in the ass. His eyes had been so fixed on her he may as well have been an owl. They changed shape when she said her clothes felt racist. He looked down, over his belly to her feet. It was the fullest picture he could get of her clothes from that close.
He still didn't really get what racist meant. Someone was going to have to explain it to him someday. Thus far, everyone in Gotham had disliked him equally, and it hadn't been an issue.
After a minute or two he joined the key search. He had the eyes for it.
"I'm not leaving until I find my body." He didn't know if he was IN IT or if it was laying around or...
Maybe he could find the source of her crazy and slap it.
He was still doing it when she informed him that he would not be kicking Paris in the ass. His eyes had been so fixed on her he may as well have been an owl. They changed shape when she said her clothes felt racist. He looked down, over his belly to her feet. It was the fullest picture he could get of her clothes from that close.
He still didn't really get what racist meant. Someone was going to have to explain it to him someday. Thus far, everyone in Gotham had disliked him equally, and it hadn't been an issue.
After a minute or two he joined the key search. He had the eyes for it.
"I'm not leaving until I find my body." He didn't know if he was IN IT or if it was laying around or...
"Of course Toto is patient-" Cori didn't much like the way Alf was looking at her just then. She'd seen identical looks on the faces of cats past. It usually ended with someone running violently up and down a hallway and then tearing things apart. Or attempting to tear things apart, depending on the cat in question. Somehow she doubted there would be any 'attempt' with Alf involved. If and when he chose to tear something apart, it would happen.
"Find your body? This isn't it?" That got her attention but good. It all got her worried. Supremely worried. There might as well have been little exclamation points erupting above her head. No. That didn't sound good. That didn't sound good at all. She hugged Alf a little closer to her chest, more concerned than ever.
"I don't know, but I think that will have to wait. If his body is out there, that's top priority. Everything else can wait." She decided, curling him a little closer to the underside of her chin.
"You just woke up here? Right here? In this..." Room didn't seem like the right word, "Spot?"
"Find your body? This isn't it?" That got her attention but good. It all got her worried. Supremely worried. There might as well have been little exclamation points erupting above her head. No. That didn't sound good. That didn't sound good at all. She hugged Alf a little closer to her chest, more concerned than ever.
"I don't know, but I think that will have to wait. If his body is out there, that's top priority. Everything else can wait." She decided, curling him a little closer to the underside of her chin.
"You just woke up here? Right here? In this..." Room didn't seem like the right word, "Spot?"
How-?
How does one lose their body? Paris frowned, his key search coming to a halt, holding his chin between his index finger and thumb. These were odd people indeed, far stranger than he had initially thought. The worst part was that they made him question what was real and what wasn't, a train of thought so dangerous that he set it aside entirely. His existential crisis could wait. Right now there was a man-cat who needed help finding his not-cat body.
While Cori played Holmes, the blond man redirected his flashlight to the room around them, damp, irregular stone walls. Bones, yellowed and picked clean nestled in the creases between floor and walls, skulls perched on a few candlelit outcroppings. Every once in a while, there was a quiet scrabbling noise, what he could only assume came from rats in the walls. In a way, it was morbidly beautiful, an excellent location for, say, a horror movie or video game. Physically being there, though, left Paris with little more than a strong desire to leave.
During the course of his inspection, his posture slowly began to slump, like there was a weight pulling him towards the ground. It was slight enough that even he did not notice. "Isn't the collar yours?" he mused, eyes and flashlight following the skittering sound as it curved around them. "If your body is gone, wouldn't the collar go with it?"
How does one lose their body? Paris frowned, his key search coming to a halt, holding his chin between his index finger and thumb. These were odd people indeed, far stranger than he had initially thought. The worst part was that they made him question what was real and what wasn't, a train of thought so dangerous that he set it aside entirely. His existential crisis could wait. Right now there was a man-cat who needed help finding his not-cat body.
While Cori played Holmes, the blond man redirected his flashlight to the room around them, damp, irregular stone walls. Bones, yellowed and picked clean nestled in the creases between floor and walls, skulls perched on a few candlelit outcroppings. Every once in a while, there was a quiet scrabbling noise, what he could only assume came from rats in the walls. In a way, it was morbidly beautiful, an excellent location for, say, a horror movie or video game. Physically being there, though, left Paris with little more than a strong desire to leave.
During the course of his inspection, his posture slowly began to slump, like there was a weight pulling him towards the ground. It was slight enough that even he did not notice. "Isn't the collar yours?" he mused, eyes and flashlight following the skittering sound as it curved around them. "If your body is gone, wouldn't the collar go with it?"
"Yeah. No. Back there." He looked over his own shoulder, back the way he'd been running. It was still in sight. A light patch down the way. He turned his head back to Cori and his mouth opened. Maybe it was a smile. She was psychic, she could probably hear the naughty quip about his body before it came. Paris saved her by pointing out the obvious.
Alf's tail thumped exactly three times, slower on each fall. Paris was right. He was making sense. If he wasn't in his body, his collar wouldn't be ... around his neck. It only resided there when he changed shape.
But he'd never turned into a cat. Never wanted to badly enough to imagine his collar could do it.
He furrowed his furry little brows and looked between them. He embodied pindrop silence.
"Okay." He finally said. "Maybe I am in my body. But I still don't know how to fix this or why it happened." His engine revved again. She needed to stop cuddling him.
Alf's tail thumped exactly three times, slower on each fall. Paris was right. He was making sense. If he wasn't in his body, his collar wouldn't be ... around his neck. It only resided there when he changed shape.
But he'd never turned into a cat. Never wanted to badly enough to imagine his collar could do it.
He furrowed his furry little brows and looked between them. He embodied pindrop silence.
"Okay." He finally said. "Maybe I am in my body. But I still don't know how to fix this or why it happened." His engine revved again. She needed to stop cuddling him.