Vesania Asylum

The room was small and bare but Donovan didn't mind it, the room was quiet and he didn't have to share. He ran his hand along the wall as he walked around the small room, he would end up pacing it more than likely in the late hours when he couldn't sleep. Donovan stopped his walking and slowly eased himself onto the bed, pulling his legs up to sit cross legged and resting his wrists on his knees.

This place intrigued him, such an odd assortment from what he had seen so far. There were many he could watch, a library that he was allowed to and soon writing utensils. Maybe he could actually work here though he had yet to meet the doctors and be assessed by them, the thought of such things making him sigh softly.

A few hours had gone by since Ella had last seen Donovan. In all honesty the man both worried her and intimidated her. She had barely exchanged some words with him but it had been enough to see that the man was extraordinarily good at reading people. Not that she had anything to hide, or at least she wasn't conscious about it but not often one crossed paths with someone so... perceptive.

Also the young man looked like he had gone through hell. His clothes were all rattled and he didn't look exactly healthy even though he hadn't given any reason for anyone to believe that he wasn't. However something inside Ella always impulsed her to care about people even if she had just met them. It wasn't like a deep care yet but enough to want to know they were doing well.

Standing up from her bed she put down the Holy Bible that she had borrowed from the library and headed to the door to pay a visit to the newcomer. Leaving her room she went first to the cafeteria sneaking some cookies and sweets into her pocket before leaving to Donovan's room. When she arrived she knocked at the door gently so that if he was asleep it wouldn't be hard enough to wake him up but if he was awake he'd hear the gentle sound.

Donovan was still sitting Cross legged on his bed, his eyes blankly staring at one of the walls as if he just shut himself off inside. His mind was still going, replaying moments, thoughts and ideas. The only sign that he hadn't completely shut down was his fingers would twitch every so often and would slowly trace shapes or words in the air.

Donovan heard the footsteps approach his door, heard the gentle knock but he remained completely still for a moment longer. His eyes slowly blinked and his head turned until he could just see Ella past the edge of his hood, once again his eyes seeming to stare through her. "You never answered my question from before though I understand why you didn't in front of the nurses."

Ella blinked a couple of times startled by the strange greeting but then a gentle smile touched the corners of her lips. "Straight to the point huh?" She said as she slowly stepped into his room but not before looking at both sides to make sure there were no doctors or nurses around. Then she slowly went to the chair that laid in the room and pulled it gently to take a seat across him.

"I brought you some sweets." She said pulling the cookies and a muffin out of her pocket. "It won't be long before they make dinner but I thought you might be a little hungry." She shrugged holding them out to him and if he didn't take them she'd just set them down carefully on the bed by his side. Then she leaned in from her chair locking her lapis lazuli eyes with his grey ones. "I think you already know the answer though... you were right in both of your affirmations." She confirmed before lowering her gaze.

"I don't believe I should be here...my interment in these installations was a setup..." She explained. Each time she did this she realized how crazy it sounded, but it was the truth... or at least she thought so. The time she had spent in the asylum was making her doubt of her own truth. "I am sane, or at least... I think I am sane enough not to be in an asylum, I guess as sane as an average person." She sighed. "And I also miss freedom... being locked up here is hard... I miss my brother, my cat..." She said closing her eyes a moment before running her hands through her hair apparently trying to stop herself from getting emotional.

She had come to see Donovan to check on him, not to tell him about her feelings so taking a deep breath she opened her eyes and looked at him. "And what about you? Do you fancy this place? How was your life before this?" She asked with a gentle smile hoping he wouldn't find those questions nosy.

Donovan's eyes watched her as she walked into his room, only his eyes moving to follow her at first before his head moved. He noted her checking the halls, it was easy to figure out why so he stayed quiet. His posture straightened however as she sat down but his head tilted slightly as Ella held out the muffin and cookies, it was strange to him though he knew he hadn't eaten since the previous day.

Donovan's eyes looked down at the sweets beside him for a moment before his eyes flicked back to Ella's, his head tilting slightly. "You think?" He finally asked after a moment. "The time you spend in these places removing your sense of self? Stripping away the sanity you believe you have?" He asked as his stare watched her far to closely, watching her fidget with her hair to try and keep her emotions in check but his posture turned almost rigid in a split second as his right eye twitched a few times. "Brother..." Donovan whispered.

Donovan straightened up, his stare turning almost heated for a brief moment as his jaw clenched. "According to those who kept me I belong in places like this, that I couldn't integrate into normal society." He curled his lip at the thought. "Those vermin who decide what normal is." He hissed before he dropped his head, his eyes looking through his brow as his shoulders tensed and he scowled for a long moment before his stare started to unfocus. "My life...my studies and my ideas, all lost and unable to be recovered after the fire but it doesn't matter. I have new work to do...to return him to me." Donovan said though it almost seemed like he was speaking to himself for a moment. "To return my brother from the fire..."

When he again read her like an open book Ella had to blink a couple of times. It was just like those eyes of his while piercing through her form would manage to snatch the thoughts that crossed her mind as if he could actually know what she was thinking but Ella was quick to realize that he might also be talking out of his own experience. Ella hadn't been in a mental institution before nor had she been examined by a psychiatrist until she was interned in Vesania Asylum. "Y-yeah..." Was all Ella was capable to respond when he voiced out her own thoughts.

Could it be that he was actually like her? That he had been forced into this institution for some reason that didn't have that much to do with his actual sanity? He sounded awfully sane so far. She noticed though the moment he tensed up whispering the word 'brother' after she'd say it in her previous answer. Then she listened. He seemed to have been in many more places similar to this one and Ella couldn't help feeling sympathy for the boy. He looked very young, probably younger than her and it was just sad that he had been considered 'mentally ill' so early in his life.

He hadn't give her much context but by his words Ella could tell that at some point in his life there had been a fire where he had lost everything... including his brother. Her eyes widened for a moment. Just picturing the pain of losing her brother, the only family she had left, she couldn't imagine what Donovan had have to go through. She noticed then that his gaze had lost its intense focus, as if he was in some kind of slight trance for a moment. He seemed to think that somehow he could be able to bring back the dead... or maybe Ella had been too quick to assume that his brother had died in the fire.

Maybe he was in a coma or something and his ideas were about how to wake him up. Or maybe his brother had received some kind of trauma from the fire so that he had stop being 'himself'. Ella pressed her lips together gently as she looked at him sadly. She didn't really know how to ask about his brother without it sounding wrong . "Your brother... how are you planning to.. get him back?" She asked trying to be as gentle as possible, for the most part wanting to know the state of his brother without showing any trace of judgement in her tone.

Despite her gentle voice and how kind she had been the question of how he planned to return his brother caused Donovan's attention to snap back to Ella, an almost dangerous look in his eyes. "There is work and tests that need to be done." He answered in a low soft voice but neither his body nor his eyes moved as he spoke. "Do you think death can't be overcome, that I can't return Victor?"

It was a dangerous topic to discuss with the burned man, it was the main cause for most of the vicious outbursts in his past. His ideas and overly focused attention on finding a way to bring his brother back to life is what had landed him in this place but he knew he could accomplish his goal, these were merely just obstacles to him. Donovan stayed eerily still, his stare focused on lapis eyes for an uncomfortable few moments. "Do you pity me? Now think I belong in this place now?"

Ella was usually kind to people but that didn't mean she was easy to scare. His gaze was indeed intimidating, but she had dealt with demons, actual demons, so it didn't matter how scary a human could be it took a lot to make Ella feel actual fear. She noticed however that she had touched a sensitive subject and she knew she needed to be careful about her next words. The last thing she wanted was to offend Donovan, she had come hoping to have someone to talk to, someone who might not be insane either.

"Well, I am a catholic." She said softly, one hand slowly moving to hold a small cross shaped silver pendant that she wore around her neck. "The way I was raised, the dead couldn't be brought back, they go to heaven where their souls will live in grace..." She explained carefully. The sadness was also laced in those words. She had also lost her parents so even though she wasn't completely alone since she had her brother, she kind of knew how horrible it was to lose her family.

"However... science is advancing quickly." She said softly, showing that despite being a religious woman she wouldn't impose her beliefs on others and that she kept an open mind. "If you could manage to bring your brother back...it'd give hope to the whole humanity." She said softly with a smile. "I don't 'pity' you, but I wish you wouldn't have had to suffer so much... no one deserves to go through so much pain." She said closing her eyes a moment, staying calm. "And I don't think you belong to this place for wanting to bring back the dead." She shrugged slightly. "I believe everyone wants that even though they don't say it... They just don't believe it is possible."

Donovan's stare remained on her, not looking through or into her as he had before but rather a deep focused intensity. He continued to remain completely still except for his eyes though they barely twitched or moved from hers, their only real movement being when they turned to look at the cross she wore.

"My father was a stern man and at one time I thought intelligent but he too was also pious. A believer." Donovan finally spoke though his voice remained low and soft, the gravelly undertone becoming more prominent. "But even the strength he claimed to have didn't help him, he didn't save my brother." His gaze turned cold and malicious, his lip curling to bare his teeth as he finally moved and got to his feet. He started to almost stalk around his room though his eyes never left Ella's. "That wretched, vermin...he thought he could regain himself with the gifts he thought he had but there were no gifts that I couldn't take away."

Ella then watched the young man stand from the bed. He had been so still that for a moment she thought she had made him so upset that he wouldn't talk to her anymore. Now that he was moving though she kind of felt like a prey watching a predator move around. She was no prey however, despite being a petite woman who looked fragile she was not a damsel in distress at all. Not that she'd show her talents much though and less in the asylum. It was better when people didn't actually know how much she could do.

Her eyes slightly narrowed at his words as she tried to understand what laid behind them. There was something she was missing. He spoke of his father in the past as if he was gone too but somehow he implied that his father had have the chance to save his brother and didn't do it. There were many parts of his story that were uncertain for Ella but he spoke as if she should know them already which caused the young woman to be a little lost.

"I'm not following..." She said softly, slowly letting the silver cross slip back down into her shirt and her hands moved to lay gently on her lap. She didn't stand up from the chair apparently staying calm, trying to see what his words were implying. "I thought... you had lost your family in the fire.." She said softly just to make sure she had understood it well and hoping he would tell her what was exactly his point. The whole thing was getting a little creepy but Ella remained calm.

"I did loose my family in that fire." Donovan snarled as he turned back towards Ella, his he dipped forward, shoulders hunched and tight while his fingers almost tried to twist into claws. "My brother died, burned alive...screaming." He become highly aggressive in a matter of moments about this subject.

"My father didn't go back to save him, he chose not to go back to save him." Donovan growled, his rough voice adding to the ominous tone in his voice. "My mother died before reaching the hospital while they said my father would pull through...his prayers answered." He took a step towards Ella, his focused in a cruel glare. "He did put up a bit of a fight as I held the pillow over his face but not enough of one."

Ella still watched the young man keeping calm even as he became slightly aggressive. She understood that he was angry, that he was suffering the death of his brother who was obviously very dear to him. He had also have a really terrible death, Ella couldn't imagine losing her own brother to the fire, it was just too painful and it had actually happened to Donovan. She could understand his obsession for bringing him back to life. He missed him , it was only natural.

When he explained how his father had chose not to save his own son she felt the pressure forming in her chest. She really didn't like where this was going but she took a deep breath and listened to the rest of the story. Then he confirmed it, what she was afraid to hear. He had killed his father. Her gaze lowered to the floor for a moment but she didn't tense or react as if she'd despise him for doing such a horrible thing, she just looked sad.

Then she slowly stood to face him, her lapis lazuli eyes piercing through his own. "So much pain..." She said simply, and her hands very slowly reached for his own very carefully holding them but allowing him to pull away if he felt uncomfortable. She was warm, calm, treating the matter in a way that not many would have and her eyes lowered to look at their hands. While she actually found fratricide terrible there was no way she could blame this poor soul for what he had done. If her brother had been in danger and her father wouldn't have done a thing to save him, she would probably also hate him.... of course she wouldn't have killed him, she didn't have it in her but she was no one to judge Donovan.

The young man was both physically and mentally permanently marked by that horrible event and she wasn't going to mess with that or tell him what most specialists would have. "So the reason why you're here... is because you think that what you did was right and no one has been capable to make you think otherwise.. isn't it?" She asked then looking in his eyes again. "That's why they don't think you can integrate society..." She said softly. They thought he was a psychopath... and the worst thing was that he probably actually was one.

Donovan watched her with an almost feral look in his eyes, his body again unmoving and still but as she took his hands they were almost limp in hers. "It was not just his death that earned my place here." He answered in a in almost a whisper, his eyes so closely watching her.

Donovan watched every flit of emotion across her face, he understood it on a clinical level and even what regions of the brain corresponded with them but he himself didn't feel them in such ways anymore. So consumed by hate, anger, want and will he couldn't feel much of anything other than pain, but even that wasn't much anymore. "They think they can keep me but they will not keep me her." He whispered with the barest shake of his head. "Not when my work is through."

Ella also stared into his grey eyes and when he told her that the death of his father wasn't the only reason why he had been locked up she didn't avert her gaze or let go of his hands. Her thumbs moved carefully to graze over his knuckles very gently, tenderly even. She didn't think he was insane as in not being able to distinguish between what was real or what was not but after seeing how agressive could he get, so much that he'd kill his own father , she knew for sure that this young man was indeed dangerous.

For the way he watched her she could tell that he was analyzing her again , probably seeking for any kind of reaction to his words. "Have you... killed others?" She asked then with a soft calm tone lowering her voice as he had so that she wouldn't be breaking the silence so harshly with such a question. When he told her that they wouldn't be able to keep him locked up in here she believed him. He was extraordinarily intelligent for what she had seen so far so she didn't doubt he might be able to escape this asylum.

She didn't think it was safe to let him out after what she had heard from him but she wasn't going to stop him from getting a freedom before unknown to him. He too deserved to have a taste of what the world could offer out of the walls of places like this , maybe it would also help him to see things differently. "So you'll use your time here to do your research, that's clever. " She said with a gentle smile. " I..do really hope you find what you're looking for ... and that you can leave this place and finally be free." She added giving his hands a very soft squeeze. She wasn't lying , despite what he had done she truthfully wished the best for him.

Donovan didn't react to her touches, his hands being kindly held or the gentle reassurance of her thumbs across his knuckles. He seemed to not be able to feel them from the scarring over his hands but in truth he could though it made no difference to him. He listened to her question, her soft voice to keep the question between the two of them. "Yes, I have." Donovan answered in the same whisper voice she had spoke.

Donovan offered no explanation for his statement, no number but instead the simple short answer to her question. He could tell that she truly meant what she had said, that she hoped for him to reach his goal and find freedom. Donovan honestly thought Ella strange but he also knew truly kind people existed. He could tell that she knew it would be unwise for someone like him to get out but she wasn't going to stop him or impede his study. "You are odd compared to others."

Still staring deeply in his eyes Ella gave him a slow nod as he said that he had killed others. She wouldn't ask for further detail for now because she had gotten the information she needed to know why Donovan was here and what made him so dangerous. Not only he was capable of taking human lives apparently without even blinking but he wasn't capable to feel any kind of regret, as if it was just the most natural thing in the world to kill those who did one wrong.

When he told her that she was different she let a gentle smile spread across her lips. "I get that a lot." She said softly, again letting her thumbs caress his knuckles and her gaze lowered to look at the burns of his hands. "I have too.... killed." She said then softly without lifting her gaze this time. It wasn't exactly accurate to say she had killed for she had never killed a human but she had killed demons. Many of them. Some had corporeal forms and things were messy and bloody and others had spiritual forms and left no trace.

However if Ella tried to explain this to someone they'd think she was mental, so she hadn't spoken to the doctors about the demons she had killed. She wanted to be released from this place, not imprisoned forever. The people who had gotten her here had made sure that she could not speak of her job, or that if she'd speak she'd be considered crazy. "Since it was to protect others I never really thought of it like it was... taking lives..." She said then continuing with her previous line. "But the truth is I didn't feel anything but relief after taking them down..." She sighed softly.

She had decided to open up to him a little about a matter that he also understood so that he'd see she wan't that different from him.

Donovan slowly tilted his head as he watched Ella, leaning in until his nose was only about an inch away though the though he didn't seem to think anything wrong about it. "You feel justified in your actions." He said as he watched Ella's reactions, studying them it seemed like. "That they served a higher purpose."

Donovan straightened up, his aggression having faded. He stepped back and pulled his hands from hers, calmly stepping back over to the bed he had been given. "Does it help you feel better about taking a life? Giving it such purpose and meaning?" He asked as he looked back at Ella, almost curious of the answer.

Ella's eyes slightly widened and a fain blush covered her cheeks as he leaned in, instinctively leaning back a tiny. She hadn't expected him to come so close and for some reason it got the young woman all flustered. "W-well that's the way I was raised.." She stuttered letting her eyes lock with his for a moment before she'd lower her gaze.

"But those I killed... they were hurting others..." She said softly then , lifting her gaze again but keeping her tone soft. "Still I guess... it isn't enough justification, after all it is still taking lives, I just... had never thought about it that way.." She sighed. "Yes... I guess giving it a meaning eases the guilt..." She responded to his question. "When you took those lives.. you did it without any purpose? " She asked now looking up at him again. She had calmed down as he moved back to the bed, at least not staying that close to her and she let his hands go carefully before slipping back down on the chair.

Donovan moved to sit back on the bed, his legs again crossed and his wrists resting against his knees. His eyes slowly turned back to Ella's and he tilted his chin down to again look through his brow at her and in an odd display the corner of his mouth turned up in the slightest grin. "No." He answered truthfully. "They were mine to do with as I pleased."

Donovan believed his statement, those he killed were nothing. To him the were nothing but flies that needed to be swat away and that is what he did. "On a long enough timeline everyone's life expectancy drops to zero, some just happen sooner than others." He said as his expression turned blank again. "But such things can be given purpose, research is needed to rebuild a body."

Ella once again watched the man with a calm expression despite the atrocities he was saying. He believed other lives were his to do as he pleased? That was a rather selfish thought , and the way he was grinning sent a shiver up her spine. She wondered when had his mind been twisted like this? What had made him believe such things. Had been been raised on those beliefs the same way she had been raised as a catholic, or had he developed them himself?

She couldn't agree less with his statements and while part of her wanted to make him think them through she realized that after spending his whole life in places like this with people telling him that his beliefs were wrong and not getting him to change his mind, that way wasn't going to work. In her view what this man needed was knowing love and appreciation so that he could start valuing a life more, understand that those bonds were what made a life worth living and in the same way not so easy to take.

"Donovan." She called him softly. "As a catholic I can't really agree to those statements. In my view every life is valuable and taking it means taking a world of possibilities for them. For instance, if someone came and killed me now I would never be able to make it out of this place. I'd never get to see my brother again, I'd never get to face the church for what they've done to me. And God knows what else I would be missing in the future- love, maybe a family, I don't know..." She explained softly. "It is the same with others, for those you've killed and for those I have. Yes, you're right, some are taken before their time, but it shouldn't be by our hands..." She said looking in his eyes sadly seeing his blank expression when he spoke about his brother again.